@kattsdogma.bsky.social
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*2 seconds after taking my meds* oh shit did i take my meds 🤔
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cracking open a tall boy who’s a cold one
November 11, 2025 at 2:01 AM
cracking open a tall boy who’s a cold one
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I am, for the public record, not attracted to sandwiches but muffuletta sounds pretty goddamn sexy.
October 23, 2025 at 8:36 PM
I am, for the public record, not attracted to sandwiches but muffuletta sounds pretty goddamn sexy.
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The rare sight of grandma scat in a pile of mulch.
September 24, 2025 at 8:22 PM
The rare sight of grandma scat in a pile of mulch.
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No one tells you when you have kids that one day they will break your heart and all you will be able to think about it how much of a shithead you were to your own parents at that age. So yeah, how’s your day…
October 24, 2025 at 2:25 AM
No one tells you when you have kids that one day they will break your heart and all you will be able to think about it how much of a shithead you were to your own parents at that age. So yeah, how’s your day…
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Everyone, please stop putting me on “sexiest penis” lists. Enough already.
November 9, 2025 at 9:45 PM
Everyone, please stop putting me on “sexiest penis” lists. Enough already.
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Sometimes what the doctor ordered is a nice lil beige meal
November 10, 2025 at 10:13 PM
Sometimes what the doctor ordered is a nice lil beige meal
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Babies are so weak. You don't hear me crying every time I crap my pants
November 11, 2025 at 1:21 AM
Babies are so weak. You don't hear me crying every time I crap my pants
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My therapist says all the people in my phone aren’t real and can’t hurt me.
I found his social media, and he was making fun of me. What a moron. He doesn’t even know he isn’t real.
I found his social media, and he was making fun of me. What a moron. He doesn’t even know he isn’t real.
November 6, 2025 at 12:42 AM
My therapist says all the people in my phone aren’t real and can’t hurt me.
I found his social media, and he was making fun of me. What a moron. He doesn’t even know he isn’t real.
I found his social media, and he was making fun of me. What a moron. He doesn’t even know he isn’t real.
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i didnt drop it like its hot i dropped it because im clumsy
November 11, 2025 at 3:05 AM
i didnt drop it like its hot i dropped it because im clumsy
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pretty sure because of Double Jeopardy law Sean Dunn can now throw as many sandwichs as he wants at federal agents
November 9, 2025 at 6:39 PM
pretty sure because of Double Jeopardy law Sean Dunn can now throw as many sandwichs as he wants at federal agents
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accidentally wore my i’m a pussy ass bitch t-shirt and now i’m in congress
November 10, 2025 at 5:17 PM
accidentally wore my i’m a pussy ass bitch t-shirt and now i’m in congress
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Can't. I am busy trying to figure out what facial expressions and dance steps I would use as I pass through the singing staff lines on the way to appear on the Jennifer Hudson show.
November 4, 2025 at 9:17 PM
Can't. I am busy trying to figure out what facial expressions and dance steps I would use as I pass through the singing staff lines on the way to appear on the Jennifer Hudson show.
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formula one but all the cars are the fuck truck from titanic
November 9, 2025 at 1:10 AM
formula one but all the cars are the fuck truck from titanic
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You don’t suffer fools gladly?
But sir, may I point out that you’re on social media voluntarily?
But sir, may I point out that you’re on social media voluntarily?
November 9, 2025 at 11:20 AM
You don’t suffer fools gladly?
But sir, may I point out that you’re on social media voluntarily?
But sir, may I point out that you’re on social media voluntarily?
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there’s literally nothing better than sleeping. I don’t understand why we don’t all sleep a lot more.
November 9, 2025 at 6:16 PM
there’s literally nothing better than sleeping. I don’t understand why we don’t all sleep a lot more.
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When someone has a little too much enthusiasm on a Monday morning
November 9, 2025 at 8:33 PM
When someone has a little too much enthusiasm on a Monday morning
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My darkest secret:
I haven't drank morning coffee in a year.
My second darkest secret: I secretly replaced the good coffee with the cheap coffee.
I haven't drank morning coffee in a year.
My second darkest secret: I secretly replaced the good coffee with the cheap coffee.
November 10, 2025 at 1:53 PM
My darkest secret:
I haven't drank morning coffee in a year.
My second darkest secret: I secretly replaced the good coffee with the cheap coffee.
I haven't drank morning coffee in a year.
My second darkest secret: I secretly replaced the good coffee with the cheap coffee.
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I'm fed up with golf and am incinerating my clubs. First I burned my woods and now I've got a lot of irons in the fire.
November 3, 2025 at 10:03 PM
I'm fed up with golf and am incinerating my clubs. First I burned my woods and now I've got a lot of irons in the fire.
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every since i was a little boy i knew i wanted to be in a starter pack
November 10, 2025 at 4:10 PM
every since i was a little boy i knew i wanted to be in a starter pack
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slipping a thanksgiving ham under my dress and telling people i’m all sweaty bc i’m in labor
November 9, 2025 at 10:44 PM
slipping a thanksgiving ham under my dress and telling people i’m all sweaty bc i’m in labor
“i fold,” said the poker player & the laundromat guy & the origami artist & the dems &
November 10, 2025 at 9:10 PM
“i fold,” said the poker player & the laundromat guy & the origami artist & the dems &
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I will peel a carrot or I will wash a carrot but no way am I doing both.
Pastor: These are very unusual vows.
Pastor: These are very unusual vows.
January 9, 2025 at 3:29 AM
I will peel a carrot or I will wash a carrot but no way am I doing both.
Pastor: These are very unusual vows.
Pastor: These are very unusual vows.
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ME: Whatcha doin?
WIFE: Watchin Dune.
ME: I asked you first, Sharon.
WIFE: Watchin Dune.
ME: I asked you first, Sharon.
November 8, 2025 at 8:44 PM
ME: Whatcha doin?
WIFE: Watchin Dune.
ME: I asked you first, Sharon.
WIFE: Watchin Dune.
ME: I asked you first, Sharon.
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Everyone’s gangster until they hear their own voice on a recording.
November 10, 2025 at 5:49 PM
Everyone’s gangster until they hear their own voice on a recording.