“MARV”
@twittermarv.bsky.social
My name isn’t actually Marvin at all
I just type things; there’s no unifying project here. Intolerable autocrat of tastes.
I just type things; there’s no unifying project here. Intolerable autocrat of tastes.
Pinned
OLDE FOOTY CLIP THREAD 🧵
Filbert Street, 1976 - Lou Macari, a good bloke and ex-Celtic player puts Man United into the lead over Leicester City in this FA Cup tie. At the end you’ll notice United keeper Alex Stepney wearing a baseball hat, not uncommon on sunny days back then
Filbert Street, 1976 - Lou Macari, a good bloke and ex-Celtic player puts Man United into the lead over Leicester City in this FA Cup tie. At the end you’ll notice United keeper Alex Stepney wearing a baseball hat, not uncommon on sunny days back then
Eventually the rest of the countries with vastly better educated populations will form various coalitions against this country and whoever is dumb enough to still be allied with us
January 3, 2026 at 8:04 PM
Eventually the rest of the countries with vastly better educated populations will form various coalitions against this country and whoever is dumb enough to still be allied with us
Reposted by “MARV”
These are the kind of violent imbeciles who need an entire wiki section for their ironic, exquisitely painful comeuppance and it will never happen and that breaks my heart
January 3, 2026 at 6:56 PM
These are the kind of violent imbeciles who need an entire wiki section for their ironic, exquisitely painful comeuppance and it will never happen and that breaks my heart
Jesus was probably all annoying like Tony Robbins
January 3, 2026 at 4:08 AM
Jesus was probably all annoying like Tony Robbins
(Axl Rose voice)
Your daddy works at Sbarro!
Now that mommy’s not arrround
Your daddy works at Sbarro!
Now that mommy’s not arrround
January 3, 2026 at 2:23 AM
(Axl Rose voice)
Your daddy works at Sbarro!
Now that mommy’s not arrround
Your daddy works at Sbarro!
Now that mommy’s not arrround
Reposted by “MARV”
And oh, what’s that?!
Ha-waiian noises?
Banging on my bunghole like a chimpanzee
Ah That ain’t woikin
Ha-waiian noises?
Banging on my bunghole like a chimpanzee
Ah That ain’t woikin
June 5, 2025 at 11:12 PM
And oh, what’s that?!
Ha-waiian noises?
Banging on my bunghole like a chimpanzee
Ah That ain’t woikin
Ha-waiian noises?
Banging on my bunghole like a chimpanzee
Ah That ain’t woikin
“Elites” just means people with technical knowledge you lack on a given subject who corrected you once and caused you embarrassment
January 3, 2026 at 1:15 AM
“Elites” just means people with technical knowledge you lack on a given subject who corrected you once and caused you embarrassment
They should eliminate unique kit numbers in football and go back to 1-11 numbering with 12,13,14, etc for substitutes
I know they won’t because of revenue but it was more fun and more aesthetically pleasing to me
I know they won’t because of revenue but it was more fun and more aesthetically pleasing to me
January 3, 2026 at 1:04 AM
They should eliminate unique kit numbers in football and go back to 1-11 numbering with 12,13,14, etc for substitutes
I know they won’t because of revenue but it was more fun and more aesthetically pleasing to me
I know they won’t because of revenue but it was more fun and more aesthetically pleasing to me
Reposted by “MARV”
Elon Musk's accomplishments over the last year include starving thousands of people to death (and laughing about it) and creating Hitler AI that undresses children (and laughing about it). Is it time to do something about billionaires yet?
January 2, 2026 at 9:20 PM
Elon Musk's accomplishments over the last year include starving thousands of people to death (and laughing about it) and creating Hitler AI that undresses children (and laughing about it). Is it time to do something about billionaires yet?
Wanna bust up an old chiffarobe
and drift awaayy
and drift awaayy
January 2, 2026 at 5:28 PM
Wanna bust up an old chiffarobe
and drift awaayy
and drift awaayy
Reposted by “MARV”
I too am not a bit tamed, I too am untranslatable,
I sound my barbaric hell yeah brother over the roofs of the world
- Walt Whitman
I sound my barbaric hell yeah brother over the roofs of the world
- Walt Whitman
January 2, 2026 at 4:51 PM
I too am not a bit tamed, I too am untranslatable,
I sound my barbaric hell yeah brother over the roofs of the world
- Walt Whitman
I sound my barbaric hell yeah brother over the roofs of the world
- Walt Whitman
It’s 1986.
Things many American school kids probably don’t know how to do:
* Use a Telegraph
* shoe a horse
* understand Latin
* hunt with a spear
Things many American school kids probably don’t know how to do:
* Use a Telegraph
* shoe a horse
* understand Latin
* hunt with a spear
It's 2026.
Things many American school kids probably don't know how to do:
* Dial a rotary telephone
* Tell time from an analog clock
* Read or write cursive
* Decipher Roman numerals
* Navigate with a paper map or use a compass
* Balance a checkbook
(Please add more below)
Things many American school kids probably don't know how to do:
* Dial a rotary telephone
* Tell time from an analog clock
* Read or write cursive
* Decipher Roman numerals
* Navigate with a paper map or use a compass
* Balance a checkbook
(Please add more below)
January 2, 2026 at 4:30 PM
It’s 1986.
Things many American school kids probably don’t know how to do:
* Use a Telegraph
* shoe a horse
* understand Latin
* hunt with a spear
Things many American school kids probably don’t know how to do:
* Use a Telegraph
* shoe a horse
* understand Latin
* hunt with a spear
Reposted by “MARV”
grok, dress his corpse in a micro bikini
(second gunshot)
(second gunshot)
January 2, 2026 at 4:12 PM
grok, dress his corpse in a micro bikini
(second gunshot)
(second gunshot)
“I asked ChatG-“
“Dude wtf there’s a red laser dot on your forehead!!!”
“Huh? Strange, lemme ask Gr-“
(Gunshot)
“Dude wtf there’s a red laser dot on your forehead!!!”
“Huh? Strange, lemme ask Gr-“
(Gunshot)
January 2, 2026 at 3:49 PM
“I asked ChatG-“
“Dude wtf there’s a red laser dot on your forehead!!!”
“Huh? Strange, lemme ask Gr-“
(Gunshot)
“Dude wtf there’s a red laser dot on your forehead!!!”
“Huh? Strange, lemme ask Gr-“
(Gunshot)
If we all gather together and keep saying “die” over and over, the thing will happen
January 2, 2026 at 2:06 PM
If we all gather together and keep saying “die” over and over, the thing will happen
Hemmies are like if your butt were an amplifier for farts and you turned up the GAIN knob
Little bit more punch in there
Little bit more punch in there
January 2, 2026 at 4:00 AM
Hemmies are like if your butt were an amplifier for farts and you turned up the GAIN knob
Little bit more punch in there
Little bit more punch in there
OLDE FOOTY CLIP THREAD 🧵
Filbert Street, 1976 - Lou Macari, a good bloke and ex-Celtic player puts Man United into the lead over Leicester City in this FA Cup tie. At the end you’ll notice United keeper Alex Stepney wearing a baseball hat, not uncommon on sunny days back then
Filbert Street, 1976 - Lou Macari, a good bloke and ex-Celtic player puts Man United into the lead over Leicester City in this FA Cup tie. At the end you’ll notice United keeper Alex Stepney wearing a baseball hat, not uncommon on sunny days back then
January 2, 2026 at 1:00 AM
OLDE FOOTY CLIP THREAD 🧵
Filbert Street, 1976 - Lou Macari, a good bloke and ex-Celtic player puts Man United into the lead over Leicester City in this FA Cup tie. At the end you’ll notice United keeper Alex Stepney wearing a baseball hat, not uncommon on sunny days back then
Filbert Street, 1976 - Lou Macari, a good bloke and ex-Celtic player puts Man United into the lead over Leicester City in this FA Cup tie. At the end you’ll notice United keeper Alex Stepney wearing a baseball hat, not uncommon on sunny days back then
I have 6000 followers so I’m going to start shedding some with a thread of vintage football clips. Why vintage clips? Because it’s a fascinating glimpse into a vastly different time when the distance between the players and supporters was a river instead of an ocean. I will pin the thread. TYFYATTM!
January 2, 2026 at 12:44 AM
I have 6000 followers so I’m going to start shedding some with a thread of vintage football clips. Why vintage clips? Because it’s a fascinating glimpse into a vastly different time when the distance between the players and supporters was a river instead of an ocean. I will pin the thread. TYFYATTM!
Aaand the northern girls,
with
the way they piss,
They keep their boyfriends warm at niiight
with
the way they piss,
They keep their boyfriends warm at niiight
January 1, 2026 at 8:34 PM
Aaand the northern girls,
with
the way they piss,
They keep their boyfriends warm at niiight
with
the way they piss,
They keep their boyfriends warm at niiight
Mayor Mamdani’s wife looks like a totally normal cool lady
The newspapers are cancer
The newspapers are cancer
January 1, 2026 at 8:22 PM
Mayor Mamdani’s wife looks like a totally normal cool lady
The newspapers are cancer
The newspapers are cancer
I’ll tell you once more
As I jack off on the floor
Don’t bring me down
As I jack off on the floor
Don’t bring me down
January 1, 2026 at 7:01 PM
I’ll tell you once more
As I jack off on the floor
Don’t bring me down
As I jack off on the floor
Don’t bring me down
Watching old episodes of “The Big Match” and it’s funny to me how people would write in with comments or whatever and Brian Moore would read out their full address like “our next letter is from Mr. Alf Figgybottom of 25 Lordship Terrace, Dickfield, Cuntshire and he writes that Leeds are shit…”
January 1, 2026 at 1:21 AM
Watching old episodes of “The Big Match” and it’s funny to me how people would write in with comments or whatever and Brian Moore would read out their full address like “our next letter is from Mr. Alf Figgybottom of 25 Lordship Terrace, Dickfield, Cuntshire and he writes that Leeds are shit…”
(din din din dindadinda din din)
And when I eat shit
Well you know I’m gonna beee
I’m gonna bee the man who’s eating shit for you
And when I eat shit
Well you know I’m gonna beee
I’m gonna bee the man who’s eating shit for you
December 31, 2025 at 6:02 PM
(din din din dindadinda din din)
And when I eat shit
Well you know I’m gonna beee
I’m gonna bee the man who’s eating shit for you
And when I eat shit
Well you know I’m gonna beee
I’m gonna bee the man who’s eating shit for you
(The fade out part…)
And I’ve been waiting for this moment!
For ALLL my liiiiiieeeiiife!
Go long!
Go looooong
He’s singing to his receivers
And I’ve been waiting for this moment!
For ALLL my liiiiiieeeiiife!
Go long!
Go looooong
He’s singing to his receivers
I can feel it
Coming in the air tonight
Go long
Coming in the air tonight
Go long
December 31, 2025 at 5:52 AM
(The fade out part…)
And I’ve been waiting for this moment!
For ALLL my liiiiiieeeiiife!
Go long!
Go looooong
He’s singing to his receivers
And I’ve been waiting for this moment!
For ALLL my liiiiiieeeiiife!
Go long!
Go looooong
He’s singing to his receivers
Reposted by “MARV”
K-19,
That’s ’Retha Franklin
That’s ’Retha Franklin
October 19, 2025 at 3:03 AM
K-19,
That’s ’Retha Franklin
That’s ’Retha Franklin