tyches
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phatvsauce.bsky.social
tyches
@phatvsauce.bsky.social
the best borat impressionist you know (he/they)
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Yoru and Aoba are surprised, but Uni stays composed… the strongest, as always
January 10, 2026 at 8:46 PM
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hurt people hurt people.
December 9, 2024 at 10:00 PM
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[To the tune of 'Wouldn't It Be Nice' by The Beach Boys]

🎵Wouldn't it be nice
🎵To eat a Minion
🎵Holding up a towel to hide from god
🎵And wouldn't it be nice
🎵Though quite forbidden
🎵Savouring the yellow flesh of Bob
November 22, 2024 at 10:32 AM
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no one talk to me until ive had my morning bowl of chicken alfredo
November 22, 2024 at 1:40 PM
do you guys think rfk jr. is anti-vax because his dad got shot
November 21, 2024 at 1:41 AM
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nom nom froot loops
November 19, 2024 at 10:35 AM
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It's possible that Jerry Jones will die before ever again feeling happiness. Which is fine.
November 19, 2024 at 4:26 AM
still on the hunt for the clown that hides from gay people
November 19, 2024 at 3:20 AM
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Biden Authorizes Ukraine To Use Long-Range Weapons On Him
Biden Authorizes Ukraine To Use Long-Range Weapons On Him
‘I’m Ready, Man,’ Declares Weary President WASHINGTON—Explaining that this represented the end of the line and he simply wished to go out with a bang, President Joe Biden announced Monday that he had ...
theonion.com
November 18, 2024 at 8:33 PM
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mahomes won a super bowl straight up, then he almost won one with no o-line, then he won one on one leg, then he won one with receivers who'd never seen a football before, now he's trying to win one while throwing a horrifyingly dumb pick every game. he's trying to win football on every balatro deck
November 17, 2024 at 9:34 PM
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everything is romantic
November 17, 2024 at 9:45 PM
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you think a football counts as a vegetable? i don't
November 17, 2024 at 8:59 PM
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very hot tip: if you see this shit in the store buy it. it’s peak refreshment. mixes perfectly with gin if you’re into that kind of thing. i get it at aldi but imagine it’s elsewhere

this isnt a sponsored post but it was made out of personal self interest, because if they stop making it i will kms
November 17, 2024 at 6:24 PM
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typa shit i'm on
November 17, 2024 at 3:57 PM
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doc loaded me up with ant tranquilizers im speeeding down the highway
November 17, 2024 at 5:32 PM
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bro just checking in you've been really quiet for a while but the horns just took your leitmotif away from the woodwinds.
November 17, 2024 at 5:46 AM
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man goes to doctor. says he’s depressed. says he doesn’t want to live anymore. doctor says, “big zoo just went up for sale. lots of animals. might make you feel better if you bought it.”

“but doctor,” says matt damon,
November 17, 2024 at 12:59 AM
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i keep myself 5 seconds away from orgasm at all times in case of emergencies
November 17, 2024 at 1:35 AM
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THE PYRAMIDS HAVE BEEN ACTIVATED!!!!!!!
November 17, 2024 at 5:15 AM
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November 16, 2024 at 4:43 PM
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ok u can start jacking off again thank u for waiting
November 16, 2024 at 11:27 PM
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you dont want to kerfuffle with me bro
November 16, 2024 at 11:39 PM
she jala on my peño til i popp 'er
November 16, 2024 at 11:00 PM