C 🇨🇦
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coffeeinhand.bsky.social
C 🇨🇦
@coffeeinhand.bsky.social
Chief cat wrangler. Coffee connoisseur. Horror Enthusiast.

Hot Garbage: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:brt3y4qbhsywu3m3tzg4hucr/feed/aaab5occtum4g
Reposted by C 🇨🇦
can mosquitos smell farts
October 10, 2025 at 4:23 AM
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I'm refusing to use Mastodon solely due to its dumb fucking name.
October 7, 2025 at 10:53 AM
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I can’t explain it but Jewel sings in cursive
October 10, 2025 at 3:02 AM
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you haven’t deleted your account and come back 3 hours later in a while… you good?
October 9, 2025 at 2:16 PM
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Verbal sparring and other simple pleasures.
July 8, 2025 at 7:19 PM
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Let's go play on the swings. I'll give you an underduck
September 1, 2025 at 3:27 AM
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Many say they want the hooba, and then complain about the stank.
October 2, 2025 at 4:50 PM
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I've been researching colanders all day, and I feel strained.
October 13, 2025 at 12:36 AM
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Spending time on the ‘Discover’ feed just to feel something
October 13, 2025 at 12:23 AM
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I'm going to buy a dog and tell it all of my problems
October 12, 2025 at 10:12 PM
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if we made it directly at source, all grilled cheeses would be grilled steaks
October 12, 2025 at 10:46 PM
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Never become so old in your soul that your heart forgets how to laugh.
October 6, 2025 at 12:27 PM
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Autocorrect automatically adds imaginary when I type "friend."
October 12, 2025 at 12:15 PM
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Rage Against the Muh Peen
October 12, 2025 at 8:51 PM
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Farting on your straw man until it bursts into flames
October 12, 2025 at 8:38 PM
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My car needs to get ahold of itself- my engine isn’t the only thing around here that needs serviced, so it’s going to have to wait its turn
October 12, 2025 at 6:10 AM
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Brain damage is probably my most endearing quality.
October 10, 2025 at 9:08 AM
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giving neurotic mess a run for its money
October 10, 2025 at 11:09 AM
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Just ate a piece of fruit as though staying alive is worth while.
October 8, 2025 at 2:28 PM
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[at stoplight]

*gets out of car, knocks on driver's window behind me after following me for 3 turns*

Me: Are you obsessed with me?
October 10, 2025 at 10:03 PM
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This is like a high school party that gets busted by the cops and no one knows whose house to go to and dammit I threw out my four loko
October 11, 2025 at 12:30 AM
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I surprise others by not being a pushover.
October 12, 2025 at 1:27 AM
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i got the taint of a bad toot in my mouth so came here to gargle some skeet, hope it works
October 12, 2025 at 10:47 AM
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My emotional support pickle just told me to stop eating my feelings
October 11, 2025 at 10:52 PM