Fixins’ Bar
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fixinsbar.bsky.social
Fixins’ Bar
@fixinsbar.bsky.social
just here to enjoy your skeets and occasionally say something stupid

https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:n4krsiwraux7ckj7bba2thnc/feed/aaah7fnwybaui
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Gently posting and deleting like dipping my toe into a swimming pool.
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If your situation is good and you’re sad, then yeah. You’re depressed.

But if your situation sucks and you’re sad, then you’re situationally aware.

Fix that shit and shine, cupcake.
November 20, 2025 at 2:19 AM
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making a glitter bomb with my body hair
November 19, 2025 at 5:19 PM
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Welp..The title of my memior.
November 19, 2025 at 2:06 AM
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an app that lets you know when a new dog moves into the neighborhood
November 18, 2025 at 8:56 PM
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It would be nice if everyone around here was looking at the same picture huh
November 18, 2025 at 2:09 PM
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Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, said no one ever.
November 18, 2025 at 4:11 AM
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They're called stockbrokers because you gradually become broker than when you started.
November 18, 2025 at 4:24 AM
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I want you to fuck off (gradually moving hands further apart) thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis much
November 18, 2025 at 4:31 AM
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[on a date] ringworm is literally EVERYWHERE in the environment
November 18, 2025 at 4:49 AM
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me: *smashing guitar on stage*

guy playing jean valjean: bro wtf it's my soliloquy
November 18, 2025 at 12:15 PM
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If you ever feel like a sad sack of meat, remember that you're also a badass spooky skeleton just rattling around town!
November 18, 2025 at 12:20 PM
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Before you sit down, make sure you can reach the remote.
November 18, 2025 at 12:25 PM
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My revenge body is just my regular body full of diarrhea
November 18, 2025 at 12:39 PM
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It's not true love unless you can unabashedly talk about the consistency of your bowl movement.
November 18, 2025 at 12:58 PM
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I'm not really a praying man but I pray Jason Voorhees eventually finds the rest of his goalie gear
November 18, 2025 at 1:09 PM
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Binge breathing.
November 18, 2025 at 5:20 AM
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my father was a famous pepperoni salesman
November 17, 2025 at 4:56 AM
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You’re telling me a banana made this bread?
November 17, 2025 at 5:01 AM
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I don’t get why we say “sleep tight.” I’m sleeping loose, floppy, and aggressively horizontal.
November 17, 2025 at 3:45 AM
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It was only embarrassingly recently that I realized the song Coconut wasn't describing a turducken type situation.
November 16, 2025 at 4:37 PM
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a lint catcher for my belly button
November 16, 2025 at 1:31 AM
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just cut off a cybertruck on the freeway, for all of us
November 15, 2025 at 5:02 PM
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When people ask why I eat my peas with a knife, I tell them that it's a Julie thing. It makes sense because that's my name.
November 15, 2025 at 1:51 AM
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laser ham therapy
November 13, 2025 at 5:22 AM
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it’s probably cringe to call something cringe by now actually
November 13, 2025 at 12:55 AM