Kellalena
@kellalena.bsky.social
Make me laugh and I’ll love you forever 👀
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:vvlw2ggojhkpmivjzdcniuzr/feed/aaafyok6b2wuy
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:vvlw2ggojhkpmivjzdcniuzr/feed/aaafyok6b2wuy
Pinned
I am unstoppable unless there’s a minor inconvenience.
Reposted by Kellalena
My New Year's resolution is to become a Vagitarian
December 31, 2025 at 12:56 PM
My New Year's resolution is to become a Vagitarian
Reposted by Kellalena
I've always thought it was weird to tell people on a social media app goodnight. Why do that?
January 1, 2026 at 2:52 AM
I've always thought it was weird to tell people on a social media app goodnight. Why do that?
Reposted by Kellalena
There are people that find forgotten money in their coat pockets. I just found a spork in mine
January 2, 2026 at 3:11 PM
There are people that find forgotten money in their coat pockets. I just found a spork in mine
Reposted by Kellalena
Just realized a post I made a week ago has a typo 🤦♂️
January 2, 2026 at 5:12 PM
Just realized a post I made a week ago has a typo 🤦♂️
Reposted by Kellalena
Billie Jean is not my hors d'oeuvre
January 4, 2026 at 12:23 AM
Billie Jean is not my hors d'oeuvre
Reposted by Kellalena
Why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near?
Me: (absolutely slathered head to toe in peanut butter and birdseed) I think that's obvious by now.
Me: (absolutely slathered head to toe in peanut butter and birdseed) I think that's obvious by now.
January 3, 2026 at 10:18 PM
Why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near?
Me: (absolutely slathered head to toe in peanut butter and birdseed) I think that's obvious by now.
Me: (absolutely slathered head to toe in peanut butter and birdseed) I think that's obvious by now.
Reposted by Kellalena
I'm into factually incorrect sexting
January 3, 2026 at 11:44 PM
I'm into factually incorrect sexting
Reposted by Kellalena
*pokes world leaders with a stick*
Do something
Do something
January 4, 2026 at 12:43 AM
*pokes world leaders with a stick*
Do something
Do something
Reposted by Kellalena
My one resolution this year is to smack a crocodile while wearing meat underwear.
January 3, 2026 at 8:40 PM
My one resolution this year is to smack a crocodile while wearing meat underwear.
Reposted by Kellalena
It’s fine guys he has identified a giraffe three times let him cook
January 3, 2026 at 11:20 AM
It’s fine guys he has identified a giraffe three times let him cook
Reposted by Kellalena
we held our collective breath for mere seconds before the fuckery continued unabated
January 3, 2026 at 11:03 PM
we held our collective breath for mere seconds before the fuckery continued unabated
Reposted by Kellalena
the never ending empty
January 3, 2026 at 10:26 PM
the never ending empty
Reposted by Kellalena
okay no stop I would like off of this ride please
January 3, 2026 at 4:52 PM
okay no stop I would like off of this ride please
Reposted by Kellalena
Let's sit on the shore at the end of the world. Just you, me, an ocean full of blood, and confusing religious symbolism.
January 3, 2026 at 10:30 PM
Let's sit on the shore at the end of the world. Just you, me, an ocean full of blood, and confusing religious symbolism.
Reposted by Kellalena
Just learned the word extol, and I think everyone should praise me for my pursuit of knowledge.
January 3, 2026 at 10:55 PM
Just learned the word extol, and I think everyone should praise me for my pursuit of knowledge.
Reposted by Kellalena
I was told I sound sexy & sultry over the phone so I'm going to ride that high for awhile & never speak to anyone again.
January 2, 2026 at 11:47 PM
I was told I sound sexy & sultry over the phone so I'm going to ride that high for awhile & never speak to anyone again.
Reposted by Kellalena
This day in history. 1975. The Bustle in the Garden. In Boston thousands of Led Zeppelin fans in line overnight in the freezing cold to buy concert tickets, unconvinced that a new day will dawn for those who stand long, broke into the arena and threw a kegger.
January 3, 2026 at 9:37 AM
This day in history. 1975. The Bustle in the Garden. In Boston thousands of Led Zeppelin fans in line overnight in the freezing cold to buy concert tickets, unconvinced that a new day will dawn for those who stand long, broke into the arena and threw a kegger.
Reposted by Kellalena
I can't be held responsible for what I do when I'm sober.
January 3, 2026 at 6:49 PM
I can't be held responsible for what I do when I'm sober.
Reposted by Kellalena
Fuck it. I'm going out tonight.
I'll be back by 8:30.
I'll be back by 8:30.
December 31, 2025 at 11:13 PM
Fuck it. I'm going out tonight.
I'll be back by 8:30.
I'll be back by 8:30.
Reposted by Kellalena
I just wanna be able to have a pet cat that speaks English
I don’t think that’s too much to ask
I don’t think that’s too much to ask
January 3, 2026 at 6:27 PM
I just wanna be able to have a pet cat that speaks English
I don’t think that’s too much to ask
I don’t think that’s too much to ask
Reposted by Kellalena
Me: Ok, look. I'm only going to say this once. We've all dealt with a lot of fuckery and are in no mood for it to continue. You have one job. Do not be an arsehole. It really isn't that difficult.
2026:
2026:
January 1, 2026 at 1:38 AM
Me: Ok, look. I'm only going to say this once. We've all dealt with a lot of fuckery and are in no mood for it to continue. You have one job. Do not be an arsehole. It really isn't that difficult.
2026:
2026:
Reposted by Kellalena
"Kites tied to the arms of the gesturing at everything!" I cry lightly as I leap to battle the air between the roof and the sideyard
January 3, 2026 at 7:33 PM
"Kites tied to the arms of the gesturing at everything!" I cry lightly as I leap to battle the air between the roof and the sideyard
Reposted by Kellalena
Reposted by Kellalena
I think a little poison will make me feel better.
January 3, 2026 at 10:00 PM
I think a little poison will make me feel better.
Reposted by Kellalena
whose face can i shout at this about from 4 inches away
January 3, 2026 at 6:20 PM
whose face can i shout at this about from 4 inches away