Shitposts In Tiaras
@shitpostsintiaras.bsky.social
Fancy trophy account. When you see one of these collectable tiara posts, click on the original post inside and repost it. That's how they get their royalties.
Pinned
If you ever nominate something and nothing happens then quote posts and comments have been disabled and we all agreed to just quietly walk away with the money
Did you just say in flight boobie 🏆👑 Congratulations @unfitz.bsky.social from @jimstewart.bsky.social
Sex is never a good idea when flying internationally because if you’re over a metric country they won’t let you in the Mile High Club.
February 12, 2026 at 2:34 AM
Did you just say in flight boobie 🏆👑 Congratulations @unfitz.bsky.social from @jimstewart.bsky.social
You really wanna get rid of all those squeaks though? What are you gonna laugh at 🏆👑 Congratulations @jimstewart.bsky.social from @klaybourne.bsky.social
WD-40 but(t) in suppository form. When ya just gotta chase that stubborn fucker out.
February 11, 2026 at 5:00 PM
You really wanna get rid of all those squeaks though? What are you gonna laugh at 🏆👑 Congratulations @jimstewart.bsky.social from @klaybourne.bsky.social
Starring Danny Trejo as Muffchete 🏆👑 Congratulations @daddyjew.bsky.social from @klaybourne.bsky.social
February 11, 2026 at 3:37 PM
Starring Danny Trejo as Muffchete 🏆👑 Congratulations @daddyjew.bsky.social from @klaybourne.bsky.social
This is why it's important to put the post button on before you even get in that folder 🏆👑 Congratulations @paintedsky.ca from @deviwestside.bsky.social
actually on bluesky we don’t call them drafts we call them precum
February 11, 2026 at 4:04 AM
This is why it's important to put the post button on before you even get in that folder 🏆👑 Congratulations @paintedsky.ca from @deviwestside.bsky.social
🎶dun dun dun, dun, dun dun prettybird, prettybird 🎶 Congratulations @kristenwixx.bsky.social and Mr Phelps from @onedogsopinion.bsky.social
Good morning, Mr. Phelps. Your mission, should you choose to accept it...
February 11, 2026 at 3:58 AM
🎶dun dun dun, dun, dun dun prettybird, prettybird 🎶 Congratulations @kristenwixx.bsky.social and Mr Phelps from @onedogsopinion.bsky.social
Is the person hanging on sitting on the couch? Greg is fucking yolked and a bit of a playboy 🏆👑 Congratulations @gregthemiller.bsky.social from @jollyrobber.bsky.social 🏴☠️
hang on i have an idea (drags couch into the shower)
February 11, 2026 at 3:44 AM
Is the person hanging on sitting on the couch? Greg is fucking yolked and a bit of a playboy 🏆👑 Congratulations @gregthemiller.bsky.social from @jollyrobber.bsky.social 🏴☠️
"Hey Chuck it's Marvin. Your cousin, Marvin Berry. You know that new sophistication you're looking for?"🏆👑 Congratulations @funkelly.bsky.social from @cosmicclau.bsky.social
“and then this motherfucker puts a FEATHER in his CAP, and you are not gonna believe what he called that shit. guess. just fuckin guess.”
February 11, 2026 at 3:39 AM
"Hey Chuck it's Marvin. Your cousin, Marvin Berry. You know that new sophistication you're looking for?"🏆👑 Congratulations @funkelly.bsky.social from @cosmicclau.bsky.social
Replied "amen" to this post but nobody liked it so I deleted my account and came back after I ate something 🏆👑 Congratulations @weeder.bsky.social from @jimstewart.bsky.social
Start your day with a reply
Let your worries pass you by
But if you post and then delete
All day long regret the skeet
Let your worries pass you by
But if you post and then delete
All day long regret the skeet
February 11, 2026 at 3:21 AM
Replied "amen" to this post but nobody liked it so I deleted my account and came back after I ate something 🏆👑 Congratulations @weeder.bsky.social from @jimstewart.bsky.social
Just in time, drafts can also be used as a towel 🏆👑 Congratulations @jimstewart.bsky.social from @runswindows95.bsky.social
"Like ropes on a facial, these are the skeets of our lives..."
February 11, 2026 at 2:22 AM
Just in time, drafts can also be used as a towel 🏆👑 Congratulations @jimstewart.bsky.social from @runswindows95.bsky.social
Quote posts are disabled but congratulations @missriss.bsky.social from @popeawesomexiii.bsky.social you clearly went 88 mph with this one 🏆👑
February 10, 2026 at 4:17 AM
Quote posts are disabled but congratulations @missriss.bsky.social from @popeawesomexiii.bsky.social you clearly went 88 mph with this one 🏆👑
You're very forward. But my car is actually that way so can you steer us backwards 🏆👑 Congratulations @minxymisty.bsky.social from @jollyrobber.bsky.social 🏴☠️
February 9, 2026 at 8:43 PM
You're very forward. But my car is actually that way so can you steer us backwards 🏆👑 Congratulations @minxymisty.bsky.social from @jollyrobber.bsky.social 🏴☠️
As long as there's roadkill in the world his hair will never die 🏆👑 Congratulations @chalza.bsky.social from @coachmark25.bsky.social
ABC News anchor Ted Koppel turns 86 Sunday. He says he'd like to hang around for a Koppel more years.
February 8, 2026 at 7:19 PM
As long as there's roadkill in the world his hair will never die 🏆👑 Congratulations @chalza.bsky.social from @coachmark25.bsky.social
The law offices of Leiber and Stoller will hound dog him into oblivion 🏆👑 Congratulations @thinlyveiledpanda.bsky.social from @jollyrobber.bsky.social 🏴☠️
My husband is threatening divorce if I don’t stop quoting Elvis lyrics at him. I’m all shook up.
February 8, 2026 at 7:15 PM
The law offices of Leiber and Stoller will hound dog him into oblivion 🏆👑 Congratulations @thinlyveiledpanda.bsky.social from @jollyrobber.bsky.social 🏴☠️
Hiding inside the horsey sauce packets, tiny cowboys 🏆👑 Congratulations @brickmahoney.bsky.social from @jimstewart.bsky.social
[Arby's drive-thru]
(muffled voice from deep inside Trojan horse): ask for extra horsey sauce
(muffled voice from deep inside Trojan horse): ask for extra horsey sauce
February 8, 2026 at 5:25 PM
Hiding inside the horsey sauce packets, tiny cowboys 🏆👑 Congratulations @brickmahoney.bsky.social from @jimstewart.bsky.social
Rotissicuffs! At the squishmallows bin 🏆👑 Congratulations @sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social from @ashhull.bsky.social
putting a rotisserie chicken on each hand and boxing people at costco
February 7, 2026 at 10:30 PM
Rotissicuffs! At the squishmallows bin 🏆👑 Congratulations @sixfeetofcandy.bsky.social from @ashhull.bsky.social
Just gonna chew on this for awhile in my roomy decent person pants 🏆👑 Congratulations @los-los.bsky.social from @uffdada.bsky.social
this is my rifle
this is my gun
pants are so tight
there’s no room for my gum
this is my gun
pants are so tight
there’s no room for my gum
February 7, 2026 at 8:13 PM
Just gonna chew on this for awhile in my roomy decent person pants 🏆👑 Congratulations @los-los.bsky.social from @uffdada.bsky.social
Suspenders Made Out Of Bones Man solemnly walks out of Wendy's 🏆👑 Congratulations @shutupmikeginn.bsky.social from @tamethestallion.bsky.social
People think the highest Michelin rating is 3 stars, but there is a hidden 4th level where the Michelin Man comes and kills everyone at your restaurant and mixes your ashes in tire rubber. Then he exalts you by wearing you around his waist for all eternity
February 7, 2026 at 4:25 AM
Suspenders Made Out Of Bones Man solemnly walks out of Wendy's 🏆👑 Congratulations @shutupmikeginn.bsky.social from @tamethestallion.bsky.social
When they put empath for the devil in their bio 🤘🏆👑 Congratulations @whatsjo.bsky.social from @jollyrobber.bsky.social 🏴☠️
him (a man of wealth and taste): please allow me to introduce myself.
me (puzzled by the nature of his game): woo woo
me (puzzled by the nature of his game): woo woo
February 7, 2026 at 3:57 AM
When they put empath for the devil in their bio 🤘🏆👑 Congratulations @whatsjo.bsky.social from @jollyrobber.bsky.social 🏴☠️
If you see one on twister swipe left then through your legs then over your head 🏆👑 Congratulations @chalza.bsky.social from @runswindows95.bsky.social
Avoid sex with contortionists. They can be twisted fucks.
February 7, 2026 at 1:20 AM
If you see one on twister swipe left then through your legs then over your head 🏆👑 Congratulations @chalza.bsky.social from @runswindows95.bsky.social
Polka Your Things, we can squeeze out anybody 🏆👑 Congratulations @gupton68.bsky.social from @cosmicclau.bsky.social
Hire an accordionist to start playing at family gatherings when you want to signal the guests it’s time for them to leave.
February 7, 2026 at 1:13 AM
Polka Your Things, we can squeeze out anybody 🏆👑 Congratulations @gupton68.bsky.social from @cosmicclau.bsky.social
People for the ethical unrequited love of merry go round animals 🏆👑 Congratulations @tuskjenkins.bsky.social from @2tickytacky.bsky.social
Missed carousel boarding: you were the dolphin with a saddle, I didn't even know they made those. And I just choked from opposable thumb awe in my blowhole
February 6, 2026 at 10:37 PM
People for the ethical unrequited love of merry go round animals 🏆👑 Congratulations @tuskjenkins.bsky.social from @2tickytacky.bsky.social
The herbst thing that I would do is jim in my croce 🏆👑 Congratulations @lyse.bsky.social from @therealscotchtape.bsky.social
Could you save thyme in a bottle?
February 6, 2026 at 8:49 PM
The herbst thing that I would do is jim in my croce 🏆👑 Congratulations @lyse.bsky.social from @therealscotchtape.bsky.social
The kitchen of tomorrow was always this bleak 🏆👑 Congratulations @handjobjones.bsky.social from @popeawesomexiii.bsky.social
Went to an antiques mall yesterday. Made sure to leave everything better than I found it.
February 6, 2026 at 7:29 PM
The kitchen of tomorrow was always this bleak 🏆👑 Congratulations @handjobjones.bsky.social from @popeawesomexiii.bsky.social
Why don't you lift skeez nuts 🏆👑 Congratulations @sicburns2.bsky.social from @twosense.bsky.social
Turns out “Wind Beneath My Wings” is really about a ski-jumper serenading his crotch
February 6, 2026 at 5:23 PM
Why don't you lift skeez nuts 🏆👑 Congratulations @sicburns2.bsky.social from @twosense.bsky.social
Who has a zamboner right now 🏆👑 Congratulations @tonytula.com from @los-los.bsky.social
who called it Heated Rivalry and not Fuck Ice
February 6, 2026 at 5:20 PM
Who has a zamboner right now 🏆👑 Congratulations @tonytula.com from @los-los.bsky.social