Matt
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badthoughthaver.bsky.social
Matt
@badthoughthaver.bsky.social
Nerd, geek, dork, loser.

Please help: My thoughts, they are bad.

Said thoughts: bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaaolkthurmh6

Pfp by @geraldinepiche.bsky.social
Pinned
My personality? Imagine if Marvin the Paranoid Android and Eeyore fucked.
Reposted by Matt
it’s called a headboard because that’s what ya hold onto when receiving head
February 10, 2026 at 1:36 PM
Anybody wanna bang and then sit next to each other silently scrolling Bluesky the rest of the day? I've had enough of work for one lifetime.
February 10, 2026 at 11:51 AM
Reposted by Matt
Have we found out if they’re giants or not yet?
February 10, 2026 at 5:49 AM
It's been a STARSET kind of morning, wouldn't you agree? Because you should.
February 10, 2026 at 11:00 AM
Reposted by Matt
if you ever need to make someone throw up in their mouth a little just start describing the color of your discharge if that doesn’t work you can add descriptions of texture as well but
February 10, 2026 at 1:05 AM
Reposted by Matt
Why do they call it a pair of shoes when sole mates was right there?
February 10, 2026 at 1:04 AM
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Buttigieg is a great name for a dildo.
February 9, 2026 at 10:21 PM
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If you don’t print a dragon, why did you even get a 3D printer?
February 9, 2026 at 7:48 PM
Reposted by Matt
Perusing
Online
Risqué
Nakedness
February 9, 2026 at 9:55 PM
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I’m gonna put all my favorite football players in my drafts so I’m actually ready for my next fantasy football league.
February 9, 2026 at 9:39 PM
Reposted by Matt
I’m sorry if I offended you, I was trying to offend someone else (your mom)
February 9, 2026 at 8:53 PM
Any relationship I have is a polycule bc first and foremost, I belong to the rhythm
Any relationship I have is a polycule bc first and foremost, I belong to my demons
any relationship i may have is a throuple bc first and foremost i belong to god
February 9, 2026 at 8:55 PM
Fuck Discord, find me on the coMA Kai forums circa 2002
February 9, 2026 at 8:41 PM
Reverse cowgirl so I can play dat ass like bongos
February 9, 2026 at 3:36 PM
One day, maybe I'll figure out what the fuck it is you want from me. Today is not that day.
February 9, 2026 at 3:34 PM
Get the fuck off TikTok, ditch your Ring cameras. This goes for everyone, but it absolutely goes for anybody in the US.
February 9, 2026 at 2:45 PM
Reposted by Matt
She's a 10/10 but excel thinks she's October 10th
February 9, 2026 at 10:30 AM
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after all why not? why shouldn't I believe it's butter?
February 9, 2026 at 5:52 AM
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i almost caught the wizard
stealing cars but he saw me
coming and flew the coupe
February 9, 2026 at 5:49 AM
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You seem unbearable. <inspired>
February 9, 2026 at 5:40 AM
Reposted by Matt
how was the TPusa Halftime Show For Dads Who Can Only See Their Kids On Weekends But Don’t
February 9, 2026 at 3:37 AM
I knew I should have worn my formal sweatpants for this wedding. Turns out I'm not getting married after all.
I knew I should have worn my formal sweatpants for this job interview
February 9, 2026 at 10:23 AM
*blearily opening my eyes at 3:15am and checking the score*
I think we can all agree that the most important thing is that the Patriots are taking a whoppin'.
*passes back out*
February 9, 2026 at 3:22 AM
It fucking happened again. Somebody help.
Somebody get up and take my meds for me, I already got into bed.
February 8, 2026 at 11:33 PM
Add decision fatigue/paralysis to the list of my most attractive features that are absolutely sure to attract a prospective partner 🙄
February 8, 2026 at 10:03 PM