Grant Tanaka
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granttanaka.bsky.social
Grant Tanaka
@granttanaka.bsky.social
I wrote a joke about a potato once
bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaai5k54haeh6
life is hard and will continue to be so, but live music will always be therapy. PS: the pit at a Die Spitz show ain’t nothing to fuck with (omg my kids are in there somewhere)
October 18, 2025 at 3:49 AM
Taking a break for awhile to try to figure out if anything matters anymore. Please be good to each other and don't drink the stuff under the sink while I'm gone ok 🤙
October 9, 2025 at 3:06 PM
don't judge a man 'til you've walked a mile in his shoes all the way to the courthouse where you put on a black robe and get your gavel and tell the bailiff to bring in the next defendant and hear their testimony and make a decision by fairly interpreting and applying the law and
October 8, 2025 at 8:20 PM
Reposted by Grant Tanaka
Blair Witch Bespoke Artisanal Crafts
October 7, 2025 at 10:13 PM
Reposted by Grant Tanaka
autocorrect keeps changing but to bit and in to I and at this point I don't believe it has any interest in being helpful and is just trying to be a massive prick
October 8, 2025 at 6:30 AM
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is british trader joe’s tradeur joues
October 8, 2025 at 2:40 AM
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Go go gadget get-out-of-my-way
October 7, 2025 at 1:41 AM
Reposted by Grant Tanaka
Literally everyone misuses the word literally.
October 6, 2025 at 1:00 PM
Reposted by Grant Tanaka
Auto-correct changed "social" media to "sociopath" media, and it's not wrong
September 19, 2025 at 1:04 AM
Reposted by Grant Tanaka
What you can only imagine does not pay for reality. That's what I always wrote on the memo line of all my checks, because back then it was time to stop saying I can only imagine to foolish dreams with tales of cashing blank stares at any bank wall
October 8, 2025 at 4:43 AM
Reposted by Grant Tanaka
I cut my own hair because:
(a) I am poor
(b) I am cheap
(c) I am antisocial
(d) I don't like people touching me
(e) All the above
October 8, 2025 at 1:33 PM
Reposted by Grant Tanaka
The dental hygienist cleans my teeth to the sounds of the unbelievably old songs of my youth.
October 7, 2025 at 8:25 PM
Reposted by Grant Tanaka
Listen, if you have to explain your joke, I am sorry that it's not something else that we have in common.
October 8, 2025 at 4:31 PM
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Oh, you mean fall as in autumn, not as in "of civilization."
October 8, 2025 at 3:26 PM
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October 5, 2025 at 4:17 AM
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Rule of thumb is if a dude asks what you want to eat, then gets himself food and walks off you get to shoot him in the back. Cold blood. It's a little something called justice.
October 6, 2025 at 4:06 PM
Reposted by Grant Tanaka
The only reason stores put xmas shit out this early is to distract you from the Epstein Files.
October 6, 2025 at 3:14 PM
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We take back our country for all our people, or we’re not taking back the country we need.
October 8, 2025 at 9:09 AM
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I guess if everything falls apart, I can always shitpost at Costco.
October 8, 2025 at 5:48 PM
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Everything I do, I do it for you*

*coping mechanism
October 7, 2025 at 9:25 PM
Reposted by Grant Tanaka
why would you put yourself in that position, is a question i ask myself every time i have sex . folks,,
October 8, 2025 at 2:39 PM
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waiter: would you like some capers with your pasta

batman: what
October 7, 2025 at 6:16 PM
Reposted by Grant Tanaka
If I were involved in providing professional alteration services, I’m pretty sure I’d name my business to reflect my quick turnaround and cultural relevance and call it TAILOR: SWIFT.
October 8, 2025 at 6:21 PM
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"For my wellness journey" I murmur as I pour a 2lb bag of M&Ms over my face
October 8, 2025 at 7:29 PM
Reposted by Grant Tanaka
if you look in the mirror & say the words aioli sauce three times in a row a man riding a flux capacitor powered fixed gear bike will zoom by at 88 miles per hour & bonk you in the head with a hardcover copy of jonathan livingston seagull.
October 8, 2025 at 3:10 PM