Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
@birchchirper.bsky.social
Ne'er-do-well
Reposted by Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
everyone online is fighting an unseen battle and also a very public one too
January 20, 2026 at 4:40 AM
everyone online is fighting an unseen battle and also a very public one too
Reposted by Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
sorry your annoying ass engagement bait doesn't work here lol
A tale of three apps. Identical post sent at the same time:
Twitter: 136,000 likes, 20,000 shares
Threads: 46,000 likes, 4,000 ahares
Bluesky: 149 likes, 45 shares
To be clear, I have 60k followers on Twitter, 15k on Bluesky, but only 7k on Threads.
I love Bluesky, but this isn't sustainable.
Twitter: 136,000 likes, 20,000 shares
Threads: 46,000 likes, 4,000 ahares
Bluesky: 149 likes, 45 shares
To be clear, I have 60k followers on Twitter, 15k on Bluesky, but only 7k on Threads.
I love Bluesky, but this isn't sustainable.
January 19, 2026 at 9:53 PM
sorry your annoying ass engagement bait doesn't work here lol
Not to wade into discourse here but this is spectacularly funny to me. "Some Minnesotans profess unfamiliarity with me, despite 3000 of them reading my newsletter." There are 6 million people in Minnesota!
As many of the people who engaged me seem unfamiliar with my work, despite us having 3,000 current Hopium subscribers in Minnesota, I am going to now share some of my posts from this week: 7/
www.hopiumchronicles.com/p/judge-rein...
www.hopiumchronicles.com/p/judge-rein...
Judge Reins In ICE In MN, The Spanberger Era Begins In Richmond, Coons Delegation Expresses Solidarity With Europe/NATO In Denmark
Remarkably we already hit our $50k goal for the Minnesota DFL - thank you all!
www.hopiumchronicles.com
January 18, 2026 at 5:31 PM
Not to wade into discourse here but this is spectacularly funny to me. "Some Minnesotans profess unfamiliarity with me, despite 3000 of them reading my newsletter." There are 6 million people in Minnesota!
Reposted by Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
Average Sunday show interview:
OFFICIAL: we are going to dip enemies of the state into acid vats
HOST: how will you pay for it?
OFFICIAL: tariffs
HOST: critics say tariffs don't generate acid vat money
OFFICIAL: tariffs have generated more money than has ever existed
HOST: thank u for ur time
OFFICIAL: we are going to dip enemies of the state into acid vats
HOST: how will you pay for it?
OFFICIAL: tariffs
HOST: critics say tariffs don't generate acid vat money
OFFICIAL: tariffs have generated more money than has ever existed
HOST: thank u for ur time
January 18, 2026 at 3:53 PM
Average Sunday show interview:
OFFICIAL: we are going to dip enemies of the state into acid vats
HOST: how will you pay for it?
OFFICIAL: tariffs
HOST: critics say tariffs don't generate acid vat money
OFFICIAL: tariffs have generated more money than has ever existed
HOST: thank u for ur time
OFFICIAL: we are going to dip enemies of the state into acid vats
HOST: how will you pay for it?
OFFICIAL: tariffs
HOST: critics say tariffs don't generate acid vat money
OFFICIAL: tariffs have generated more money than has ever existed
HOST: thank u for ur time
Reposted by Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
Fellas, is it morally justifiable to log off?
January 16, 2026 at 4:40 AM
Fellas, is it morally justifiable to log off?
Reposted by Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
What tenderness there is in that preliminary touch!
January 15, 2026 at 7:47 PM
What tenderness there is in that preliminary touch!
Reposted by Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
im pretty sure the cashier at the grocery store was extremely impressed by how i organized my supplies on the conveyor belt. honestly surprised she didn't say "thank you ive never seen somebody do it so well". she was probably just speechless
January 14, 2026 at 1:32 AM
im pretty sure the cashier at the grocery store was extremely impressed by how i organized my supplies on the conveyor belt. honestly surprised she didn't say "thank you ive never seen somebody do it so well". she was probably just speechless
Reposted by Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
I mean it's true. They do not oppose social programs because they don't like paying taxes (though they don't like paying taxes) but because they oppose social programs from first principles. A social safety net makes it harder for them to exploit, enslave and rape people bsky.app/profile/gbaj...
January 12, 2026 at 5:58 AM
I mean it's true. They do not oppose social programs because they don't like paying taxes (though they don't like paying taxes) but because they oppose social programs from first principles. A social safety net makes it harder for them to exploit, enslave and rape people bsky.app/profile/gbaj...
Reposted by Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
Maybe the most fascinating belief among the billionaire class, especially the Silicon Valley set, has been their confidence that if they blow up the specific conditions and institutions that put them on top, they will certainly come out even higher on top
Congratulations to all the bankers, hedge-fund managers, private-equity honchos, tech titans, corporate executives and op-ed writers for backing the man who will do more to undermine the system that made them insanely wealthy than any other presidential candidate in their lifetimes.
Federal Reserve Chair Jerome Powell said the US central bank had been served grand jury subpoenas from the Justice Department threatening a criminal indictment, a dramatic escalation of the Trump administration’s attacks on the Fed.
www.bloomberg.com/news/article...
www.bloomberg.com/news/article...
January 12, 2026 at 3:14 AM
Maybe the most fascinating belief among the billionaire class, especially the Silicon Valley set, has been their confidence that if they blow up the specific conditions and institutions that put them on top, they will certainly come out even higher on top
Reposted by Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
your very existence is troubling, enraging, and distracting as hell for some of the shittiest people on earth so no, i’m afraid you may not kill yourself rn
January 11, 2026 at 5:27 PM
your very existence is troubling, enraging, and distracting as hell for some of the shittiest people on earth so no, i’m afraid you may not kill yourself rn
Reposted by Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
Hey we heard you have executive dysfunction so we created a giant bureaucratic maze and we're gonna put your executive dysfunction meds at the end of it. maybe.
January 11, 2026 at 8:26 AM
Hey we heard you have executive dysfunction so we created a giant bureaucratic maze and we're gonna put your executive dysfunction meds at the end of it. maybe.
Screaming "PICK ME" so loudly that it shatters the windows of my apartment
Ok, fine. I will get married for the economy. Where do I get my stay at home husband who will cook and clean?
We've reached the Econowife part of the Project
January 10, 2026 at 6:18 PM
Screaming "PICK ME" so loudly that it shatters the windows of my apartment
We want Trials! I'm voting for Trials. I'm a single issue voter and that issue is Trials. I'm voting for the candidate who promises the most Trials
January 9, 2026 at 8:06 PM
We want Trials! I'm voting for Trials. I'm a single issue voter and that issue is Trials. I'm voting for the candidate who promises the most Trials
Reposted by Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
Reposted by Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
Kinda sucks how one day you’ll post stuff like “does the Grinch use the toilet?” and then the next it has to be “I reject those who worship death”
January 7, 2026 at 10:55 PM
Kinda sucks how one day you’ll post stuff like “does the Grinch use the toilet?” and then the next it has to be “I reject those who worship death”
Reposted by Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
not trying to call anybody out but some people really need to remember that I don't know who needs to hear this
January 8, 2026 at 6:06 AM
not trying to call anybody out but some people really need to remember that I don't know who needs to hear this
Reposted by Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
carrying my depressed friend to a party like a backpack
January 6, 2026 at 4:35 AM
carrying my depressed friend to a party like a backpack
i made a MechWarrior mod that turns all the battlemechs into bony, small-breasted redheads who are kind of mean to me
January 4, 2026 at 8:23 PM
i made a MechWarrior mod that turns all the battlemechs into bony, small-breasted redheads who are kind of mean to me
Reposted by Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
my mind palace is NOT reducible to the functions of my brain palace
January 3, 2026 at 2:17 AM
my mind palace is NOT reducible to the functions of my brain palace
Reposted by Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
They say imitation crab is the sincerest form of crab
December 27, 2025 at 1:56 PM
They say imitation crab is the sincerest form of crab
Reposted by Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
I have always said it, I will continue to say it, we are limiting the productive potential of millions of freaks by demanding they earn a wage to survive instead of enabling them to do whatever thing their brain is broken for
December 22, 2025 at 12:45 AM
I have always said it, I will continue to say it, we are limiting the productive potential of millions of freaks by demanding they earn a wage to survive instead of enabling them to do whatever thing their brain is broken for
Pictured: rough beast, its hour come round at last, slouching towards Bethlehem to be born
These people all go to rich people megachurches so they have no idea how freaky this looks to normal people
December 21, 2025 at 10:10 PM
Pictured: rough beast, its hour come round at last, slouching towards Bethlehem to be born
Reposted by Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
you may have noticed i've posted a lot about Babes today. It's because I think they're good
December 18, 2025 at 10:39 PM
you may have noticed i've posted a lot about Babes today. It's because I think they're good
Reposted by Henry Carlos Preinbeam, Jr.
Epictetus said we suffer in imagination more than reality. I’m worried this isn’t true.
December 15, 2025 at 9:17 PM
Epictetus said we suffer in imagination more than reality. I’m worried this isn’t true.