strange ranger
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lithiumsucks.bsky.social
strange ranger
@lithiumsucks.bsky.social
Co-slave with @skeptyk.bsky.social of two cats.

Blah, blah, blah:
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:vpmsy4e75xl5iglu6677semw/feed/aaajlp7k4443m
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Please feed me to a carnivorous plant.
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bloody hell you taking the piss mate innit?

-me, after my 7-day free trial of BritBox
January 28, 2026 at 2:58 AM
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Everyone my age has at least one crisis tattoo you’re not special
January 28, 2026 at 3:54 AM
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pardon me, may i pet your peeve
January 26, 2026 at 8:09 PM
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We're all made up of the same cosmic microplastics
January 27, 2026 at 10:55 PM
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Nighttime anxiety has the confidence of a man explaining crypto
January 28, 2026 at 4:07 AM
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in this day in age, muscle memory is about all the memory i have
January 28, 2026 at 4:55 AM
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sometimes you have to turn the tables. other times you have to flip them.
January 26, 2026 at 1:24 PM
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me, standing over the kitchen sink with buttery grease running down my hands: “well, how do you eat your rotisserie chicken?”

friend:

me: shoves my face back in like a zombie in walking dead eating a weekly guest star
January 27, 2026 at 6:14 PM
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It’s a great day to function normally while spiralling internally.
January 24, 2026 at 7:18 PM
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Based on what I see happening in our country right now, it's time to deploy members of the National Institute of Mental Health.
January 26, 2026 at 10:47 PM
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I got two feet of snow. Makes it hard wearing socks.
January 27, 2026 at 12:54 AM
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My wife is walking around in fishnet stockings. What a hot mesh.
January 27, 2026 at 5:13 PM
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A breakroom would fix me.
January 27, 2026 at 8:58 PM
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Feeling melancholy today, I went to a new cafe where the barista asked for my order. Instead of just saying coffee, I ordered a "reason to live." She looked at me with pure disdain.

—So I got a blueberry muffin.
January 27, 2026 at 8:08 PM
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Person:: I love your personality.

Me; thanks! Which one?
January 27, 2026 at 10:29 PM
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February 2 is almost here and if the groundhog sees his shadow on a tree, it means sycamore weeks of winter.
January 27, 2026 at 10:56 PM
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So desperate for hope just seeing an evil, little man kicked to the curb brings ridiculous joy.
January 28, 2026 at 3:09 AM
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That’s it. I’m going to have to get a baby goat for my mental health.
January 28, 2026 at 2:47 AM
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and it was there, in the ruins of a mind ravaged by stress and responsibilities, she realized she’s actually killing this single mom thing
January 28, 2026 at 3:07 AM
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if sex with two people is called a twosome, and sex with three people is called a threesome, I guess I understand now why they call you handsome...

#DocAfterDark
January 28, 2026 at 3:04 AM
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You seem like someone who always loses their lighter.
January 26, 2026 at 8:31 PM
“I’d feel much worse if I wasn’t under such heavy sedation.”
January 28, 2026 at 3:03 AM
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it's rude that so many old people are the same age as me
January 27, 2026 at 5:58 PM
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[Statue of Liberty voice]: give me your shitposts, your pet photos, your art projects longing to be seen
January 27, 2026 at 9:28 PM
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he snuggle his fishy
January 28, 2026 at 2:05 AM