Discount Storytime
@discountstorytime.com
The "Discount Storytime" podcast provides weekly absurd short stories to make you laugh. Enjoy!
Good News! Today a jury acquitted me on almost all charges of badger smuggling!
December 31, 2025 at 12:13 AM
Good News! Today a jury acquitted me on almost all charges of badger smuggling!
Reposted by Discount Storytime
“You’re condescending” That’s your stupid little opinion
December 30, 2025 at 5:09 PM
“You’re condescending” That’s your stupid little opinion
Reposted by Discount Storytime
probably because they have to keep stopping to pick up their backpacks
December 30, 2025 at 2:20 PM
probably because they have to keep stopping to pick up their backpacks
Reposted by Discount Storytime
You are under no obligation to make sense in a world that does not make sense.
December 30, 2025 at 3:43 PM
You are under no obligation to make sense in a world that does not make sense.
Reposted by Discount Storytime
my new theory is that once you have a certain amount of money and wealth you start to go crazy and detach from reality. that number is different for everyone. for me it's $20
April 2, 2025 at 4:38 PM
my new theory is that once you have a certain amount of money and wealth you start to go crazy and detach from reality. that number is different for everyone. for me it's $20
December 30, 2025 at 2:53 PM
Reposted by Discount Storytime
Hate freeloaders who join in the New Year's Eve countdown for the last 10 seconds. I've been doing this all year. Where were you back in May
December 30, 2025 at 11:32 AM
Hate freeloaders who join in the New Year's Eve countdown for the last 10 seconds. I've been doing this all year. Where were you back in May
December 30, 2025 at 12:47 PM
Ruin two bands by combining them:
Twisted Sister Sledge
Twisted Sister Sledge
Ruin two bands by combining them:
Insane ABBA Clown Posse
Insane ABBA Clown Posse
December 30, 2025 at 12:35 PM
Ruin two bands by combining them:
Twisted Sister Sledge
Twisted Sister Sledge
Lot’s wife made a big mistake by looking back and turning in to a pillar of salt. But I think her bigger mistake was keeping her day job as a lifeguard.
December 29, 2025 at 11:30 PM
Lot’s wife made a big mistake by looking back and turning in to a pillar of salt. But I think her bigger mistake was keeping her day job as a lifeguard.
Reposted by Discount Storytime
as the prophecy foretold
December 29, 2025 at 1:56 PM
as the prophecy foretold
Reposted by Discount Storytime
Please share this post. I have made a deal with the devil where he will turn me back into a slug if I get 100,000 followers on here. I miss being a slug. I did not have to pay taxes. I had no idea who Katy Perry was. I slithered around aimlessly, not knowing salt would make me die a horrific death.
December 29, 2025 at 8:58 PM
Please share this post. I have made a deal with the devil where he will turn me back into a slug if I get 100,000 followers on here. I miss being a slug. I did not have to pay taxes. I had no idea who Katy Perry was. I slithered around aimlessly, not knowing salt would make me die a horrific death.
December 29, 2025 at 2:46 PM
This cold dry air is getting to me. Anyone else feel like they are constantly moisturizing their teeth?
December 29, 2025 at 2:15 PM
This cold dry air is getting to me. Anyone else feel like they are constantly moisturizing their teeth?
Reposted by Discount Storytime
That's rough.
December 29, 2025 at 1:27 PM
That's rough.
December 29, 2025 at 1:28 PM
Reposted by Discount Storytime
is it put one foot in front of the other, it’s put one foot in front of the other isn’t it
December 28, 2025 at 1:33 PM
is it put one foot in front of the other, it’s put one foot in front of the other isn’t it
Reposted by Discount Storytime
I don’t run very often but when I do it’s roughshod.
November 18, 2025 at 10:01 PM
I don’t run very often but when I do it’s roughshod.
Reposted by Discount Storytime
how about you yabba dabba don’t
December 28, 2025 at 2:54 AM
how about you yabba dabba don’t
Reposted by Discount Storytime
"WTF is wrong with you?"
ME: I know. Right?
ME: I know. Right?
December 29, 2025 at 12:45 PM
"WTF is wrong with you?"
ME: I know. Right?
ME: I know. Right?
Reposted by Discount Storytime
Reposted by Discount Storytime
I would like to graduate from regular sitcom mom to animated sitcom mom
December 27, 2025 at 4:49 PM
I would like to graduate from regular sitcom mom to animated sitcom mom