Jay
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jaydub083.bsky.social
Jay
@jaydub083.bsky.social
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My favorite color is 90s Taco Bell booth purple.
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“working hard, or hardly working” neither, napping hard
February 17, 2026 at 2:06 AM
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the real secret to budget eating and saving money on food is to simply stop growing after the 6th grade
February 17, 2026 at 2:10 AM
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no one can find me in here

--me from inside my giant puffer coat
February 13, 2026 at 2:15 AM
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Dog unemployment has reached 98%
February 15, 2026 at 6:10 PM
I was born with a silver spork in my mouth.
February 15, 2026 at 5:41 PM
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When I have food my dog looks at me the way rom com men look at women while soft indie music plays
February 15, 2026 at 4:50 AM
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wacky inflatable arm guys took my job
February 12, 2026 at 12:43 AM
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i enjoyed the giggles, but could have done without the shits
February 12, 2026 at 5:47 PM
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just wanted to let you know babe, you've got some drops of jupiter in your hair. nope other side.
February 12, 2026 at 1:19 PM
I like to watch the Olympics and suggest methods for athletic improvement between bites of queso.
February 13, 2026 at 9:44 PM
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they should make a salad that’s pizza
February 13, 2026 at 7:41 PM
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I don’t need flowers, I’d rather have cheese.
February 13, 2026 at 3:49 PM
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I’m tired but if anyone’s starting an angry mob I could muster the energy
February 12, 2026 at 2:58 AM
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(pouring jack daniels into personalized champagne flutes) let’s make this animal house an animal home
February 11, 2026 at 2:01 AM
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little know fact, Mozart was short for Mozzarella Art
February 11, 2026 at 2:45 AM
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I give the people what they want*

*violent eye rolling
February 9, 2026 at 2:16 AM
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My printer: I know you’ve only printed two documents but I’m out of ink
February 9, 2026 at 3:14 PM
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“Thank you for your payment” go to hell
February 9, 2026 at 12:14 AM
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curling but with each country’s most popular house cleaning music
February 8, 2026 at 3:15 PM
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Will I understand this Super Bowl if I haven’t seen the first fifty-nine
February 8, 2026 at 4:09 PM
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american cheese is just like regular cheese but it owns a gun
February 8, 2026 at 2:59 PM
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I miss old school TMNT. They looked like teenagers (I mean, I guess. They're turtles). They look old as fuck in the remakes the past 30 years.
February 8, 2026 at 1:48 AM
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putting a rotisserie chicken on each hand and boxing people at costco
February 7, 2026 at 8:39 PM
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'Play on playa'

- The inventor of beach volleyball
February 7, 2026 at 9:42 PM
“I’ll Oxford your comma, baby,” is how English majors turn on other English majors.
February 7, 2026 at 9:43 PM