Reposted by dbex
hoping that grandma does not bring her "Pineapple Surprise" again tomorrow because it is actually a live grenade
November 26, 2025 at 8:32 PM
hoping that grandma does not bring her "Pineapple Surprise" again tomorrow because it is actually a live grenade
Reposted by dbex
[willow naming committee]
BOSS: ok, what do we have so far?
PERSON ON THE COMMITTEE: *having a bad day* I call this one a weeping willow, this one is a pussy willow…THIS ONE HERE IS A STUPID ASS BITCH WILLOW…
BOSS: Johnson, can I see you in my office..
BOSS: ok, what do we have so far?
PERSON ON THE COMMITTEE: *having a bad day* I call this one a weeping willow, this one is a pussy willow…THIS ONE HERE IS A STUPID ASS BITCH WILLOW…
BOSS: Johnson, can I see you in my office..
November 18, 2025 at 4:10 PM
[willow naming committee]
BOSS: ok, what do we have so far?
PERSON ON THE COMMITTEE: *having a bad day* I call this one a weeping willow, this one is a pussy willow…THIS ONE HERE IS A STUPID ASS BITCH WILLOW…
BOSS: Johnson, can I see you in my office..
BOSS: ok, what do we have so far?
PERSON ON THE COMMITTEE: *having a bad day* I call this one a weeping willow, this one is a pussy willow…THIS ONE HERE IS A STUPID ASS BITCH WILLOW…
BOSS: Johnson, can I see you in my office..
Reposted by dbex
Last night, I was bitten by a radioactive lawyer and woke up with power of attorney.
November 18, 2025 at 2:19 PM
Last night, I was bitten by a radioactive lawyer and woke up with power of attorney.
Reposted by dbex
Im a fraud. I eat trail mix but never go on a trail. I drink Gatorade but no part of me is gator. I buy kind bars and throw them at people
November 13, 2025 at 1:55 AM
Im a fraud. I eat trail mix but never go on a trail. I drink Gatorade but no part of me is gator. I buy kind bars and throw them at people
Reposted by dbex
[spelling bee]
Your word is 'bananas'
Gwen Stefani: *whispering to herself* c'mon Gwen, you know this
Your word is 'bananas'
Gwen Stefani: *whispering to herself* c'mon Gwen, you know this
September 22, 2025 at 4:16 PM
[spelling bee]
Your word is 'bananas'
Gwen Stefani: *whispering to herself* c'mon Gwen, you know this
Your word is 'bananas'
Gwen Stefani: *whispering to herself* c'mon Gwen, you know this
Change a letter, make a singer less appealing:
Scott Staph
Scott Staph
Change a letter, make a singer less appealing:
Honk Williams
Honk Williams
Change a letter, make a singer less appealing:
Luther Vangross
Luther Vangross
November 14, 2025 at 7:55 PM
Change a letter, make a singer less appealing:
Scott Staph
Scott Staph
Reposted by dbex
Reposted by dbex
In a truly historic moment, NYC has just appointed her first ever mayor who knows what Skibidi is
November 5, 2025 at 9:20 AM
In a truly historic moment, NYC has just appointed her first ever mayor who knows what Skibidi is
Reposted by dbex
"Hush, Horatio. Did you not hear the Dark Lord's call? Go now and summon the others, for it is the time of The Reaping. Soon we shall be bathing in the blood of our enemies."
"I don't know, Max. I'm pretty sure that was just a can opener."
"I don't know, Max. I'm pretty sure that was just a can opener."
November 4, 2025 at 5:14 PM
"Hush, Horatio. Did you not hear the Dark Lord's call? Go now and summon the others, for it is the time of The Reaping. Soon we shall be bathing in the blood of our enemies."
"I don't know, Max. I'm pretty sure that was just a can opener."
"I don't know, Max. I'm pretty sure that was just a can opener."
Reposted by dbex
Me with doomscrolling
“We must stop eating!” cried Toad as he ate another.
October 29, 2025 at 11:07 AM
Me with doomscrolling
Reposted by dbex
The premise of The Exorcist is truly terrifying. Imagine having a 12-year-old daughter.
October 29, 2025 at 12:05 AM
The premise of The Exorcist is truly terrifying. Imagine having a 12-year-old daughter.
Reposted by dbex
[Playing "Black Hole Sun" near Neil Degrasse Tyson just to make him mad]
October 13, 2025 at 11:30 PM
[Playing "Black Hole Sun" near Neil Degrasse Tyson just to make him mad]
Reposted by dbex
caught my vampire neighbor creeping through my front door. he claims my saying “for sure dude, we should definitely hang out sometime” the other night counts as an invitation, but I disagree. we’re on hold with the etiquette hotline
October 13, 2025 at 3:18 AM
caught my vampire neighbor creeping through my front door. he claims my saying “for sure dude, we should definitely hang out sometime” the other night counts as an invitation, but I disagree. we’re on hold with the etiquette hotline
Reposted by dbex
they should add a new M&M character who's bad at reading social cues and makes the other M&Ms a little uncomfortable to be around
October 12, 2025 at 11:28 PM
they should add a new M&M character who's bad at reading social cues and makes the other M&Ms a little uncomfortable to be around
Reposted by dbex
Do I Look Fat?
- a murder mystery
- a murder mystery
September 21, 2025 at 1:28 PM
Do I Look Fat?
- a murder mystery
- a murder mystery
Reposted by dbex
[showing a picture of a man with nice hair to my barber] I want you to kill this fucker
March 18, 2025 at 6:00 PM
[showing a picture of a man with nice hair to my barber] I want you to kill this fucker
Reposted by dbex
U.S. Deploys Socially Awkward Men Along Border To Deter Migrants
September 12, 2025 at 5:01 PM
U.S. Deploys Socially Awkward Men Along Border To Deter Migrants
Reposted by dbex
I find it kinda funny, I find it kinda sad
The films in which I’m dying
Are the ones that have Josh Gad
The films in which I’m dying
Are the ones that have Josh Gad
September 9, 2025 at 11:08 PM
I find it kinda funny, I find it kinda sad
The films in which I’m dying
Are the ones that have Josh Gad
The films in which I’m dying
Are the ones that have Josh Gad
Reposted by dbex
me at 31: climate change is going to kill us all
me at 41: climate change is going to kill us all and my back hurts for some reason
me at 41: climate change is going to kill us all and my back hurts for some reason
September 11, 2025 at 8:45 PM
me at 31: climate change is going to kill us all
me at 41: climate change is going to kill us all and my back hurts for some reason
me at 41: climate change is going to kill us all and my back hurts for some reason
Reposted by dbex
Gorn Girl
September 7, 2025 at 4:09 AM
Gorn Girl
Reposted by dbex
Face down
Ass up
That’s the way I like my ducks
Ass up
That’s the way I like my ducks
August 24, 2025 at 8:01 PM
Face down
Ass up
That’s the way I like my ducks
Ass up
That’s the way I like my ducks
Reposted by dbex
This kinda sucks because I was well prepared to kick ass in a post apocalyptic hellscape in my 20s and now that I'm in my 50s I'm only suited to be a maniac warlord or reclusive enigmatic hermit who'll only help the resistance if they can convince me their motives are pure
August 3, 2025 at 9:43 PM
This kinda sucks because I was well prepared to kick ass in a post apocalyptic hellscape in my 20s and now that I'm in my 50s I'm only suited to be a maniac warlord or reclusive enigmatic hermit who'll only help the resistance if they can convince me their motives are pure