Uncle Duke
@uncleduke1969.bsky.social
Does this look infected?
Just My Nonsense:
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:2cz6x3e7thlqjc5cxa2hnbsn/feed/aaab3yqtmpox2
My Least Worst:
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:2cz6x3e7thlqjc5cxa2hnbsn/feed/aaadpxkw36ag6
Just My Nonsense:
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:2cz6x3e7thlqjc5cxa2hnbsn/feed/aaab3yqtmpox2
My Least Worst:
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:2cz6x3e7thlqjc5cxa2hnbsn/feed/aaadpxkw36ag6
Pinned
I’ve always felt that figure skating moves should have more practical names. Instead of using esoteric words like “Lutz” or “Salchow,” they should be called things like “Wheeeee!” and “Look at my vagina.”
February 8, 2026 at 6:32 PM
I’ve always felt that figure skating moves should have more practical names. Instead of using esoteric words like “Lutz” or “Salchow,” they should be called things like “Wheeeee!” and “Look at my vagina.”
Reposted by Uncle Duke
Do you get scared and/or angry driving into Home Depot parking lots? Well today there’s a halftime show just for you!
February 8, 2026 at 5:40 PM
Do you get scared and/or angry driving into Home Depot parking lots? Well today there’s a halftime show just for you!
“GIVE US THE SOCKS.”
February 8, 2026 at 2:23 PM
“GIVE US THE SOCKS.”
Reposted by Uncle Duke
[Arby's drive-thru]
(muffled voice from deep inside Trojan horse): ask for extra horsey sauce
(muffled voice from deep inside Trojan horse): ask for extra horsey sauce
February 8, 2026 at 1:02 PM
[Arby's drive-thru]
(muffled voice from deep inside Trojan horse): ask for extra horsey sauce
(muffled voice from deep inside Trojan horse): ask for extra horsey sauce
Reposted by Uncle Duke
This day in history. 1594. Scottish mathematician Laird John Napier dedicated his work "Plaine Discovery of the Whole Revelation of St John" to king James VI and predicted that the end of the world would come "in 1688 or 1700 but put a safety bet on 2026 just in case."
February 8, 2026 at 9:25 AM
This day in history. 1594. Scottish mathematician Laird John Napier dedicated his work "Plaine Discovery of the Whole Revelation of St John" to king James VI and predicted that the end of the world would come "in 1688 or 1700 but put a safety bet on 2026 just in case."
Reposted by Uncle Duke
Pro tip: Asking God to smite your enemies will ensure you never get asked to lead the prayer before a family meal again.
February 7, 2026 at 3:57 PM
Pro tip: Asking God to smite your enemies will ensure you never get asked to lead the prayer before a family meal again.
Reposted by Uncle Duke
It's all fun and games till the authorities* show up
*my cats when I'm making a tuna sandwich
*my cats when I'm making a tuna sandwich
February 7, 2026 at 7:05 PM
It's all fun and games till the authorities* show up
*my cats when I'm making a tuna sandwich
*my cats when I'm making a tuna sandwich
Reposted by Uncle Duke
The Super Bowl is turning 60 which means it’s likely divorced, wearing an Ed Hardy shirt & hitting on women half its age.
February 8, 2026 at 1:18 AM
The Super Bowl is turning 60 which means it’s likely divorced, wearing an Ed Hardy shirt & hitting on women half its age.
“I hope this thing’s recording. Okay Marla, I only have a few seconds. My life insurance policy’s in the top drawer of the desk in my study. My broker Ted’s number is in my phone, call him. Also, ask Phil to come by and get rid of the box we talked about, he’ll know what I mean.”
February 7, 2026 at 1:51 PM
“I hope this thing’s recording. Okay Marla, I only have a few seconds. My life insurance policy’s in the top drawer of the desk in my study. My broker Ted’s number is in my phone, call him. Also, ask Phil to come by and get rid of the box we talked about, he’ll know what I mean.”
Reposted by Uncle Duke
“Okay Steve, try it now.”
February 6, 2026 at 1:48 PM
“Okay Steve, try it now.”
Reposted by Uncle Duke
"Calm down, sweetie. You're two tents."
February 7, 2026 at 2:27 AM
"Calm down, sweetie. You're two tents."
Reposted by Uncle Duke
what’s a down again? dad, are you crying? -me, every Super Bowl Sunday
February 6, 2026 at 11:00 PM
what’s a down again? dad, are you crying? -me, every Super Bowl Sunday
Reposted by Uncle Duke
oh no my cwypto it is vewy sick😭
February 6, 2026 at 7:00 PM
oh no my cwypto it is vewy sick😭
Reposted by Uncle Duke
Doctor: Rest your foot for a couple days.
Me to my husband: Honey, the doctor says you’re doing everything for the foreseeable future.
Me to my husband: Honey, the doctor says you’re doing everything for the foreseeable future.
February 6, 2026 at 9:23 PM
Doctor: Rest your foot for a couple days.
Me to my husband: Honey, the doctor says you’re doing everything for the foreseeable future.
Me to my husband: Honey, the doctor says you’re doing everything for the foreseeable future.
Reposted by Uncle Duke
Immaculate conception, but it’s just a mystery bruise…
February 6, 2026 at 4:00 PM
Immaculate conception, but it’s just a mystery bruise…
Repost with a photo of yours that would make a good album cover.
February 7, 2026 at 1:46 PM
Repost with a photo of yours that would make a good album cover.
Reposted by Uncle Duke
Repost with a photo of yours that would make a good album cover.
March 12, 2025 at 11:26 PM
Repost with a photo of yours that would make a good album cover.
Reposted by Uncle Duke
I could never have imposter syndrome, it’s just not me.
February 3, 2026 at 10:32 PM
I could never have imposter syndrome, it’s just not me.
Reposted by Uncle Duke
I’ve had a few wuthering lows in my time.
February 3, 2026 at 8:06 PM
I’ve had a few wuthering lows in my time.
Reposted by Uncle Duke
Catherine O’Hara didn’t steal scenes she just showed up and ownership automatically defaulted to her
January 30, 2026 at 6:45 PM
Catherine O’Hara didn’t steal scenes she just showed up and ownership automatically defaulted to her
Reposted by Uncle Duke
Hey kids! Apparently I am a "big communist account" now, check me out
February 7, 2026 at 12:41 PM
Hey kids! Apparently I am a "big communist account" now, check me out
Reposted by Uncle Duke
thinking about cosplaying as a bear gives me pause. folks,,
February 7, 2026 at 12:59 PM
thinking about cosplaying as a bear gives me pause. folks,,
Reposted by Uncle Duke
Imagine owning enough wine at any given point in time that you actually need one of these "wine racks" lol
February 7, 2026 at 4:36 AM
Imagine owning enough wine at any given point in time that you actually need one of these "wine racks" lol