probablyRob
@probably-rob.bsky.social
I only post here because I was banned on the Jeremy Renner app™️
Reposted by probablyRob
An apple a day keeps the doctor away. They can also repel pharmacists if you throw them hard enough. But you're going to need a pineapple or a durian if you want to take down a dentist.
November 25, 2025 at 12:08 PM
An apple a day keeps the doctor away. They can also repel pharmacists if you throw them hard enough. But you're going to need a pineapple or a durian if you want to take down a dentist.
When pressed for details on what exactly the “principles” of DOGE are, a Trump administration spokesperson replied “Uh… racism? Oh and rich people, we like rich people”.
Trump administration officials acknowledged that the Department of Government Efficiency no longer operates as a “centralized” organization but insisted that the “principles” of the administration’s signature cost-slashing initiative remain alive and well. https://cnn.it/43LLNxA
November 25, 2025 at 2:30 AM
When pressed for details on what exactly the “principles” of DOGE are, a Trump administration spokesperson replied “Uh… racism? Oh and rich people, we like rich people”.
Reposted by probablyRob
A now- infamous review, hysterical and worth a cheer up read
November 24, 2025 at 12:38 PM
A now- infamous review, hysterical and worth a cheer up read
New for Christmas - Nazi Barbie now comes with her own Nazi Barbiemobile
November 23, 2025 at 4:36 PM
New for Christmas - Nazi Barbie now comes with her own Nazi Barbiemobile
My loneliness is killin' me
I must confess, I still believe (Still believe)
When I'm not with you, I lose my mind
Give me a sign
Hit me, baby, one more time
I must confess, I still believe (Still believe)
When I'm not with you, I lose my mind
Give me a sign
Hit me, baby, one more time
November 23, 2025 at 5:20 AM
My loneliness is killin' me
I must confess, I still believe (Still believe)
When I'm not with you, I lose my mind
Give me a sign
Hit me, baby, one more time
I must confess, I still believe (Still believe)
When I'm not with you, I lose my mind
Give me a sign
Hit me, baby, one more time
Did Mamdani give him a makeover?
President Donald Trump, now friendly with New York City mayor-elect Zohran Mamdani and fighting with Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene, has a colorful new look.
Donald Trump's colorful week, from Marjorie to Mamdani, ends with new look
President Donald Trump, now friendly with New York City mayor-elect Zohran Mamdani and fighting with Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene, has a colorful new look.
bit.ly
November 23, 2025 at 1:11 AM
Did Mamdani give him a makeover?
I’m pretty sure all this happened because Mamdani brought Trump a Big Mac
November 22, 2025 at 5:07 AM
I’m pretty sure all this happened because Mamdani brought Trump a Big Mac
Reposted by probablyRob
Hal hadn’t survived three Thanksgivings by being stupid.
November 21, 2025 at 2:08 PM
Hal hadn’t survived three Thanksgivings by being stupid.
This is the chair your boss gets you when they want you to sit down, but not for very long
November 21, 2025 at 2:29 AM
This is the chair your boss gets you when they want you to sit down, but not for very long
Tom Cotton: The women we threw in the lake all drowned, so that proves they must have been witches
Cotton on Trump's boat strikes: "Use common sense. If any of these had been boats full of fisherman or refugees, CNN would've already been on the ground & interviewed all their families & told their stories. We can be confident all of these strikes have been against cartel-based drug traffickers."
November 20, 2025 at 5:59 PM
Tom Cotton: The women we threw in the lake all drowned, so that proves they must have been witches
Great, I’m moving next door to a soup-n-salad restaurant
Markwayne Mullin: "Reward people for being healthy. Think about this. Healthcare is the only industry that you're not rewarded for taking care of your responsibility. If you think about homeowners insurance, if you're within 500 feet of a fire hydrant, your insurance goes down."
November 19, 2025 at 4:18 PM
Great, I’m moving next door to a soup-n-salad restaurant
It’s a jail, it’s a morgue, it’s a jmailorgue
KUDLOW: Are you able to reform the SNAP and food stamp program? Are there a lot of able-bodied people who shouldn't be in there?
BROOKE ROLLINS: What DOGE and our amazing team at USDA have found is 186,000 dead people are receiving SNAP benefits. We've made hundreds of arrests.
BROOKE ROLLINS: What DOGE and our amazing team at USDA have found is 186,000 dead people are receiving SNAP benefits. We've made hundreds of arrests.
November 19, 2025 at 5:03 AM
It’s a jail, it’s a morgue, it’s a jmailorgue
Department of Labor, not producing an unemployment report: “Stats are down but he played great”
I need "Stats are down but he played great" to make it into the lexicon.
November 19, 2025 at 4:58 AM
Department of Labor, not producing an unemployment report: “Stats are down but he played great”
I got my followers the old fashioned way (replying to every spambot on the internet)
I got my followers the old fashioned way (piggybacking off the popularity of people I follow and using my magnetic personality)
I got my followers the old fashioned way (being mid and getting added to starter packs)
November 19, 2025 at 4:52 AM
I got my followers the old fashioned way (replying to every spambot on the internet)
If I broke a vase I might say “I made a huge mistake and I’ll do my best that this doesn’t happen again”.
I don’t think that quite covers murdering and dismembering a journalist.
I don’t think that quite covers murdering and dismembering a journalist.
MBS claims the murder of Khashoggi was "a huge mistake and we're our doing our best that this doesn't happen again."
November 18, 2025 at 11:44 PM
If I broke a vase I might say “I made a huge mistake and I’ll do my best that this doesn’t happen again”.
I don’t think that quite covers murdering and dismembering a journalist.
I don’t think that quite covers murdering and dismembering a journalist.
Me looking over the bank statement: WHO HIRED THE HITMAN?
November 18, 2025 at 11:39 PM
Me looking over the bank statement: WHO HIRED THE HITMAN?
Reposted by probablyRob
mr president sir theres a story coming about how you intervened to help a sex criminal. no sir, not that sex criminal you helped….no not that one either…sir, please stop guessing sex criminals that you helped. ill give you a hint sir, hes a trafficker. no sir, not that trafficker a different one
NEW: When Andrew Tate landed in the US, Customs & Border Protection seized his electronic devices. But @propublica.org found that a White House official told DHS to return the devices, emphasizing that the request came from the White House.
By @robert-faturechi.bsky.social & Avi Asher-Schapiro
By @robert-faturechi.bsky.social & Avi Asher-Schapiro
The White House Intervened on Behalf of Accused Sex Trafficker Andrew Tate During a Federal Investigation
Federal authorities were chided for seizing electronic devices from Tate and his brother, and told to return them, records and interviews show. Experts said the intervention was highly inappropriate.
www.propublica.org
November 18, 2025 at 1:10 PM
mr president sir theres a story coming about how you intervened to help a sex criminal. no sir, not that sex criminal you helped….no not that one either…sir, please stop guessing sex criminals that you helped. ill give you a hint sir, hes a trafficker. no sir, not that trafficker a different one
Hey look it’s that persecution of Christians we’ve always heard so much about from Republicans
"Agencies within the U.S. Department of Homeland Security, including ICE, ERO, and CBP intend to implement a comprehensive plan to target Spanish-speaking churches across the country during the upcoming holiday season between Thanksgiving, Nov. 27, and Christmas, Dec. 25."
Exclusive: Trump DHS Plans Immigration Raids on Churches Over Holidays
The Trump Dept. of Homeland Security is briefing federal agencies on plans for immigration enforcement operations inside churches over holidays.
thisweekinworcester.com
November 18, 2025 at 2:17 AM
Hey look it’s that persecution of Christians we’ve always heard so much about from Republicans
Tonight on CBS it’s an all new episode of FBI.
“Maggie and OA have infiltrated a gang of terrorists and they are just about to take them down when President Trumps orders them to drop all of that and arrest Bill Clinton.”
“Maggie and OA have infiltrated a gang of terrorists and they are just about to take them down when President Trumps orders them to drop all of that and arrest Bill Clinton.”
November 18, 2025 at 2:06 AM
Tonight on CBS it’s an all new episode of FBI.
“Maggie and OA have infiltrated a gang of terrorists and they are just about to take them down when President Trumps orders them to drop all of that and arrest Bill Clinton.”
“Maggie and OA have infiltrated a gang of terrorists and they are just about to take them down when President Trumps orders them to drop all of that and arrest Bill Clinton.”
He smurfed. He smurfed smurfing. He smurfed being smurfed. He smurfed smurf itself.
i think this may be the bit that broke me bc I am picturing her self-satisfied smirk at coming up with this and it is, honestly, making me die a little on the inside
November 17, 2025 at 9:06 PM
He smurfed. He smurfed smurfing. He smurfed being smurfed. He smurfed smurf itself.
Reposted by probablyRob
don't associate me with Hitler! he only came as a guest of my friend, Mussolini!
Q: You had dinner with Nick Fuentes at Mar-a-Lago a few years ago. What role should he play in the conservative movement?
TRUMP: I didn't know he was coming and he was with as you know somebody -- Kayne. Kayne asked if he could have dinner and he brought Nick. I didn't know Nick at the time.
TRUMP: I didn't know he was coming and he was with as you know somebody -- Kayne. Kayne asked if he could have dinner and he brought Nick. I didn't know Nick at the time.
November 17, 2025 at 12:14 AM
don't associate me with Hitler! he only came as a guest of my friend, Mussolini!
I caught Zalmonella at Zaxby’s!
Him: Are you enjoying your "Zalad" from Zaxby's?
Me, eating: I mean I don't love that they call it that.
Him: I think they have to, for legal reasons.
Me, eating: I mean I don't love that they call it that.
Him: I think they have to, for legal reasons.
November 17, 2025 at 2:12 AM
I caught Zalmonella at Zaxby’s!
Reposted by probablyRob
Dr. Pepper is now running commercials showing how the winners of the championship week Tuition Toss are thriving in life because of their winnings. i am producing a follow-up where the losers are like "yeah I lost by 2 points in the 2011 Pac-12 Tuition Toss and i'm still paying off my student loans"
November 16, 2025 at 1:19 AM
Dr. Pepper is now running commercials showing how the winners of the championship week Tuition Toss are thriving in life because of their winnings. i am producing a follow-up where the losers are like "yeah I lost by 2 points in the 2011 Pac-12 Tuition Toss and i'm still paying off my student loans"
The notes of Eli Drinkwitz’s therapist:
Why is Eli Drinkwitz so angry?
November 16, 2025 at 4:53 AM
The notes of Eli Drinkwitz’s therapist:
Post your favorite Star Trek character. Wrong answers only.
November 15, 2025 at 9:51 PM
Post your favorite Star Trek character. Wrong answers only.