Chestbursty
@chestrovert.bsky.social
1. Be excellent to each other
2. Party on dudes
Mine: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:dlm76unvjc5an7kn56z6j4ds/feed/aaab3oaymtk2g
My care bear stares: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:dlm76unvjc5an7kn56z6j4ds/feed/aaad7aufcmm3c
2. Party on dudes
Mine: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:dlm76unvjc5an7kn56z6j4ds/feed/aaab3oaymtk2g
My care bear stares: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:dlm76unvjc5an7kn56z6j4ds/feed/aaad7aufcmm3c
Pinned
Chestbursty
@chestrovert.bsky.social
· Apr 5
"Your laugh is like a sunset," I say right before I nail gun my hand to the frame of a revolving door
Reposted by Chestbursty
If you can buy your detachable penis back for $17 that's actually a pretty good value
December 27, 2025 at 2:47 AM
If you can buy your detachable penis back for $17 that's actually a pretty good value
Reposted by Chestbursty
x-rated modems tell baudy jokes
December 27, 2025 at 2:53 AM
x-rated modems tell baudy jokes
Reposted by Chestbursty
the sexual tension between me and watching all the shows on prime that only have one season available for free
December 27, 2025 at 1:02 AM
the sexual tension between me and watching all the shows on prime that only have one season available for free
Reposted by Chestbursty
Not to be controversial but I think we should use tools and resources to make people's lives less miserable instead of more
December 27, 2025 at 12:17 AM
Not to be controversial but I think we should use tools and resources to make people's lives less miserable instead of more
Reposted by Chestbursty
ME: i just want to feel safe
OTHER BANK ROBBER: no you also have to open it
OTHER BANK ROBBER: no you also have to open it
December 27, 2025 at 12:16 AM
ME: i just want to feel safe
OTHER BANK ROBBER: no you also have to open it
OTHER BANK ROBBER: no you also have to open it
Reposted by Chestbursty
i come from a long line of sailors and my father was very stern (never set foot on the bow)
December 26, 2025 at 11:37 PM
i come from a long line of sailors and my father was very stern (never set foot on the bow)
Reposted by Chestbursty
It was the evening after
And all through the house
We were back to being morose
And listening to Bauhaus
And all through the house
We were back to being morose
And listening to Bauhaus
December 27, 2025 at 2:12 AM
It was the evening after
And all through the house
We were back to being morose
And listening to Bauhaus
And all through the house
We were back to being morose
And listening to Bauhaus
Reposted by Chestbursty
Boxing day is when we jump in a big box and get shipped to our preferred destinations. Don't forget the airholes and snacks this time.
December 26, 2025 at 6:00 PM
Boxing day is when we jump in a big box and get shipped to our preferred destinations. Don't forget the airholes and snacks this time.
Reposted by Chestbursty
i have it on good authority that good authority no longer exists
December 27, 2025 at 2:12 AM
i have it on good authority that good authority no longer exists
Reposted by Chestbursty
Reposted by Chestbursty
Most people who say "I'm bad with names" mean they can't remember them. But I'm bad with names in another way. Anyway, meet my son Dipshit
December 12, 2025 at 4:59 PM
Most people who say "I'm bad with names" mean they can't remember them. But I'm bad with names in another way. Anyway, meet my son Dipshit
Reposted by Chestbursty
I bet the teenage mutant ninja turtles smelled like absolute shit
September 27, 2024 at 2:13 AM
I bet the teenage mutant ninja turtles smelled like absolute shit
Reposted by Chestbursty
i finally got a book about chronometry, it's about time
December 27, 2025 at 1:03 AM
i finally got a book about chronometry, it's about time
Reposted by Chestbursty
28 BBLs later: society collapses thanks to a plague of undead butts
At 61 years old, I had lost volume and wanted my younger body back quickly. Donor fat seemed like the best option.
I Got My BBL From a Cadaver
At 61 years old, I had lost volume and wanted my younger body back quickly. Donor fat seemed like the best option.
www.thecut.com
December 26, 2025 at 11:52 PM
28 BBLs later: society collapses thanks to a plague of undead butts
Reposted by Chestbursty
how do i become a librarian
December 27, 2025 at 1:50 AM
how do i become a librarian
Reposted by Chestbursty
Ebenezer Snoozy Floofenstein III
December 27, 2025 at 1:33 AM
Ebenezer Snoozy Floofenstein III
Reposted by Chestbursty
They call them pill bugs, but I've taken like six and I'm still not feeling anything.
December 27, 2025 at 1:51 AM
They call them pill bugs, but I've taken like six and I'm still not feeling anything.
Reposted by Chestbursty
Ok so boyfriend 3D printed living room furniture for the rats and then my best friend’s mom made us a beautiful quilt plus a little rat-sized quilt.
December 25, 2025 at 5:55 PM
Ok so boyfriend 3D printed living room furniture for the rats and then my best friend’s mom made us a beautiful quilt plus a little rat-sized quilt.
Reposted by Chestbursty
Reposted by Chestbursty
ME: who called em fish boobs instead of shark hooteries
WIFE: no one. no one ever says any of those things
WIFE: no one. no one ever says any of those things
December 26, 2025 at 4:26 PM
ME: who called em fish boobs instead of shark hooteries
WIFE: no one. no one ever says any of those things
WIFE: no one. no one ever says any of those things
Reposted by Chestbursty
I’m at the “hold my moobs when I go down the stairs” level now. Get at me
December 21, 2025 at 4:56 AM
I’m at the “hold my moobs when I go down the stairs” level now. Get at me
Reposted by Chestbursty
Reposted by Chestbursty
did you see these tidings, bro. they're not good. they're mid at best. they brought me mid tidings bro
December 26, 2025 at 7:45 PM
did you see these tidings, bro. they're not good. they're mid at best. they brought me mid tidings bro
Reposted by Chestbursty
Reposted by Chestbursty
I must alert the farmer we are out of bodies for the hogs
December 26, 2025 at 9:41 PM
I must alert the farmer we are out of bodies for the hogs