crabby daddy dave
@crabbydaddy.bsky.social
crabbydacrab from twitter
<something witty>
mildly amusing musings when high
we have one race: human. be kind. 🏳️🌈
<something witty>
mildly amusing musings when high
we have one race: human. be kind. 🏳️🌈
Pinned
Sometimes I feel as if we’re all Schrodinger's cat.
if im tired 2 days in a row am i retired?
February 1, 2026 at 10:49 PM
if im tired 2 days in a row am i retired?
Reposted by crabby daddy dave
Sorry I don't interact with your posts anymore it's just that I've convinced myself you hate me
January 30, 2026 at 10:33 PM
Sorry I don't interact with your posts anymore it's just that I've convinced myself you hate me
Reposted by crabby daddy dave
I have a swollen tastebud. Please kill me.
February 1, 2026 at 10:18 PM
I have a swollen tastebud. Please kill me.
Reposted by crabby daddy dave
I fear Crocheting Bluesky more than any other group. They are vicious.
February 1, 2026 at 8:53 PM
I fear Crocheting Bluesky more than any other group. They are vicious.
Reposted by crabby daddy dave
Ask your doctor if pharmaceutical grade grilled cheese sandwiches are right for you.
January 26, 2026 at 4:15 AM
Ask your doctor if pharmaceutical grade grilled cheese sandwiches are right for you.
Reposted by crabby daddy dave
it's just me and my laughable lack of sleep against the world
February 1, 2026 at 9:19 PM
it's just me and my laughable lack of sleep against the world
Reposted by crabby daddy dave
let’s eat mall pretzels and watch 80’s flicks
February 1, 2026 at 5:25 PM
let’s eat mall pretzels and watch 80’s flicks
Reposted by crabby daddy dave
For being as nice as I am, I sure say “grow a pair” a lot to people.
February 1, 2026 at 1:09 PM
For being as nice as I am, I sure say “grow a pair” a lot to people.
Reposted by crabby daddy dave
At that point in my life where I have to search my own skeets to see if I am repeating myself, and then searching to see if I am repeating someone. Else's skeets.
This fucking feels like work.
This fucking feels like work.
January 30, 2026 at 4:17 PM
At that point in my life where I have to search my own skeets to see if I am repeating myself, and then searching to see if I am repeating someone. Else's skeets.
This fucking feels like work.
This fucking feels like work.
Reposted by crabby daddy dave
Before you say you hate this timeline, keep in mind that there are still plenty of asteroids out there.
February 1, 2026 at 12:39 AM
Before you say you hate this timeline, keep in mind that there are still plenty of asteroids out there.
if hamburgers want help
they need to first help themselves
they need to first help themselves
February 1, 2026 at 10:15 PM
if hamburgers want help
they need to first help themselves
they need to first help themselves
Reposted by crabby daddy dave
*seductively recedes into the nothingness
January 31, 2026 at 1:05 AM
*seductively recedes into the nothingness
Reposted by crabby daddy dave
Pretty sure my therapist just muttered “this bitch” under her breath
January 30, 2026 at 10:36 PM
Pretty sure my therapist just muttered “this bitch” under her breath
Reposted by crabby daddy dave
Them: What’s bsky like?
Me: It’s like if a butthole, a pizza, someone’s pets
and depression walked into
a bar
Me: It’s like if a butthole, a pizza, someone’s pets
and depression walked into
a bar
February 1, 2026 at 9:05 PM
Them: What’s bsky like?
Me: It’s like if a butthole, a pizza, someone’s pets
and depression walked into
a bar
Me: It’s like if a butthole, a pizza, someone’s pets
and depression walked into
a bar
you bore
i snore
i snore
February 1, 2026 at 10:05 PM
you bore
i snore
i snore
high (damp, moist) january is officially over!
February 1, 2026 at 9:56 PM
high (damp, moist) january is officially over!
leftover fries with frozen chopped onions - or onion salt if amazon delivered the wrong item - make great hash browns
follow for more single guy recipes
follow for more single guy recipes
February 1, 2026 at 6:15 PM
leftover fries with frozen chopped onions - or onion salt if amazon delivered the wrong item - make great hash browns
follow for more single guy recipes
follow for more single guy recipes
full of chocolate and bad choices
February 1, 2026 at 4:23 PM
full of chocolate and bad choices
Reposted by crabby daddy dave
I’m living the good life, in which I wake up at 7:00 AM to find dried icing on my phone screen from my 1:00 AM cinnamon roll and doom scroll session
February 1, 2026 at 1:27 PM
I’m living the good life, in which I wake up at 7:00 AM to find dried icing on my phone screen from my 1:00 AM cinnamon roll and doom scroll session
Reposted by crabby daddy dave
Just once I would like to put a whole fish in my mouth and pull out a perfectly intact skeleton. Is it too much to ask?
February 1, 2026 at 2:53 PM
Just once I would like to put a whole fish in my mouth and pull out a perfectly intact skeleton. Is it too much to ask?
Reposted by crabby daddy dave
I'm not sure why some people become so mean when they drink alcohol. When I get drunk all I want to do is get naked & eat tacos.
February 1, 2026 at 1:27 PM
I'm not sure why some people become so mean when they drink alcohol. When I get drunk all I want to do is get naked & eat tacos.
we don’t hear about as many rascals as we used to
February 1, 2026 at 3:32 PM
we don’t hear about as many rascals as we used to
Reposted by crabby daddy dave
Pronunciation-wise, February is the Wednesday of months
February 1, 2026 at 2:36 PM
Pronunciation-wise, February is the Wednesday of months
Reposted by crabby daddy dave
This is all because those Brady kids messed with that tiki in Hawaii.
January 17, 2026 at 9:40 PM
This is all because those Brady kids messed with that tiki in Hawaii.
Reposted by crabby daddy dave
eating chocolate because fuck February
February 1, 2026 at 2:26 PM
eating chocolate because fuck February