@infntjest.bsky.social
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FRIEND WHO I HAVEN'T SEEN IN A WHILE: your kid's gotten so big! what is he, four?
ME: i have no idea what he's for
ME: i have no idea what he's for
February 16, 2026 at 8:37 PM
FRIEND WHO I HAVEN'T SEEN IN A WHILE: your kid's gotten so big! what is he, four?
ME: i have no idea what he's for
ME: i have no idea what he's for
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When redheads charge toward you fast enough they become blueheads
February 16, 2026 at 11:00 PM
When redheads charge toward you fast enough they become blueheads
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How to build a nested list
1) Start like this
A) Then do this
Bird: I live here now
2) Make sure to get the bird out
Bird: NO
1) Start like this
A) Then do this
Bird: I live here now
2) Make sure to get the bird out
Bird: NO
March 12, 2025 at 12:41 AM
How to build a nested list
1) Start like this
A) Then do this
Bird: I live here now
2) Make sure to get the bird out
Bird: NO
1) Start like this
A) Then do this
Bird: I live here now
2) Make sure to get the bird out
Bird: NO
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Jeez it’s only one day after Valentine’s Day and the stores already have their Ides of March stuff out on display
February 15, 2026 at 12:04 PM
Jeez it’s only one day after Valentine’s Day and the stores already have their Ides of March stuff out on display
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kids these days don't know how to impress Jodie Foster
January 9, 2026 at 3:56 AM
kids these days don't know how to impress Jodie Foster
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🔊 4'33" (Kidz Bop version)
December 31, 2025 at 8:11 AM
🔊 4'33" (Kidz Bop version)
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My boss: so how's our fourth quarter looking?
Me, the sales manager at the company that makes inflatable frog suits: well, you're never going to believe this, but
Me, the sales manager at the company that makes inflatable frog suits: well, you're never going to believe this, but
October 10, 2025 at 7:36 PM
My boss: so how's our fourth quarter looking?
Me, the sales manager at the company that makes inflatable frog suits: well, you're never going to believe this, but
Me, the sales manager at the company that makes inflatable frog suits: well, you're never going to believe this, but
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We are thrilled to announce that our NEW Large Language Model will be released on 11.18.25.
October 1, 2025 at 2:38 PM
We are thrilled to announce that our NEW Large Language Model will be released on 11.18.25.
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When I first heard about Stockholm Syndrome, it sounded awful, but now I love it.
October 10, 2025 at 5:56 PM
When I first heard about Stockholm Syndrome, it sounded awful, but now I love it.
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no one ever comes back
August 3, 2025 at 9:09 PM
no one ever comes back
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The worm talking with his friends of why he hangs out with early bird: “he just gets me, guys”
July 28, 2025 at 12:57 AM
The worm talking with his friends of why he hangs out with early bird: “he just gets me, guys”
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Me:
The other guy in the yard:
Me:
Other guy:
Me:
Third guy (walking up):
Me:
Other guy:
Third guy:
Me: You here for the--
Other guy: Milkshake yeah
Third guy: Yeah the milkshake
Me: Yeah
The other guy in the yard:
Me:
Other guy:
Me:
Third guy (walking up):
Me:
Other guy:
Third guy:
Me: You here for the--
Other guy: Milkshake yeah
Third guy: Yeah the milkshake
Me: Yeah
May 27, 2025 at 10:50 PM
Me:
The other guy in the yard:
Me:
Other guy:
Me:
Third guy (walking up):
Me:
Other guy:
Third guy:
Me: You here for the--
Other guy: Milkshake yeah
Third guy: Yeah the milkshake
Me: Yeah
The other guy in the yard:
Me:
Other guy:
Me:
Third guy (walking up):
Me:
Other guy:
Third guy:
Me: You here for the--
Other guy: Milkshake yeah
Third guy: Yeah the milkshake
Me: Yeah
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bringing a naïf to a gun fight
May 25, 2025 at 11:53 PM
bringing a naïf to a gun fight
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[tipping hat to a raccoon]
M'rabies
M'rabies
May 15, 2025 at 11:48 PM
[tipping hat to a raccoon]
M'rabies
M'rabies
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JD Vance killed the pope because he supported Opus DEI
April 21, 2025 at 11:53 PM
JD Vance killed the pope because he supported Opus DEI
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Randy Newman's "Political Science" is even funnier now that he looks like Henry Kissinger singing it.
youtu.be/405xgQTlbwU?...
youtu.be/405xgQTlbwU?...
Randy Newman - Political Science (Live on 'Everybody’s Live With John Mulaney')
YouTube video by Randy Newman
youtu.be
April 18, 2025 at 10:58 PM
Randy Newman's "Political Science" is even funnier now that he looks like Henry Kissinger singing it.
youtu.be/405xgQTlbwU?...
youtu.be/405xgQTlbwU?...
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i have forgotten
the moon's name
it is awkward
i try not to look
up at the sky
i pretend i
don't see
the moon
hanging there
right above me
the moon's name
it is awkward
i try not to look
up at the sky
i pretend i
don't see
the moon
hanging there
right above me
April 12, 2025 at 2:10 AM
i have forgotten
the moon's name
it is awkward
i try not to look
up at the sky
i pretend i
don't see
the moon
hanging there
right above me
the moon's name
it is awkward
i try not to look
up at the sky
i pretend i
don't see
the moon
hanging there
right above me
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Welcome to Super Villain University. Please refer to the enclosed packet for a sample course offering:
April 6, 2025 at 1:29 AM
Welcome to Super Villain University. Please refer to the enclosed packet for a sample course offering:
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me: i'll have a Coke
waiter: is Pepsi okay?
me: no, still in that coma
waiter: oh my god
me: i know, it's terrible
waiter: it's so terrible
me: and Pepsi has kids too those poor kids
waiter: i don't even want to think about it
waiter: is Pepsi okay?
me: no, still in that coma
waiter: oh my god
me: i know, it's terrible
waiter: it's so terrible
me: and Pepsi has kids too those poor kids
waiter: i don't even want to think about it
March 7, 2025 at 8:22 PM
me: i'll have a Coke
waiter: is Pepsi okay?
me: no, still in that coma
waiter: oh my god
me: i know, it's terrible
waiter: it's so terrible
me: and Pepsi has kids too those poor kids
waiter: i don't even want to think about it
waiter: is Pepsi okay?
me: no, still in that coma
waiter: oh my god
me: i know, it's terrible
waiter: it's so terrible
me: and Pepsi has kids too those poor kids
waiter: i don't even want to think about it
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Just looked at my hand and realised I forgot to give back somebody's nose. Can't even remember whose it was now
August 30, 2024 at 9:09 PM
Just looked at my hand and realised I forgot to give back somebody's nose. Can't even remember whose it was now
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I have so many chronicles of narnia fans trapped in my wardrobe
January 31, 2025 at 3:39 AM
I have so many chronicles of narnia fans trapped in my wardrobe
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Great job on bluesky this week everyone, let's circle back to that new joke format Monday and maybe reach out to some new accounts to meet those growth targets
January 31, 2025 at 12:27 PM
Great job on bluesky this week everyone, let's circle back to that new joke format Monday and maybe reach out to some new accounts to meet those growth targets
