[Sic] Burns
@sicburns2.bsky.social
Either dead Scottish poet or bored American Midwesterner, U-pick.
Do these skeets make my brain look fat?
Do these skeets make my brain look fat?
Pinned
[Sic] Burns
@sicburns2.bsky.social
· Feb 19
I’m typing stuff in here but nothing’s changing out there.
I better pick up the pace
I better pick up the pace
And while we’re at it Johnny Cougar fuck off with those paradoxical pleas to enable your dangerous masochism
January 22, 2026 at 11:56 AM
And while we’re at it Johnny Cougar fuck off with those paradoxical pleas to enable your dangerous masochism
I disapprove of what you say but I will defend to the death your right to spray it
January 22, 2026 at 11:48 AM
I disapprove of what you say but I will defend to the death your right to spray it
Reposted by [Sic] Burns
Maybe I was put here to be a living example for others who think "what would it look like if I really let myself go"
January 22, 2026 at 10:41 AM
Maybe I was put here to be a living example for others who think "what would it look like if I really let myself go"
I blame most of our problems on the teachings of Michael Jackson, especially his self-defeating insistence on our never stopping until we’ve achieved total fulfillment
January 22, 2026 at 10:46 AM
I blame most of our problems on the teachings of Michael Jackson, especially his self-defeating insistence on our never stopping until we’ve achieved total fulfillment
Reposted by [Sic] Burns
these hips plead the fifth
January 22, 2026 at 4:15 AM
these hips plead the fifth
God: I’m out of ideas with these people. Ah fuck it let’s try exploding trees
January 22, 2026 at 3:39 AM
God: I’m out of ideas with these people. Ah fuck it let’s try exploding trees
Reposted by [Sic] Burns
Please like and retweet if you're tired of people engagement posting.
January 21, 2026 at 11:28 PM
Please like and retweet if you're tired of people engagement posting.
Reposted by [Sic] Burns
are they not monsters?
January 22, 2026 at 12:08 AM
are they not monsters?
Reposted by [Sic] Burns
I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t drinking a margarita at my desk r n
January 21, 2026 at 8:50 PM
I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t drinking a margarita at my desk r n
Reposted by [Sic] Burns
My apocalypse kit brings all the boys to my yard.
January 21, 2026 at 9:06 PM
My apocalypse kit brings all the boys to my yard.
🎶And there ain’t no road just like it
Anywhere I’ve found
Just slippin on by on LSD
Friday night trouble bound🎶
Anywhere I’ve found
Just slippin on by on LSD
Friday night trouble bound🎶
January 21, 2026 at 6:35 PM
🎶And there ain’t no road just like it
Anywhere I’ve found
Just slippin on by on LSD
Friday night trouble bound🎶
Anywhere I’ve found
Just slippin on by on LSD
Friday night trouble bound🎶
Sure madam spokesmodel, he calls Greenland a “piece of ice”, much like what he calls you when you’re not in the room
January 21, 2026 at 6:24 PM
Sure madam spokesmodel, he calls Greenland a “piece of ice”, much like what he calls you when you’re not in the room
Reposted by [Sic] Burns
It's literally so mean to send me fake sugar daddy or free money scam DMs right now, be more sensitive and read the room scammers
January 21, 2026 at 5:10 PM
It's literally so mean to send me fake sugar daddy or free money scam DMs right now, be more sensitive and read the room scammers
When I say funny things in my house only a few people laugh. Look, I love my family but this is not sustainable.
January 21, 2026 at 5:16 PM
When I say funny things in my house only a few people laugh. Look, I love my family but this is not sustainable.
Reposted by [Sic] Burns
me at 20: *owns three pairs of pants*
me at 40: we need a 5th crockpot
me at 40: we need a 5th crockpot
January 20, 2026 at 6:34 AM
me at 20: *owns three pairs of pants*
me at 40: we need a 5th crockpot
me at 40: we need a 5th crockpot
How many times do you think Stephen Miller jizzed in his vampire slacks listening to daddy repeat each syphilitic racist comment he wrote about dominating the world
January 21, 2026 at 5:09 PM
How many times do you think Stephen Miller jizzed in his vampire slacks listening to daddy repeat each syphilitic racist comment he wrote about dominating the world
I just ran my own simulations and for that $15.64 I can get one decent Manhattan at a Georgetown bar after this press conference
January 21, 2026 at 4:59 PM
I just ran my own simulations and for that $15.64 I can get one decent Manhattan at a Georgetown bar after this press conference
Hey euro brothers and sisters I get it but take the “go fuck yourself” stuff to Twitter, we Bluesky folk have hated this conman asswipe since the Falkland War
January 21, 2026 at 4:29 PM
Hey euro brothers and sisters I get it but take the “go fuck yourself” stuff to Twitter, we Bluesky folk have hated this conman asswipe since the Falkland War
Will someone in the press please ask li’l speaker man what he thinks about vaginas we all need a good laugh today
January 21, 2026 at 4:20 PM
Will someone in the press please ask li’l speaker man what he thinks about vaginas we all need a good laugh today
Reposted by [Sic] Burns
if you invite me to your party I’m gonna bring you a live laugh love plaque and make you hang it on the wall in front of me so you’ll never ask me to leave my apartment and socialize ever again
January 21, 2026 at 3:51 PM
if you invite me to your party I’m gonna bring you a live laugh love plaque and make you hang it on the wall in front of me so you’ll never ask me to leave my apartment and socialize ever again
I was doing alright today but then I learned that Prue is leaving the baking show and why me goddammit why
January 21, 2026 at 4:12 PM
I was doing alright today but then I learned that Prue is leaving the baking show and why me goddammit why
I love that scene in Frankenstein where the creator tells his monster he can go fuck himself forever
January 21, 2026 at 4:04 PM
I love that scene in Frankenstein where the creator tells his monster he can go fuck himself forever
What’s this bullshit about owning books with 42 pages
January 21, 2026 at 3:48 PM
What’s this bullshit about owning books with 42 pages
Breaking: Astonished UK Scientists Watching Cow Scratch Its Back Need To Get Out More
January 21, 2026 at 3:38 PM
Breaking: Astonished UK Scientists Watching Cow Scratch Its Back Need To Get Out More
I get it Al Gore as you get older it gets harder to keep it in your lockbox
January 21, 2026 at 3:26 PM
I get it Al Gore as you get older it gets harder to keep it in your lockbox