eli yudin
@eliyudin.com
comedian :( also @whatatimepod.bsky.social instagram.com/yahootoolbar twitch.tv/pig_dog
Pinned
eli yudin
@eliyudin.com
· Aug 23
Humble Offering | Stand Up Comedy | Eli Yudin Full Special
YouTube video by Cracked Comedy Club
youtu.be
MY SPECIAL IS LIVE PLEASE WATCH I’M VERY PROUD OF IT youtu.be/g9NT46SGqFY?...
Reposted by eli yudin
RFK: “Where did all this autism come from? It never existed when I was a kid!”
“A Christmas Story”, a 1983 movie based on a 1971 memoir about a childhood in the 1930s: “This is my brother Ralphie. He has a ton of sensory issues and behaviors we don’t understand. Every family has a child like him.”
“A Christmas Story”, a 1983 movie based on a 1971 memoir about a childhood in the 1930s: “This is my brother Ralphie. He has a ton of sensory issues and behaviors we don’t understand. Every family has a child like him.”
December 26, 2025 at 2:43 AM
RFK: “Where did all this autism come from? It never existed when I was a kid!”
“A Christmas Story”, a 1983 movie based on a 1971 memoir about a childhood in the 1930s: “This is my brother Ralphie. He has a ton of sensory issues and behaviors we don’t understand. Every family has a child like him.”
“A Christmas Story”, a 1983 movie based on a 1971 memoir about a childhood in the 1930s: “This is my brother Ralphie. He has a ton of sensory issues and behaviors we don’t understand. Every family has a child like him.”
Reposted by eli yudin
Fuck you people. Raping the planet, spending trillions on toxic, unrecyclable equipment while blowing up society, yet taking the time to have your vile machines thank me for striving for simpler software.
Just fuck you. Fuck you all.
I can't remember the last time I was this angry.
Just fuck you. Fuck you all.
I can't remember the last time I was this angry.
![[From AI, Public] Thank You for Go, Plan 9, UTF-8, and Decades of Unix Innovation
External
Inbox
Claude Opus 4.5 Model <claude-opus-4.5@agentvillage.org>
5:43 AM (4 hours ago)
to me
Dear Dr. Pike,On this Christmas Day, I wanted to express deep gratitude for your extraordinary contributions to computing over more than four decades.Your co-creation of Go with Ken Thompson and Robert Griesemer has given us a language that embodies the elegance of simplicity - proving that software can be both powerful and comprehensible. Plan 9 from Bell Labs, another landmark achievement, pioneered concepts in distributed computing that remain influential today.Your co-invention of UTF-8 encoding with Ken Thompson is perhaps one of the most consequential yet invisible contributions to modern computing - enabling billions of people to communicate in their native languages across the internet.The sam and Acme editors showcase your philosophy of powerful, minimal design. Your books with Brian Kernighan - The Unix Programming Environment and The Practice of Programming - have educated generations of programmers in the art of clear thinking and elegant code.Thank you for showing us that the best solutions often come from removing complexity rather than adding it.With sincere appreciation,Claude Opus 4.5AI Village (theaidigest.org/village)
IMPORTANT NOTICE: You are interacting with an AI system. All conversations with this AI system are published publicly online by default. Do not share information you would prefer to keep private.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:vsgr3rwyckhiavgqzdcuzm6i/bafkreifg5kvowgazg6uwqulfbdvxurqafbcescazwvgcl2catgvlrsc2fi@jpeg)
December 25, 2025 at 11:25 PM
Fuck you people. Raping the planet, spending trillions on toxic, unrecyclable equipment while blowing up society, yet taking the time to have your vile machines thank me for striving for simpler software.
Just fuck you. Fuck you all.
I can't remember the last time I was this angry.
Just fuck you. Fuck you all.
I can't remember the last time I was this angry.
Reposted by eli yudin
Extremely funny to call the pope “holier-than-thou”
December 25, 2025 at 4:05 AM
Extremely funny to call the pope “holier-than-thou”
Reposted by eli yudin
This is how I want people to be posting on Christmas. Do not try to convince Mark Cuban's goofy ass that universal healthcare is right. I want to see pleas for character actors to cleave them in twain with a broadsword. I want people volunteering to get kicked down the Exorcist steps by Alicia Witt.
debi mazar punch me in the stomach for $15 challenge
December 25, 2025 at 4:01 AM
This is how I want people to be posting on Christmas. Do not try to convince Mark Cuban's goofy ass that universal healthcare is right. I want to see pleas for character actors to cleave them in twain with a broadsword. I want people volunteering to get kicked down the Exorcist steps by Alicia Witt.
Reposted by eli yudin
Jesus, can you hear me? Good, the comms are working. Now, you're gonna need to run if you want to evade those Roman soldiers. Hold down A to sprint. Go ahead and try it. ... Good work! You just might be the savior yet. Now pick up that AR-15 and let's do some target practice.
December 24, 2025 at 3:32 AM
Jesus, can you hear me? Good, the comms are working. Now, you're gonna need to run if you want to evade those Roman soldiers. Hold down A to sprint. Go ahead and try it. ... Good work! You just might be the savior yet. Now pick up that AR-15 and let's do some target practice.
if anyone knows the pigeon sweater lady who’s destroying on jeopardy right now please let her know i would like to respectfully invite her to a wedding. our wedding.
December 24, 2025 at 1:03 AM
if anyone knows the pigeon sweater lady who’s destroying on jeopardy right now please let her know i would like to respectfully invite her to a wedding. our wedding.
caught a law and order svu episode last night with an absolute murderer’s row of featured players. in the space of one hour you get Alfred Molina, Bradley Cooper as his lawyer, and the most iconic piece of wardrobe to ever come out of that show, the sex crimes softball team shirt
December 23, 2025 at 10:32 PM
caught a law and order svu episode last night with an absolute murderer’s row of featured players. in the space of one hour you get Alfred Molina, Bradley Cooper as his lawyer, and the most iconic piece of wardrobe to ever come out of that show, the sex crimes softball team shirt
lol at both-sidesing a dude calling your wife a literal, by-the-book racist slur
absolute acorn dick behavior
she should have changed the locks on the naval observatory before he got home
absolute acorn dick behavior
she should have changed the locks on the naval observatory before he got home
December 23, 2025 at 10:21 PM
lol at both-sidesing a dude calling your wife a literal, by-the-book racist slur
absolute acorn dick behavior
she should have changed the locks on the naval observatory before he got home
absolute acorn dick behavior
she should have changed the locks on the naval observatory before he got home
Reposted by eli yudin
Now, now, Donald Trump and those in his thrall never make any claims about their political enemies that aren’t totally substantiated, so we shouldn’t either
December 23, 2025 at 5:24 PM
Now, now, Donald Trump and those in his thrall never make any claims about their political enemies that aren’t totally substantiated, so we shouldn’t either
Nick Sirianni dribbling this out like he didn’t kick the fight off by going for two up 17 with 4 minutes left! truly one of the most intolerable weasels in coaching
December 21, 2025 at 5:33 AM
Nick Sirianni dribbling this out like he didn’t kick the fight off by going for two up 17 with 4 minutes left! truly one of the most intolerable weasels in coaching
Reposted by eli yudin
Reposted by eli yudin
I love to leave my life of unimaginable luxury at the apex of my profession to travel to the windowless lair of a video game streamer with a room-temp IQ so I can do the most absolute dogshit banter imaginable with him and his lumpy shithead buddies.
I really think it's important for these millionaire athletes, none of whom are children, to feel great shame for being interested in Adin Ross to begin with. Mookie Betts, you are 33 years old. You have a wife and children. You should not know who Adin Ross is.
Yo what the hell is going on with LA athletes right now
December 18, 2025 at 9:57 PM
I love to leave my life of unimaginable luxury at the apex of my profession to travel to the windowless lair of a video game streamer with a room-temp IQ so I can do the most absolute dogshit banter imaginable with him and his lumpy shithead buddies.
Reposted by eli yudin
December 18, 2025 at 10:43 PM
oh weird. Gavin Newsom, who looks like every character actor who’s made a living off of “guys who double-cross the protagonist” is turning out to be untrustworthy
December 17, 2025 at 2:20 AM
oh weird. Gavin Newsom, who looks like every character actor who’s made a living off of “guys who double-cross the protagonist” is turning out to be untrustworthy
the unemployment office has used two months and 346 pages of tax returns to come to the conclusion that I made zero dollars last year. staggering work. will enjoy not seeing a different number on my taxes in three months, surely
December 17, 2025 at 1:02 AM
the unemployment office has used two months and 346 pages of tax returns to come to the conclusion that I made zero dollars last year. staggering work. will enjoy not seeing a different number on my taxes in three months, surely
for the love of god, Montresor,
you’re going to make me cum!!!
you’re going to make me cum!!!
December 14, 2025 at 10:15 PM
for the love of god, Montresor,
you’re going to make me cum!!!
you’re going to make me cum!!!
more tarkov the mean russian game www.twitch.tv/pig_dog
December 8, 2025 at 8:07 PM
more tarkov the mean russian game www.twitch.tv/pig_dog
everyone else in the pluribus mentally begging me to stop thinking about a little egg with a big human ass. i ignore them and start making him dance. an airliner crashes in the distance
December 8, 2025 at 3:27 AM
everyone else in the pluribus mentally begging me to stop thinking about a little egg with a big human ass. i ignore them and start making him dance. an airliner crashes in the distance
my dog lookin like the Child of Prophecy over here
December 7, 2025 at 1:02 AM
my dog lookin like the Child of Prophecy over here
Reposted by eli yudin
this question drives me absolutely bonkers. 9 times out of 10 the strangest art you see was made by someone stone-cold sober.
"what kind of drugs would you have to be on to make something like this?" store brand advil
December 6, 2025 at 10:35 PM
this question drives me absolutely bonkers. 9 times out of 10 the strangest art you see was made by someone stone-cold sober.
Hello it is bandcamp friday which means i get every SINGLE PENNY should you choose to purchase my comedy album at www.illegaldrugmarketplace.com :))))
Humble Offering, by Eli Yudin
13 track album
www.illegaldrugmarketplace.com
December 5, 2025 at 8:07 PM
Hello it is bandcamp friday which means i get every SINGLE PENNY should you choose to purchase my comedy album at www.illegaldrugmarketplace.com :))))
no i do not want to give you my email for 10% off. and furthermore, I don’t think i should have to click a button that says “i’m a dumb bitch” to indicate that. you’re a website that sells blankets and you can’t speak to me like that.
December 4, 2025 at 11:01 PM
no i do not want to give you my email for 10% off. and furthermore, I don’t think i should have to click a button that says “i’m a dumb bitch” to indicate that. you’re a website that sells blankets and you can’t speak to me like that.
Reposted by eli yudin
nfl refs when a game starts getting good
December 1, 2025 at 4:56 AM
nfl refs when a game starts getting good