Paul Clements
@clemoppaul.bsky.social
Reposted by Paul Clements
enoch burke: my life and career ruined, just for standing up to the tyranny of woke and defending christian values in a world gone sorely mad
jeevacation@gmail.com: yuor'e right,, send me scool addres
jeevacation@gmail.com: yuor'e right,, send me scool addres
November 20, 2025 at 4:46 PM
enoch burke: my life and career ruined, just for standing up to the tyranny of woke and defending christian values in a world gone sorely mad
jeevacation@gmail.com: yuor'e right,, send me scool addres
jeevacation@gmail.com: yuor'e right,, send me scool addres
Reposted by Paul Clements
Okay, that's a good start. Now release the Kelly Rowland Excel Spreadsheets.
November 13, 2025 at 9:46 AM
Okay, that's a good start. Now release the Kelly Rowland Excel Spreadsheets.
Reposted by Paul Clements
Russia presented its human-like AI robot. It fell down as it walked onto the stage.
November 11, 2025 at 6:19 PM
Russia presented its human-like AI robot. It fell down as it walked onto the stage.
Reposted by Paul Clements
Him: where are all the coffee filters?
Me:
Me:
June 6, 2025 at 3:25 PM
Him: where are all the coffee filters?
Me:
Me:
Reposted by Paul Clements
[repeating myself louder in the haunted house attraction] did the dracula throw water on anyone else’s pants??
October 27, 2025 at 8:17 PM
[repeating myself louder in the haunted house attraction] did the dracula throw water on anyone else’s pants??
Reposted by Paul Clements
Running for office and revealing a giant back tattoo that just says WOMEN. Nobody can agree if it's good or bad
October 22, 2025 at 6:57 PM
Running for office and revealing a giant back tattoo that just says WOMEN. Nobody can agree if it's good or bad
Reposted by Paul Clements
Learned that an anonymous outside expert on submersibles did an interview with the OceanGate Titan investigation, and they released a transcript, with all the names redacted. The first line of his first answer? "I'm sure you're familiar with my film Titanic."
October 16, 2025 at 9:28 PM
Learned that an anonymous outside expert on submersibles did an interview with the OceanGate Titan investigation, and they released a transcript, with all the names redacted. The first line of his first answer? "I'm sure you're familiar with my film Titanic."
Reposted by Paul Clements
Reposted by Paul Clements
😭
IG newberlinlibrary
IG newberlinlibrary
October 6, 2025 at 7:52 AM
😭
IG newberlinlibrary
IG newberlinlibrary
Reposted by Paul Clements
Next level rice cooker.
August 29, 2025 at 9:14 PM
Next level rice cooker.
Reposted by Paul Clements
Reposted by Paul Clements
is that what i think it is
August 26, 2025 at 8:38 PM
is that what i think it is
Reposted by Paul Clements
A jury of my peers? TWELVE murderers?!
August 26, 2025 at 1:30 AM
A jury of my peers? TWELVE murderers?!
Reposted by Paul Clements
Stop scrolling, weary traveler, and rest for a moment
June 30, 2025 at 9:34 PM
Stop scrolling, weary traveler, and rest for a moment
Reposted by Paul Clements
Patient, sobbing: But Doctor, I AM Pagliacci!
ChatGPT: Apologies. I didn't realise when recommending Pagliacci's epic show to cure your depression that you were the genius himself. I'm impressed! With regards to your initial question, I can recommend seeing the Great Clown Pagliacci.
ChatGPT: Apologies. I didn't realise when recommending Pagliacci's epic show to cure your depression that you were the genius himself. I'm impressed! With regards to your initial question, I can recommend seeing the Great Clown Pagliacci.
August 7, 2025 at 11:31 AM
Patient, sobbing: But Doctor, I AM Pagliacci!
ChatGPT: Apologies. I didn't realise when recommending Pagliacci's epic show to cure your depression that you were the genius himself. I'm impressed! With regards to your initial question, I can recommend seeing the Great Clown Pagliacci.
ChatGPT: Apologies. I didn't realise when recommending Pagliacci's epic show to cure your depression that you were the genius himself. I'm impressed! With regards to your initial question, I can recommend seeing the Great Clown Pagliacci.
Reposted by Paul Clements
I hate being bald and walking the same direction as another bald guy. It looks like we’re being summoned by our king
August 1, 2025 at 8:02 PM
I hate being bald and walking the same direction as another bald guy. It looks like we’re being summoned by our king
Reposted by Paul Clements
Reposted by Paul Clements
Check out my gourmet sausage e-commerce website. I’ll send you a link.
June 5, 2025 at 1:58 PM
Check out my gourmet sausage e-commerce website. I’ll send you a link.
Reposted by Paul Clements
Tattoo Artist: Sure you don't want me to remove the whole tat?
Me: No, just the 2 at the end
Tattoo Artist: So you want it to say ‘Paul Blart: Mall Cop’?
Me: No, just the 2 at the end
Tattoo Artist: So you want it to say ‘Paul Blart: Mall Cop’?
July 23, 2025 at 3:17 AM
Tattoo Artist: Sure you don't want me to remove the whole tat?
Me: No, just the 2 at the end
Tattoo Artist: So you want it to say ‘Paul Blart: Mall Cop’?
Me: No, just the 2 at the end
Tattoo Artist: So you want it to say ‘Paul Blart: Mall Cop’?
Reposted by Paul Clements
I’m petrified about today’s science news. Genetically modifying crabs to have cheetah genes? This could go sideways fast.
July 8, 2025 at 9:45 AM
I’m petrified about today’s science news. Genetically modifying crabs to have cheetah genes? This could go sideways fast.
Reposted by Paul Clements
Me: Uh, green field?
Test Admin: Sorry, another cold steel rail.
Test Admin: Sorry, another cold steel rail.
March 25, 2025 at 12:13 AM
Me: Uh, green field?
Test Admin: Sorry, another cold steel rail.
Test Admin: Sorry, another cold steel rail.
Reposted by Paul Clements
If this time travel experiment works, I should be able to go from here and now and reappea—
—r about here.
It worked!! Ahah!
Of course, I can't reveal any of what will happen, to avoid paradoxes.
Sorry.
I'll just act normal.
It worked!! Ahah!
Of course, I can't reveal any of what will happen, to avoid paradoxes.
Sorry.
I'll just act normal.
April 25, 2025 at 12:32 AM
If this time travel experiment works, I should be able to go from here and now and reappea—
Reposted by Paul Clements
“Our autopsy found the Holy Father had a substantial amount of Eucharist in his system— roughly four times the legal limit—at the time of death,” said Fernando Ruini
theonion.com/vatican...
theonion.com/vatican...
Vatican Coroner Confirms Eucharistic Overdose
VATICAN CITY—In a stunning discovery that revealed the full extent of the pontiff’s addiction, Vatican coroner Fernando Ruini released a report Thursday confirming Pope Francis died of a eucharistic overdose. “Our autopsy found the Holy Father had a substantial amount of Eucharist in his system— roughly four times the legal limit—at the time of death,” […]
theonion.com
April 25, 2025 at 12:30 AM
“Our autopsy found the Holy Father had a substantial amount of Eucharist in his system— roughly four times the legal limit—at the time of death,” said Fernando Ruini
theonion.com/vatican...
theonion.com/vatican...
Reposted by Paul Clements
English major comics
November 18, 2024 at 4:49 AM
English major comics