Cosmic Clau
@cosmicclau.bsky.social
"Without hope, without witness, without reward"
"The best part about your opinion, is that it doesn't matter"
Gen X hermit
Dog Mum
She/her
Tired
Meh
I found these on the floor
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:4gaf6ocrfcm5fr7cad5oa63p/feed/aaadxi62w5evu
"The best part about your opinion, is that it doesn't matter"
Gen X hermit
Dog Mum
She/her
Tired
Meh
I found these on the floor
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:4gaf6ocrfcm5fr7cad5oa63p/feed/aaadxi62w5evu
Pinned
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
“Nothing is literally on fire...it just feels that way!"
“Nothing is literally on fire...it just feels that way!"
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
“well that was a strange choice”
“well that was a strange choice”
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
“looks good to me”
“looks good to me”
February 8, 2026 at 7:22 AM
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
“Nothing is literally on fire...it just feels that way!"
“Nothing is literally on fire...it just feels that way!"
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
*sigh* "Don't worry about it. Erections are just a physiological response. They mean nothing to me."
*sigh* "Don't worry about it. Erections are just a physiological response. They mean nothing to me."
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
“well that was a strange choice”
“well that was a strange choice”
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
“looks good to me”
“looks good to me”
February 8, 2026 at 7:24 AM
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
*sigh* "Don't worry about it. Erections are just a physiological response. They mean nothing to me."
*sigh* "Don't worry about it. Erections are just a physiological response. They mean nothing to me."
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
“We should just set it on fire.”
“We should just set it on fire.”
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
“well that was a strange choice”
“well that was a strange choice”
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
“looks good to me”
“looks good to me”
February 8, 2026 at 7:35 AM
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
“We should just set it on fire.”
“We should just set it on fire.”
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
MURDER SCENE-
DETECTIVE: Did your husband have any enemies that you know of?
WIFE: Well, the cat next door never seemed to like him and I always thought that was odd.
DETECTIVE: Did your husband have any enemies that you know of?
WIFE: Well, the cat next door never seemed to like him and I always thought that was odd.
February 8, 2026 at 4:44 AM
MURDER SCENE-
DETECTIVE: Did your husband have any enemies that you know of?
WIFE: Well, the cat next door never seemed to like him and I always thought that was odd.
DETECTIVE: Did your husband have any enemies that you know of?
WIFE: Well, the cat next door never seemed to like him and I always thought that was odd.
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
Looking to travel alone somewhere safe and warm and humid and overwhelmed with the anguished screams of the damned and maybe with a three headed rottweiler or two.
February 8, 2026 at 5:09 AM
Looking to travel alone somewhere safe and warm and humid and overwhelmed with the anguished screams of the damned and maybe with a three headed rottweiler or two.
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
Person who named apples: okay boss, I got a real good one lined up.Check this out "Golden Delicious"
Their boss: Oh yeah, that's the stuff. And this is for the tastiest apple of all? A beautiful colour, wonderful texture, and delicious sharp tang?
Person who named apples: Lol, lmao. No
Their boss: Oh yeah, that's the stuff. And this is for the tastiest apple of all? A beautiful colour, wonderful texture, and delicious sharp tang?
Person who named apples: Lol, lmao. No
February 8, 2026 at 5:17 AM
Person who named apples: okay boss, I got a real good one lined up.Check this out "Golden Delicious"
Their boss: Oh yeah, that's the stuff. And this is for the tastiest apple of all? A beautiful colour, wonderful texture, and delicious sharp tang?
Person who named apples: Lol, lmao. No
Their boss: Oh yeah, that's the stuff. And this is for the tastiest apple of all? A beautiful colour, wonderful texture, and delicious sharp tang?
Person who named apples: Lol, lmao. No
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
[ whispering instructions to moth ]
February 8, 2026 at 5:18 AM
[ whispering instructions to moth ]
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
hot messes followed here
February 8, 2026 at 5:28 AM
hot messes followed here
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
If you think I’m annoying, you should meet you.
February 8, 2026 at 5:28 AM
If you think I’m annoying, you should meet you.
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
a super bowl commercial crossover between nintendos tecmo bowl and the sunglass hut hut hut
February 8, 2026 at 5:33 AM
a super bowl commercial crossover between nintendos tecmo bowl and the sunglass hut hut hut
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
Feeling sorry for myself but like, winking at gratitude -me flirting sorry for myself
February 8, 2026 at 5:54 AM
Feeling sorry for myself but like, winking at gratitude -me flirting sorry for myself
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
Poltergeist as decluttering tool, is this a thing?
February 8, 2026 at 5:54 AM
Poltergeist as decluttering tool, is this a thing?
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work
“going to the library”
“going to the library”
without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work
“do you want me to do grinds?”
“do you want me to do grinds?”
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
Lay down on the bed and lift up your shirt for me.
Lay down on the bed and lift up your shirt for me.
February 8, 2026 at 2:54 AM
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work
“going to the library”
“going to the library”
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work
“do you want me to do grinds?”
“do you want me to do grinds?”
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
Lay down on the bed and lift up your shirt for me.
Lay down on the bed and lift up your shirt for me.
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
Look, you dont have to take my advice, but you're still paying for it.
Look, you dont have to take my advice, but you're still paying for it.
February 8, 2026 at 2:29 AM
without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work
“do you want me to do grinds?”
“do you want me to do grinds?”
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
good news, despite the poor ratings the network execs green-lit another season of my posts
February 8, 2026 at 2:59 AM
good news, despite the poor ratings the network execs green-lit another season of my posts
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
tomamto sangwich
I pronounce “sandwich” with a hard G 😤
February 8, 2026 at 3:25 AM
tomamto sangwich
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
your struggle bus or mine?
February 8, 2026 at 3:26 AM
your struggle bus or mine?
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
The special souls who help you make sense of it all. Whether in your arms or in your heart, keep them close.
February 8, 2026 at 3:26 AM
The special souls who help you make sense of it all. Whether in your arms or in your heart, keep them close.
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
The night in no particular order.
February 8, 2026 at 4:04 AM
The night in no particular order.
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
We're moving on from a generation with daddy issues to one with mommy issues.
Yay, progress.
Yay, progress.
February 8, 2026 at 4:04 AM
We're moving on from a generation with daddy issues to one with mommy issues.
Yay, progress.
Yay, progress.
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
I become the world’s tiniest person when I have to get my meds at the drive-thru pharmacy
I become the world’s tiniest person when I have to put mail in the drive through postal box.
I become the world’s tiniest lady when I have to reach for the ticket in the parking garage.
February 8, 2026 at 4:07 AM
I become the world’s tiniest person when I have to get my meds at the drive-thru pharmacy
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
I become the world’s tiniest person when I have to put mail in the drive through postal box.
I become the world’s tiniest lady when I have to reach for the ticket in the parking garage.
February 8, 2026 at 3:42 AM
I become the world’s tiniest person when I have to put mail in the drive through postal box.
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
I become the world’s tiniest lady when I have to reach for the ticket in the parking garage.
February 8, 2026 at 3:40 AM
I become the world’s tiniest lady when I have to reach for the ticket in the parking garage.
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
“Just back it in and I’ll get you loaded”
“Just back it in and I’ll get you loaded”
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
“well that was a strange choice”
“well that was a strange choice”
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
“looks good to me”
“looks good to me”
February 8, 2026 at 2:04 AM
Without naming your job, tell me something you say over and over again at work.
“Just back it in and I’ll get you loaded”
“Just back it in and I’ll get you loaded”
Reposted by Cosmic Clau
At a minimum this daddy daughter dance needs a cash bar.
February 8, 2026 at 12:22 AM
At a minimum this daddy daughter dance needs a cash bar.