Danny
@mardigroan.bsky.social
My writing's been found on food shopping lists & mini golf scores
My Bluesky tweets: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:aiszm5s7rajxmnj5t35tm4qh/feed/aaadebecxn2si
My Bluesky tweets: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:aiszm5s7rajxmnj5t35tm4qh/feed/aaadebecxn2si
Pinned
Dr. Frankenstein: Did your intuition return?
Igor: Yes I got my hunch back.
Igor: Yes I got my hunch back.
Reposted by Danny
“I. Know how to use periods”
December 2, 2025 at 12:00 AM
“I. Know how to use periods”
Reposted by Danny
I leave my bed unmade; I like to see the exact moment I gave up bliss for responsibility.
December 6, 2025 at 9:23 PM
I leave my bed unmade; I like to see the exact moment I gave up bliss for responsibility.
Reposted by Danny
Life hack: instead of paying movers just give all your stuff away
February 18, 2026 at 4:11 PM
Life hack: instead of paying movers just give all your stuff away
Reposted by Danny
Kid Rock waking up and having no memory of the past 24 hours
February 19, 2026 at 4:33 AM
Kid Rock waking up and having no memory of the past 24 hours
Reposted by Danny
Being graded hard against a soft curve wouldn’t fix everything but it would be a start.
February 19, 2026 at 4:38 AM
Being graded hard against a soft curve wouldn’t fix everything but it would be a start.
Reposted by Danny
Americans sometimes use French words like "hors d'oeuvres." And that's just for starters.
February 19, 2026 at 4:40 AM
Americans sometimes use French words like "hors d'oeuvres." And that's just for starters.
Reposted by Danny
Arby's thought they had the meats.
February 19, 2026 at 3:38 AM
Arby's thought they had the meats.
Reposted by Danny
First date idea: we get high and take a nap
February 18, 2026 at 6:38 AM
First date idea: we get high and take a nap
Reposted by Danny
With all due respect to Robert Frost, if Hollywood has taught me anything, it's that the 'road less traveled' always leads to a cabin occupied by a family of murderous hillbillies.
February 18, 2026 at 5:55 PM
With all due respect to Robert Frost, if Hollywood has taught me anything, it's that the 'road less traveled' always leads to a cabin occupied by a family of murderous hillbillies.
Reposted by Danny
Fuck Calgon, I need the woke mob to take me away.
February 18, 2026 at 11:55 PM
Fuck Calgon, I need the woke mob to take me away.
Reposted by Danny
FRENCH GUY: do you speak french
ME: no
FRENCH GUY: ah well c'est la vie
ME: la vie
ME: no
FRENCH GUY: ah well c'est la vie
ME: la vie
February 19, 2026 at 1:09 AM
FRENCH GUY: do you speak french
ME: no
FRENCH GUY: ah well c'est la vie
ME: la vie
ME: no
FRENCH GUY: ah well c'est la vie
ME: la vie
Reposted by Danny
INVENTOR OF CONTRACTIONS: you know what the word “not” is too fucking long
February 17, 2026 at 5:59 PM
INVENTOR OF CONTRACTIONS: you know what the word “not” is too fucking long
Spoiler alert.
A bit of a Shrinking spoiler.
How about Harrison Ford with some very identifiable John Williams notes? Did you catch that?
A bit of a Shrinking spoiler.
How about Harrison Ford with some very identifiable John Williams notes? Did you catch that?
February 19, 2026 at 3:28 AM
Spoiler alert.
A bit of a Shrinking spoiler.
How about Harrison Ford with some very identifiable John Williams notes? Did you catch that?
A bit of a Shrinking spoiler.
How about Harrison Ford with some very identifiable John Williams notes? Did you catch that?
Reposted by Danny
look, dancing with my pants down in front of the Arby’s might not be the best way to earn money but at least I’m my own boss
February 19, 2026 at 3:08 AM
look, dancing with my pants down in front of the Arby’s might not be the best way to earn money but at least I’m my own boss
Reposted by Danny
Sorry, I can’t. I have plans to not do that thing.
February 19, 2026 at 12:15 AM
Sorry, I can’t. I have plans to not do that thing.
Reposted by Danny
Greeting card that says I'm sorry for talking to your child like it was a dog
February 19, 2026 at 12:02 AM
Greeting card that says I'm sorry for talking to your child like it was a dog
Reposted by Danny
The irony of the person with the XCLR8 license plate going 30 under the speed limit was not lost on me
February 19, 2026 at 12:23 AM
The irony of the person with the XCLR8 license plate going 30 under the speed limit was not lost on me
Thread
(or dog leash?) 🐾
(or dog leash?) 🐾
For My Dog, Larry
In the summer, deep in grief, I didn’t think of much at all. As the flowers you watched me plant bloomed, I cut clippings to put in tiny vases by your photo. When the fall came and the leaves plastered the sidewalks of our neighborhood, I did not walk them.
In the summer, deep in grief, I didn’t think of much at all. As the flowers you watched me plant bloomed, I cut clippings to put in tiny vases by your photo. When the fall came and the leaves plastered the sidewalks of our neighborhood, I did not walk them.
February 18, 2026 at 10:59 PM
Thread
(or dog leash?) 🐾
(or dog leash?) 🐾
Reposted by Danny
Tom Petty really nailed the vibe of skydiving videos twice with "Learning To Fly" AND "Freefalling." Tom Petty is to skydiving as Jimmy Buffett is to margaritas
September 27, 2024 at 9:32 PM
Tom Petty really nailed the vibe of skydiving videos twice with "Learning To Fly" AND "Freefalling." Tom Petty is to skydiving as Jimmy Buffett is to margaritas
Reposted by Danny
looksmaxxing is out. looksminning only. rubbing dirt on my face before leaving the house. pizza grease on everything. fluorescent lighting only. if you can't handle me at my wrecked, you don't deserve me at my showered.
February 18, 2026 at 8:47 PM
looksmaxxing is out. looksminning only. rubbing dirt on my face before leaving the house. pizza grease on everything. fluorescent lighting only. if you can't handle me at my wrecked, you don't deserve me at my showered.
Reposted by Danny
my opinionated baby: WHAT
February 18, 2026 at 7:31 PM
my opinionated baby: WHAT
Reposted by Danny
How long does it take a Happy Meal to start working?
February 18, 2026 at 7:25 PM
How long does it take a Happy Meal to start working?
Reposted by Danny
Spoon is my favorite of all the cutlery bands.
February 18, 2026 at 6:00 PM
Spoon is my favorite of all the cutlery bands.
Reposted by Danny
“Best If Used By,” huh?
That’s just Big Expiration pulling one over on you.
That’s just Big Expiration pulling one over on you.
February 18, 2026 at 5:27 PM
“Best If Used By,” huh?
That’s just Big Expiration pulling one over on you.
That’s just Big Expiration pulling one over on you.
Reposted by Danny
“Good to know.”
But it was not, in fact, good to know.
But it was not, in fact, good to know.
February 18, 2026 at 11:31 AM
“Good to know.”
But it was not, in fact, good to know.
But it was not, in fact, good to know.