Catherine Cerveny
@catcerveny.bsky.social
Writer. Procrastinator. Dreamer. Author of THE RULE OF LUCK, THE CHAOS OF LUCK, THE GAME OF LUCK (Orbit). She/her. Rep'd by Rena Rossner.
catherinecerveny.com
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:6vtfpnvin3qo55mtrm2mq55g/feed/aaahflxe24pb4
catherinecerveny.com
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:6vtfpnvin3qo55mtrm2mq55g/feed/aaahflxe24pb4
Reposted by Catherine Cerveny
my posts are proof that you don’t need to be funny or talented to become mediocre on the internet
July 26, 2025 at 3:48 AM
my posts are proof that you don’t need to be funny or talented to become mediocre on the internet
Your inspirational quote has a typo in it.
July 26, 2025 at 3:54 AM
Your inspirational quote has a typo in it.
Until ChatGTP can come to my house and vacuum out my car, don’t even talk to me about the AI revolution and all the time it’s going to save me.
July 3, 2025 at 6:40 PM
Until ChatGTP can come to my house and vacuum out my car, don’t even talk to me about the AI revolution and all the time it’s going to save me.
Reposted by Catherine Cerveny
*corrects your grammar with more incorrect grammar*
March 22, 2025 at 1:14 PM
*corrects your grammar with more incorrect grammar*
I need a mental health day where I sleep and watch tv, and not one where I buy groceries and complain about always having to wash the grapes.
June 2, 2025 at 3:16 PM
I need a mental health day where I sleep and watch tv, and not one where I buy groceries and complain about always having to wash the grapes.
Reposted by Catherine Cerveny
What's the greatest decade?
80-YEAR-OLD: The 50s.
60-YEAR-OLD: The 70s.
40-YEAR-OLD: The 90s.
ME: Mankind's always been terrible.
80-YEAR-OLD: The 50s.
60-YEAR-OLD: The 70s.
40-YEAR-OLD: The 90s.
ME: Mankind's always been terrible.
May 9, 2025 at 11:27 PM
What's the greatest decade?
80-YEAR-OLD: The 50s.
60-YEAR-OLD: The 70s.
40-YEAR-OLD: The 90s.
ME: Mankind's always been terrible.
80-YEAR-OLD: The 50s.
60-YEAR-OLD: The 70s.
40-YEAR-OLD: The 90s.
ME: Mankind's always been terrible.
Reposted by Catherine Cerveny
why should I care about your baby, it’s a literal stranger to me
May 9, 2025 at 8:42 PM
why should I care about your baby, it’s a literal stranger to me
Reposted by Catherine Cerveny
*peels off resting bitch face to reveal an even more rested and bitchier face*
May 27, 2024 at 5:46 PM
*peels off resting bitch face to reveal an even more rested and bitchier face*
Reposted by Catherine Cerveny
I know I'm not the only one going through hardship right now, but please keep me in your thoughts as I try to recover from thanking someone for a compliment that wasn't intended for me.
November 23, 2024 at 9:55 PM
I know I'm not the only one going through hardship right now, but please keep me in your thoughts as I try to recover from thanking someone for a compliment that wasn't intended for me.
Reposted by Catherine Cerveny
Good Dad: Please eat your broccoli it's good for you
Bad Dad: Eat the goddamn broccoli or else
Car Salesman Dad: What can I do to get this broccoli into you
Bad Dad: Eat the goddamn broccoli or else
Car Salesman Dad: What can I do to get this broccoli into you
May 6, 2025 at 9:27 PM
Good Dad: Please eat your broccoli it's good for you
Bad Dad: Eat the goddamn broccoli or else
Car Salesman Dad: What can I do to get this broccoli into you
Bad Dad: Eat the goddamn broccoli or else
Car Salesman Dad: What can I do to get this broccoli into you
Reposted by Catherine Cerveny
Three things birds can do better than me
1. Fly
2. Find worms
3. Get up early
1. Fly
2. Find worms
3. Get up early
May 8, 2025 at 9:57 AM
Three things birds can do better than me
1. Fly
2. Find worms
3. Get up early
1. Fly
2. Find worms
3. Get up early
Reposted by Catherine Cerveny
Could an AI do this? *eats 20 slices of salami*
June 29, 2024 at 3:38 PM
Could an AI do this? *eats 20 slices of salami*
Reposted by Catherine Cerveny
Jesus loves you, because he doesn’t live with you.
December 11, 2024 at 11:35 AM
Jesus loves you, because he doesn’t live with you.
Reposted by Catherine Cerveny
The most challenging part of cooking is calculating the number of people I am.
January 25, 2025 at 12:33 PM
The most challenging part of cooking is calculating the number of people I am.
Reposted by Catherine Cerveny
Never a dull moment? How about just a few. Please
May 7, 2025 at 3:03 PM
Never a dull moment? How about just a few. Please
Reposted by Catherine Cerveny
them: here, take this lovely and sincere compliment
me: I'd rather you just punch me in the face
me: I'd rather you just punch me in the face
May 9, 2025 at 3:00 PM
them: here, take this lovely and sincere compliment
me: I'd rather you just punch me in the face
me: I'd rather you just punch me in the face
Reposted by Catherine Cerveny
Welcome to your 50's. Now you yell at the TV when someone uses a metal spatula on a nonstick pan like an absolute maniac.
May 9, 2025 at 7:19 AM
Welcome to your 50's. Now you yell at the TV when someone uses a metal spatula on a nonstick pan like an absolute maniac.
Reposted by Catherine Cerveny
Eating a salad as a kid: Ew, gross!
Eating a salad as an adult: Ew, gross!
Eating a salad as an adult: Ew, gross!
May 8, 2025 at 7:33 AM
Eating a salad as a kid: Ew, gross!
Eating a salad as an adult: Ew, gross!
Eating a salad as an adult: Ew, gross!
Reposted by Catherine Cerveny
The people constantly braying about “Christian values” are attacking the Pope for suggesting that we love others.
May 9, 2025 at 12:15 PM
The people constantly braying about “Christian values” are attacking the Pope for suggesting that we love others.
Kind of feel like my husband might be my villain origin story.
May 9, 2025 at 11:59 AM
Kind of feel like my husband might be my villain origin story.
At the funeral home, prearranging my dad's funeral. I feel like this cabinet should be full of alcohol. Frankly, funeral homes should be overflowing with alcohol and non-prescription drugs, in my opinion.
April 26, 2025 at 2:29 PM
At the funeral home, prearranging my dad's funeral. I feel like this cabinet should be full of alcohol. Frankly, funeral homes should be overflowing with alcohol and non-prescription drugs, in my opinion.
You don't run a country like it's a company. Your job is to look after your citizens, not harass, bankrupt, and bully them...unless you live in a dictatorship, I guess.
April 10, 2025 at 1:42 PM
You don't run a country like it's a company. Your job is to look after your citizens, not harass, bankrupt, and bully them...unless you live in a dictatorship, I guess.
Reposted by Catherine Cerveny
No. You’ve been watching stock market fraud.
April 9, 2025 at 11:11 PM
No. You’ve been watching stock market fraud.
Reposted by Catherine Cerveny
It is very important to have your Sunday coffee in a special Sunday Mug if you don’t do this the whole week is gonna be off
April 6, 2025 at 12:31 PM
It is very important to have your Sunday coffee in a special Sunday Mug if you don’t do this the whole week is gonna be off
Reposted by Catherine Cerveny
Nope. Not gonna follow anyone whose name is upside down. I got enough problems.
April 5, 2025 at 12:02 PM
Nope. Not gonna follow anyone whose name is upside down. I got enough problems.