bacon popsicle 🥃
@gupton68.bsky.social
quis est iste qui venit?
the man, the myth, the bellend
my BS bs: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:3bnoyda3i7sv7k6p3vzmjtvj/feed/aaadqbbtnlfxy
my top bs: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:3bnoyda3i7sv7k6p3vzmjtvj/feed/aaahguixerquo
the man, the myth, the bellend
my BS bs: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:3bnoyda3i7sv7k6p3vzmjtvj/feed/aaadqbbtnlfxy
my top bs: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:3bnoyda3i7sv7k6p3vzmjtvj/feed/aaahguixerquo
Pinned
bacon popsicle 🥃
@gupton68.bsky.social
· Dec 11
What I like most about BlueSky is how on twitter I always felt like I was an outsider looking in and I do here too, so it really feels just like home.
Reposted by bacon popsicle 🥃
Alcohol may not solve all life’s problems but conducting an in-depth investigation just to be sure is a hill I’m prepared to die on.
November 30, 2025 at 2:46 PM
Alcohol may not solve all life’s problems but conducting an in-depth investigation just to be sure is a hill I’m prepared to die on.
Reposted by bacon popsicle 🥃
I once told my wife I thought the hardest thing about having an affair would be keeping up the deceit but she just laughed and said finding someone else prepared to have sex with me would be a far greater challenge.
June 6, 2024 at 12:28 PM
I once told my wife I thought the hardest thing about having an affair would be keeping up the deceit but she just laughed and said finding someone else prepared to have sex with me would be a far greater challenge.
Reposted by bacon popsicle 🥃
Nothing quite prepares you for the first time you overhear your 15 year old daughter explaining to her grandmother what teabagging is.
October 30, 2023 at 3:44 PM
Nothing quite prepares you for the first time you overhear your 15 year old daughter explaining to her grandmother what teabagging is.
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Nothing can prepare you for the disappointment you feel on discovering that a Venus Fly Trap is too small to help you dispose of the corpse.
July 22, 2025 at 11:55 AM
Nothing can prepare you for the disappointment you feel on discovering that a Venus Fly Trap is too small to help you dispose of the corpse.
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I reserve the right to be interested in anything that interests me
November 30, 2025 at 4:51 PM
I reserve the right to be interested in anything that interests me
Reposted by bacon popsicle 🥃
[first date]
WAITER: is everything okay here
ME: *throws chair* why is the word “big” smaller than the word “small”
DATE: *flips table* why is the word “long” shorter than the word “short”
*we kiss*
WAITER: is everything okay here
ME: *throws chair* why is the word “big” smaller than the word “small”
DATE: *flips table* why is the word “long” shorter than the word “short”
*we kiss*
November 26, 2025 at 4:41 PM
[first date]
WAITER: is everything okay here
ME: *throws chair* why is the word “big” smaller than the word “small”
DATE: *flips table* why is the word “long” shorter than the word “short”
*we kiss*
WAITER: is everything okay here
ME: *throws chair* why is the word “big” smaller than the word “small”
DATE: *flips table* why is the word “long” shorter than the word “short”
*we kiss*
Reposted by bacon popsicle 🥃
My criticism of you is always constructive.
Your criticism of me is always rude, wrong and unwelcome.
Have we got that straight?
Your criticism of me is always rude, wrong and unwelcome.
Have we got that straight?
November 29, 2025 at 2:25 PM
My criticism of you is always constructive.
Your criticism of me is always rude, wrong and unwelcome.
Have we got that straight?
Your criticism of me is always rude, wrong and unwelcome.
Have we got that straight?
Reposted by bacon popsicle 🥃
No no no babe… the pocket protector stays on during sex
November 30, 2025 at 8:08 PM
No no no babe… the pocket protector stays on during sex
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my name is yuri, i post like crap
guess it's 'bout time i install this app
guess it's 'bout time i install this app
November 30, 2025 at 6:59 AM
my name is yuri, i post like crap
guess it's 'bout time i install this app
guess it's 'bout time i install this app
Reposted by bacon popsicle 🥃
I can make all your wishes come true, I threatened.
November 30, 2025 at 5:34 PM
I can make all your wishes come true, I threatened.
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Mama told me not to come
- Sigmund Freud
- Sigmund Freud
November 25, 2025 at 11:48 PM
Mama told me not to come
- Sigmund Freud
- Sigmund Freud
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the old videos of the great cabbage patch kids frenzy of 1983 are fucking hilarious
it’s not hilarious that I have actual memory from it
it’s not hilarious that I have actual memory from it
November 30, 2025 at 12:25 PM
the old videos of the great cabbage patch kids frenzy of 1983 are fucking hilarious
it’s not hilarious that I have actual memory from it
it’s not hilarious that I have actual memory from it
Reposted by bacon popsicle 🥃
If you know what you're doing then know it quietly, I'm trying to make an outline for a step by step subjectivity I can believe in over here
November 30, 2025 at 8:08 PM
If you know what you're doing then know it quietly, I'm trying to make an outline for a step by step subjectivity I can believe in over here
Reposted by bacon popsicle 🥃
*placing a civic in the manger* happy honda days
December 10, 2024 at 12:36 PM
*placing a civic in the manger* happy honda days
Reposted by bacon popsicle 🥃
*launches a pie rescue for all unwanted pie
November 27, 2025 at 3:27 AM
*launches a pie rescue for all unwanted pie
Reposted by bacon popsicle 🥃
Therapist: have you ever stopped to think-
Me: no
Me: no
November 30, 2025 at 7:58 PM
Therapist: have you ever stopped to think-
Me: no
Me: no
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PSA: no one here owes you anything, including pics or a response to your DM. So blocking someone because they won’t post a pic you want just shows how your fragile little ego is and says way more about you than them. Now back to shitposting.
November 30, 2025 at 3:03 PM
PSA: no one here owes you anything, including pics or a response to your DM. So blocking someone because they won’t post a pic you want just shows how your fragile little ego is and says way more about you than them. Now back to shitposting.
Reposted by bacon popsicle 🥃
a watched pot never boils that's why i just microwave it and peak through the window. oh boy look at those sparks this is way cooler than bubbles.
November 30, 2025 at 6:22 PM
a watched pot never boils that's why i just microwave it and peak through the window. oh boy look at those sparks this is way cooler than bubbles.
Reposted by bacon popsicle 🥃
Bought new strings, got the motivation to change my strings, can’t find my strings
November 30, 2025 at 4:27 PM
Bought new strings, got the motivation to change my strings, can’t find my strings
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thanksgiving sharing:
i’m thankful for gummies that make it possible for me to sit here calmly with all of you
i’m thankful for gummies that make it possible for me to sit here calmly with all of you
November 29, 2025 at 4:40 PM
thanksgiving sharing:
i’m thankful for gummies that make it possible for me to sit here calmly with all of you
i’m thankful for gummies that make it possible for me to sit here calmly with all of you
Reposted by bacon popsicle 🥃
Known idiot is surprised to learn that she is in fact, an idiot.
November 29, 2025 at 7:44 PM
Known idiot is surprised to learn that she is in fact, an idiot.
Reposted by bacon popsicle 🥃
So now I guess we have to attempt living through that Christmas stuff, huh?
November 30, 2025 at 7:51 AM
So now I guess we have to attempt living through that Christmas stuff, huh?
Reposted by bacon popsicle 🥃
Me: Alexa, fix me.
Alexa: I'm sorry, you are a desicated husk of something that once resembled a human being. You can only be fixed by renewing your Amazon Prime subscription. Would you like me to renew your subscription? Make a gurgling sound if you agree to our new terms and conditions.
Alexa: I'm sorry, you are a desicated husk of something that once resembled a human being. You can only be fixed by renewing your Amazon Prime subscription. Would you like me to renew your subscription? Make a gurgling sound if you agree to our new terms and conditions.
May 26, 2025 at 7:55 PM
Me: Alexa, fix me.
Alexa: I'm sorry, you are a desicated husk of something that once resembled a human being. You can only be fixed by renewing your Amazon Prime subscription. Would you like me to renew your subscription? Make a gurgling sound if you agree to our new terms and conditions.
Alexa: I'm sorry, you are a desicated husk of something that once resembled a human being. You can only be fixed by renewing your Amazon Prime subscription. Would you like me to renew your subscription? Make a gurgling sound if you agree to our new terms and conditions.
Reposted by bacon popsicle 🥃
i’m not mentally or gastrointestinally stable
August 19, 2025 at 4:12 AM
i’m not mentally or gastrointestinally stable
Reposted by bacon popsicle 🥃
No, I didn’t just hear the theme song for Greatest American Hero there is something in my eye ok.
January 27, 2025 at 1:04 AM
No, I didn’t just hear the theme song for Greatest American Hero there is something in my eye ok.