Dan Cerinthedark
@etbeeegood.bsky.social
Disgraced former Rollerblade Champion
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:ctmnbym24srxgghbcmdynzqq/feed/aaablk4s3yrag
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:ctmnbym24srxgghbcmdynzqq/feed/aaablk4s3yrag
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
bilbos gonna baggins or whatever
February 17, 2026 at 6:17 AM
bilbos gonna baggins or whatever
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Remember to hide a list of your landlord's fears and weaknesses in your rented home for the benefit of future tenants
February 17, 2026 at 8:53 PM
Remember to hide a list of your landlord's fears and weaknesses in your rented home for the benefit of future tenants
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
which is y'all's favorite orifice for smuggling priceless jewels in?
February 18, 2026 at 12:24 AM
which is y'all's favorite orifice for smuggling priceless jewels in?
before Jolly Ranchers, kids had to suck on rocks dipped in raw cacao
February 18, 2026 at 12:41 AM
before Jolly Ranchers, kids had to suck on rocks dipped in raw cacao
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
cleaning my belly button for lint
February 17, 2026 at 6:01 PM
cleaning my belly button for lint
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Got kicked out of the gym today for setting off the smoke alarm while running in my corduroy shorts
February 17, 2026 at 9:53 PM
Got kicked out of the gym today for setting off the smoke alarm while running in my corduroy shorts
I touch grass, the grass is spaghetti and I touch it w my mouth
February 17, 2026 at 11:56 PM
I touch grass, the grass is spaghetti and I touch it w my mouth
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Webinar sounds like a mythical spider monster eating villagers who go searching caves for his silken treasures
February 17, 2026 at 9:46 PM
Webinar sounds like a mythical spider monster eating villagers who go searching caves for his silken treasures
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Don't worry about the scratches on the walls on the way to my basement. I just have a really tall cat
February 17, 2026 at 10:10 PM
Don't worry about the scratches on the walls on the way to my basement. I just have a really tall cat
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
I’ve never been held at gunpoint but I have clung to my last breath, dancing on the edge of respiratory failure to entertain my baby
February 17, 2026 at 10:18 PM
I’ve never been held at gunpoint but I have clung to my last breath, dancing on the edge of respiratory failure to entertain my baby
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
People who can stop after three chips have also never experienced a real orgasm
February 17, 2026 at 10:26 PM
People who can stop after three chips have also never experienced a real orgasm
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Talked my wife into getting a crossword tramp stamp to liven up our sex life.
February 17, 2026 at 10:43 PM
Talked my wife into getting a crossword tramp stamp to liven up our sex life.
“aRe yoU reAdy for the world’s biggest meatball?!”
No. I’m not ready. Roll that fuckin thing back on the truck I said I’m NOT READY
No. I’m not ready. Roll that fuckin thing back on the truck I said I’m NOT READY
February 17, 2026 at 11:43 PM
“aRe yoU reAdy for the world’s biggest meatball?!”
No. I’m not ready. Roll that fuckin thing back on the truck I said I’m NOT READY
No. I’m not ready. Roll that fuckin thing back on the truck I said I’m NOT READY
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
can’t. I’m pumping up the jam
February 17, 2026 at 8:00 PM
can’t. I’m pumping up the jam
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Dropping mediocre drivel into your feed with surgical precision.
February 17, 2026 at 8:35 PM
Dropping mediocre drivel into your feed with surgical precision.
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
my dad is a geek and my mom is a nerd which makes me a dork
February 17, 2026 at 8:13 PM
my dad is a geek and my mom is a nerd which makes me a dork
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
my bedside table, where my vibrator used to be, is now an almost empty bag of oyster crackers, and i’m not even lying.
February 17, 2026 at 3:46 PM
my bedside table, where my vibrator used to be, is now an almost empty bag of oyster crackers, and i’m not even lying.
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Sliding into court on my belly like a penguin.
February 17, 2026 at 7:54 AM
Sliding into court on my belly like a penguin.
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
First time seeing this, and hearing Tayler Momsen, and holy shit her voice! youtu.be/jgwshUJNbmU?...
Taylor Momsen & Soundgarden "Rusty Cage" Live | Rock Hall 2025 Induction
YouTube video by Rock & Roll Hall of Fame
youtu.be
February 17, 2026 at 8:48 AM
First time seeing this, and hearing Tayler Momsen, and holy shit her voice! youtu.be/jgwshUJNbmU?...
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Meditation turns to sleep and the sequel knows that the last thing you're going to do in a dream is meditate some more so what's next for zen. You are mindful in a theater, trying to feel pretty Zen 2 also
February 17, 2026 at 5:40 AM
Meditation turns to sleep and the sequel knows that the last thing you're going to do in a dream is meditate some more so what's next for zen. You are mindful in a theater, trying to feel pretty Zen 2 also
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
My debut romance novel, HeartWorms, is about a dashing young man that falls in love with the parasitic worms burrowing through my chest. It is semi-autobiographical so there will likely not be a sequel.
February 17, 2026 at 7:01 AM
My debut romance novel, HeartWorms, is about a dashing young man that falls in love with the parasitic worms burrowing through my chest. It is semi-autobiographical so there will likely not be a sequel.
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
searching pornhub for the vacant gaze of a disinterested woman
February 16, 2026 at 5:22 PM
searching pornhub for the vacant gaze of a disinterested woman
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
watching a baby ride a dinosaur and i’m not even high this is just sunday night for me now
February 16, 2026 at 5:09 AM
watching a baby ride a dinosaur and i’m not even high this is just sunday night for me now
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
RIP in peace atm machine in irl
February 16, 2026 at 7:39 PM
RIP in peace atm machine in irl
Reposted by Dan Cerinthedark
Ascending into my final form, lady Jesus
February 17, 2026 at 3:58 AM
Ascending into my final form, lady Jesus