Optimist Primus
@optimistprimus.bsky.social
I deleted my account years ago, but some people claim they still see my posts
Don't read these after midnight:
bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaagbiuaqzqpg
Don't read these after midnight:
bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaagbiuaqzqpg
Pinned
Life is beauty wrapped in a nightmare. And I'm just chipping away at the shell, looking for that creamy center.
Reposted by Optimist Primus
One of the many reasons AI can't produce good writing is it can't hate its own writing. It can't think to itself "Maybe I'm illiterate" during the writing process. And that's essential
December 9, 2025 at 8:45 PM
One of the many reasons AI can't produce good writing is it can't hate its own writing. It can't think to itself "Maybe I'm illiterate" during the writing process. And that's essential
Reposted by Optimist Primus
Never mix up italy with a black hole just because you think you hear spaghetti vacation
December 13, 2025 at 6:25 PM
Never mix up italy with a black hole just because you think you hear spaghetti vacation
Reposted by Optimist Primus
Some of the signs you might be turning to ash in the wind is a sudden feeling of weightlessness and fragmentation. These symptoms are also associated with crumbling to dust so be sure to check with your physician
December 13, 2025 at 5:36 AM
Some of the signs you might be turning to ash in the wind is a sudden feeling of weightlessness and fragmentation. These symptoms are also associated with crumbling to dust so be sure to check with your physician
Reposted by Optimist Primus
I understand that a lot of folks have been misled by fear-mongering and powerful regressive voices but it’s still astonishing to me that so many have fallen for the idea that oppressively policing other people’s gender identity and expression could in any way be part of an enlightened future.
December 13, 2025 at 5:49 PM
I understand that a lot of folks have been misled by fear-mongering and powerful regressive voices but it’s still astonishing to me that so many have fallen for the idea that oppressively policing other people’s gender identity and expression could in any way be part of an enlightened future.
Reposted by Optimist Primus
bad news. it’s actually pretty nice having clothes put away instead of in a pile
September 29, 2025 at 2:39 AM
bad news. it’s actually pretty nice having clothes put away instead of in a pile
Reposted by Optimist Primus
Most people who say "I'm bad with names" mean they can't remember them. But I'm bad with names in another way. Anyway, meet my son Dipshit
December 12, 2025 at 4:59 PM
Most people who say "I'm bad with names" mean they can't remember them. But I'm bad with names in another way. Anyway, meet my son Dipshit
Reposted by Optimist Primus
we all
just want
a safe place
in which
to exist
just want
a safe place
in which
to exist
December 13, 2025 at 2:43 AM
we all
just want
a safe place
in which
to exist
just want
a safe place
in which
to exist
Reposted by Optimist Primus
If at first you don’t succeed, lay down and let the forest absorb you.
December 11, 2025 at 11:09 PM
If at first you don’t succeed, lay down and let the forest absorb you.
Reposted by Optimist Primus
Coworker who makes being a prophet of doom their whole personality
December 11, 2025 at 9:52 PM
Coworker who makes being a prophet of doom their whole personality
Reposted by Optimist Primus
sharks, i come today with an opportunity for you to invest in a cask of the finest amontillado in the world. please follow me into the catacombs so you can try it for yourselves
December 11, 2025 at 10:01 PM
sharks, i come today with an opportunity for you to invest in a cask of the finest amontillado in the world. please follow me into the catacombs so you can try it for yourselves
Reposted by Optimist Primus
nice try but the character based on you in my novella will experience a summer of hardship and loss
April 11, 2025 at 2:03 PM
nice try but the character based on you in my novella will experience a summer of hardship and loss
Reposted by Optimist Primus
i am the peacemaker. I have ended at least 8, almost 9 wars. so what if they were all thumb wars
December 10, 2025 at 11:16 PM
i am the peacemaker. I have ended at least 8, almost 9 wars. so what if they were all thumb wars
Reposted by Optimist Primus
nothing more humbling than walking into the grocery store and forgetting which foods you like
December 11, 2025 at 12:15 AM
nothing more humbling than walking into the grocery store and forgetting which foods you like
Reposted by Optimist Primus
oh, you’re “egging my house?” thanks for breakfast dumbass
December 2, 2024 at 9:28 PM
oh, you’re “egging my house?” thanks for breakfast dumbass
Reposted by Optimist Primus
I'm not your lawyer and this is not legal advice, but you might consider burying yourself in the soft earth.
December 10, 2025 at 5:35 PM
I'm not your lawyer and this is not legal advice, but you might consider burying yourself in the soft earth.
Reposted by Optimist Primus
whenever I hear a dog bark my first thought is always, "yeah, you got a point"
December 10, 2025 at 6:19 PM
whenever I hear a dog bark my first thought is always, "yeah, you got a point"
Reposted by Optimist Primus
A slightly tipsy Ursa Marceau does his famous “bear stuck in a box” routine for Santa and the elves at the annual North Pole company Christmas party.
December 9, 2025 at 4:53 PM
A slightly tipsy Ursa Marceau does his famous “bear stuck in a box” routine for Santa and the elves at the annual North Pole company Christmas party.
Reposted by Optimist Primus
i wish they'd stop calling it "the old abandoned mine" i live there
December 9, 2025 at 3:57 AM
i wish they'd stop calling it "the old abandoned mine" i live there
Reposted by Optimist Primus
i am really in the dark as to why my indoor sundial is not working
December 10, 2025 at 5:21 PM
i am really in the dark as to why my indoor sundial is not working
Reposted by Optimist Primus
my tweets have been bombing because i have sinned
December 9, 2025 at 9:15 PM
my tweets have been bombing because i have sinned
Reposted by Optimist Primus
Reposted by Optimist Primus
be careful out there today the static electricity is really bad some tacos just stuck to my mouth
December 9, 2025 at 7:42 PM
be careful out there today the static electricity is really bad some tacos just stuck to my mouth
