Certified™ Not Chopped (They/Them) 🇵🇸
@dylanbickers.com
(They/them) Non-binary Jewish communist. Untrained anthropologist studying the significance of shitposts. My views do not reflect those of my unemployer.
Pinned
I love a quick sandwich. Havarti, chili crisp fried egg, smoked salmon, kewpie mayo. Just make a sandwich dawg I promise you won’t regret it.
Reposted by Certified™ Not Chopped (They/Them) 🇵🇸
all my ops shall suffer
November 12, 2025 at 7:39 PM
all my ops shall suffer
Reposted by Certified™ Not Chopped (They/Them) 🇵🇸
the account @farnerb0cken.bsky.social has been suspended indefinitely for cringe. his posts were just fucking terrible. you guys deserve better than that. for further details please contact @bsky.support
November 12, 2025 at 7:40 PM
the account @farnerb0cken.bsky.social has been suspended indefinitely for cringe. his posts were just fucking terrible. you guys deserve better than that. for further details please contact @bsky.support
Reposted by Certified™ Not Chopped (They/Them) 🇵🇸
it's a weird and for me at least unexpected side effect of the AI chip buildout that the industry has accidentally backdoored us into a golden age of incredibly powerful gaming mini PCs
November 12, 2025 at 6:11 PM
it's a weird and for me at least unexpected side effect of the AI chip buildout that the industry has accidentally backdoored us into a golden age of incredibly powerful gaming mini PCs
Reposted by Certified™ Not Chopped (They/Them) 🇵🇸
I am calling upon the people of Ireland to immediately begin construction of a thread on this site about how you or someone you know was roasted for a fashion choice. We need it.
All roasts must have come from Irish people *only*. Please respect this important rule, it makes a difference.
Tanks
All roasts must have come from Irish people *only*. Please respect this important rule, it makes a difference.
Tanks
November 12, 2025 at 5:45 AM
I am calling upon the people of Ireland to immediately begin construction of a thread on this site about how you or someone you know was roasted for a fashion choice. We need it.
All roasts must have come from Irish people *only*. Please respect this important rule, it makes a difference.
Tanks
All roasts must have come from Irish people *only*. Please respect this important rule, it makes a difference.
Tanks
Reposted by Certified™ Not Chopped (They/Them) 🇵🇸
for some reason, i don’t believe them
November 12, 2025 at 4:02 AM
for some reason, i don’t believe them
Reposted by Certified™ Not Chopped (They/Them) 🇵🇸
Reposted by Certified™ Not Chopped (They/Them) 🇵🇸
in a long life filled with saying stupid shit this is may be the stupidest shit he's ever said
November 11, 2025 at 7:21 PM
in a long life filled with saying stupid shit this is may be the stupidest shit he's ever said
Reposted by Certified™ Not Chopped (They/Them) 🇵🇸
Chud ideology is a disease that needs to be eradicated.
November 11, 2025 at 12:48 PM
Chud ideology is a disease that needs to be eradicated.
We got the Apple branded cum sock before GTA VI
November 11, 2025 at 2:54 PM
We got the Apple branded cum sock before GTA VI
Reposted by Certified™ Not Chopped (They/Them) 🇵🇸
4 UC Berkeley undergrads who put up a cardboard insect to protest Turning P*int USA’s sold out campus event are being charged with FELONY VANDALISM.
www.dailycal.org/news/campus/...
www.dailycal.org/news/campus/...
4 UC Berkeley students arrested on felony vandalism charges for anti-TPUSA art installation
UCPD arrested four students early Monday morning for felony vandalism, according to information from campus administrators.
www.dailycal.org
November 11, 2025 at 2:53 AM
4 UC Berkeley undergrads who put up a cardboard insect to protest Turning P*int USA’s sold out campus event are being charged with FELONY VANDALISM.
www.dailycal.org/news/campus/...
www.dailycal.org/news/campus/...
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low polyamory
November 10, 2025 at 9:33 PM
low polyamory
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Being a Homer fan is suffering.
November 11, 2025 at 4:02 AM
Being a Homer fan is suffering.
Reposted by Certified™ Not Chopped (They/Them) 🇵🇸
Happy circulatory system walking through the kitchen day to all who celebrate!
November 10, 2025 at 6:31 PM
Happy circulatory system walking through the kitchen day to all who celebrate!
Reposted by Certified™ Not Chopped (They/Them) 🇵🇸
I received this email about Democrats caving to end the shutdown from one of the SNAP recipients I spoke to:
November 10, 2025 at 2:17 PM
I received this email about Democrats caving to end the shutdown from one of the SNAP recipients I spoke to:
Reposted by Certified™ Not Chopped (They/Them) 🇵🇸
Reposted by Certified™ Not Chopped (They/Them) 🇵🇸
Being told they couldn't go to Applebee's for a week 5 years ago permanently destroyed the brain of so many losers. Nate you don't have friends or a job my dude, you were "socially distancing" either way.
the hipsters, they’re ordering double frufru mocha soy frappuccino. doesn’t anybody order a black coffee anymore
November 10, 2025 at 5:40 PM
Being told they couldn't go to Applebee's for a week 5 years ago permanently destroyed the brain of so many losers. Nate you don't have friends or a job my dude, you were "socially distancing" either way.
AI Black Friday: Slop til you Drop
November 10, 2025 at 4:40 PM
AI Black Friday: Slop til you Drop
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@schumer.senate.gov if you actually want to protect democracy i have some ideas (pic unrelated)
![Two days later Hemingway "quite deliberately" shot himself with his favorite shotgun in the early morning hours of July 2, 1961.[176] Meyers writes that he unlocked the basement storeroom where his guns were kept, went upstairs to the front entrance foyer, "pushed two shells into the twelve-gauge Boss shotgun ... put the end of the barrel into his mouth, pulled the trigger and blew out his brains."](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:ifnpirhh7ihbsqyee5yjrlam/bafkreifxxipu4f6wmqejz4g2xrfyt3lty6hd7ce6lz45zokrxyzn7ofhz4@jpeg)
November 10, 2025 at 1:43 PM
@schumer.senate.gov if you actually want to protect democracy i have some ideas (pic unrelated)
Reposted by Certified™ Not Chopped (They/Them) 🇵🇸
DONALD TRUMP: [asleep, drooling on long red tie]
SENATE DEMOCRATS: fine, we give in
SENATE DEMOCRATS: fine, we give in
November 10, 2025 at 2:37 AM
DONALD TRUMP: [asleep, drooling on long red tie]
SENATE DEMOCRATS: fine, we give in
SENATE DEMOCRATS: fine, we give in
Reposted by Certified™ Not Chopped (They/Them) 🇵🇸
seems to me that those democrats inclined not to fight perceive themselves as living through a somewhat ordinary cycle of presidential overreach and backlash and not something much more significant and dangerous
November 10, 2025 at 12:50 PM
seems to me that those democrats inclined not to fight perceive themselves as living through a somewhat ordinary cycle of presidential overreach and backlash and not something much more significant and dangerous
Reposted by Certified™ Not Chopped (They/Them) 🇵🇸
even when the democratic party has leverage and one of the craziest election swings the party intentionally self immolates it’s just so exhausting what is even the point of these people
November 10, 2025 at 2:43 AM
even when the democratic party has leverage and one of the craziest election swings the party intentionally self immolates it’s just so exhausting what is even the point of these people
Reposted by Certified™ Not Chopped (They/Them) 🇵🇸
Same here. Half our income. Bills going late or partially-paid. My spouse still having to work (and work OVERTIME) for no money.
And we were happy to muddle through, because the cause was worth it.
Absolutely disgusted with Senate Dems.
And we were happy to muddle through, because the cause was worth it.
Absolutely disgusted with Senate Dems.
My family has been without half our income for 40 days. It has been.. very hard.
We are willing to feel that pain so people can have health care next year, or to undo these illegal recissions.
We are not willing to have been put through this for NOTHING.
We are willing to feel that pain so people can have health care next year, or to undo these illegal recissions.
We are not willing to have been put through this for NOTHING.
November 10, 2025 at 3:03 AM
Same here. Half our income. Bills going late or partially-paid. My spouse still having to work (and work OVERTIME) for no money.
And we were happy to muddle through, because the cause was worth it.
Absolutely disgusted with Senate Dems.
And we were happy to muddle through, because the cause was worth it.
Absolutely disgusted with Senate Dems.
Reposted by Certified™ Not Chopped (They/Them) 🇵🇸
The grifters sent this *this morning*
November 10, 2025 at 3:04 AM
The grifters sent this *this morning*
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She thinks we are stupid.
Reporter: What do you say to your colleagues who say this isn't a fight, this is a capitulation?
Shaheen: We have a guaranteed vote by a guaranteed date…
Reporter: There is no guarantee that this will become law.
Shaheen: There was never a guarantee that it would be become law.
Shaheen: We have a guaranteed vote by a guaranteed date…
Reporter: There is no guarantee that this will become law.
Shaheen: There was never a guarantee that it would be become law.
November 10, 2025 at 2:51 AM
She thinks we are stupid.
Who’s gonna make a cuck chair big enough for all those senate democrats to sit on at once?
November 10, 2025 at 1:57 AM
Who’s gonna make a cuck chair big enough for all those senate democrats to sit on at once?