dr. hazel 🐇
@hazelmonforton.com
senior writer and narrative designer 🎮📝 open to work!
previously Blizzard 💛⚔️ Bungie 💙💫 and Arkane 🧡🐀
personal account 🍞🌹 20th century lit phd 🎓🗡
she/her 🌑✨
nyc 🍕🐁 to atx 🌻🦇
previously Blizzard 💛⚔️ Bungie 💙💫 and Arkane 🧡🐀
personal account 🍞🌹 20th century lit phd 🎓🗡
she/her 🌑✨
nyc 🍕🐁 to atx 🌻🦇
Pinned
dr. hazel 🐇
@hazelmonforton.com
· Sep 30
Hazel Monforton
www.hazelmonforton.com
Hello new followers! I'm Hazel.
🐔 Chicken keeper 🐕 Tripod dog owner 📃 Writer 🎮 Senior Narrative Designer 🍞 Baker ⛪️ Amateur medievalist 🌱 Gardener 🧶 Knitter 🎓 PhD in English lit
Previously: 💛⚔️ Blizzard 💙💫 Bungie 🧡🐀 Arkane
Looking for my next role!
Find my work on my website: www.hazelmonforton.com
🐔 Chicken keeper 🐕 Tripod dog owner 📃 Writer 🎮 Senior Narrative Designer 🍞 Baker ⛪️ Amateur medievalist 🌱 Gardener 🧶 Knitter 🎓 PhD in English lit
Previously: 💛⚔️ Blizzard 💙💫 Bungie 🧡🐀 Arkane
Looking for my next role!
Find my work on my website: www.hazelmonforton.com
Reposted by dr. hazel 🐇
Reposted by dr. hazel 🐇
Every crazy successful AAA concept artist I know is a Pervert
saw an artist knock out that frieren angle meme like it was nothing bc they were so used to drawing it in nsfw fanart, proving that once again, obsessively drawing nsfw of your favorite ships will make you improve leaps and bounds as an artist 😂
November 19, 2025 at 5:40 AM
Every crazy successful AAA concept artist I know is a Pervert
Reposted by dr. hazel 🐇
If someone stopped me in the street, put a mic in my face and asked me of all the people I know, who would I deem most likely to fixate on the king of the murder orgy elves, I would say with all my heart and with my mouth too close to the mic "Hazel Monforton"
November 13, 2025 at 5:31 AM
If someone stopped me in the street, put a mic in my face and asked me of all the people I know, who would I deem most likely to fixate on the king of the murder orgy elves, I would say with all my heart and with my mouth too close to the mic "Hazel Monforton"
Reposted by dr. hazel 🐇
It's not a foolproof plan but every political debate from now on should be a Normal Guy competition. Ask them to describe grocery shopping in detail. Talk about what it's like to have a friend
November 19, 2025 at 2:13 AM
It's not a foolproof plan but every political debate from now on should be a Normal Guy competition. Ask them to describe grocery shopping in detail. Talk about what it's like to have a friend
Reposted by dr. hazel 🐇
Knitted a blanket for @devongiehl.bsky.social and @iainhendry.bsky.social 🧡
April 19, 2025 at 7:44 PM
Knitted a blanket for @devongiehl.bsky.social and @iainhendry.bsky.social 🧡
Reposted by dr. hazel 🐇
Reposted by dr. hazel 🐇
Every once in a while a group of 10-15 tourists vanish without a trace in the Paris Catacombs and then afterward the Eiffel Tower is a few feet taller
October 11, 2025 at 6:24 PM
Every once in a while a group of 10-15 tourists vanish without a trace in the Paris Catacombs and then afterward the Eiffel Tower is a few feet taller
Reposted by dr. hazel 🐇
started ragging on cybertrucks
November 19, 2025 at 3:34 AM
started ragging on cybertrucks
NO WE SAW A CYBERTRUCK THE VIBE IS RUINED OUR TRIP IS RUINED
November 19, 2025 at 3:33 AM
NO WE SAW A CYBERTRUCK THE VIBE IS RUINED OUR TRIP IS RUINED
Reposted by dr. hazel 🐇
Ahem. We say "featuring pitbull" these days
November 19, 2025 at 1:52 AM
Ahem. We say "featuring pitbull" these days
Reminder that we call Junie’s leg stump her chicken nuggy because it’s golden brown and boneless.
November 19, 2025 at 1:45 AM
Reminder that we call Junie’s leg stump her chicken nuggy because it’s golden brown and boneless.
Reposted by dr. hazel 🐇
Fact: Asdrubael Vect is Lady Malys’s ex.
Fact: Asdrubael Vect has had several lovers.
Therefore: to defeat Asdrubael Vect you must first defeat his seven evil exes.
Fact: Asdrubael Vect has had several lovers.
Therefore: to defeat Asdrubael Vect you must first defeat his seven evil exes.
November 16, 2025 at 12:25 AM
Fact: Asdrubael Vect is Lady Malys’s ex.
Fact: Asdrubael Vect has had several lovers.
Therefore: to defeat Asdrubael Vect you must first defeat his seven evil exes.
Fact: Asdrubael Vect has had several lovers.
Therefore: to defeat Asdrubael Vect you must first defeat his seven evil exes.
Reposted by dr. hazel 🐇
Pour one out for all the guys who can't talk to their girlfriends because ChatGPT is down
November 18, 2025 at 2:30 PM
Pour one out for all the guys who can't talk to their girlfriends because ChatGPT is down
Reposted by dr. hazel 🐇
The Bread Book was made by Parsons design students in 1974 to celebrate New York City baking culture.
Art director: Cipe Pineles
Art director: Cipe Pineles
October 8, 2024 at 10:59 PM
The Bread Book was made by Parsons design students in 1974 to celebrate New York City baking culture.
Art director: Cipe Pineles
Art director: Cipe Pineles
Reposted by dr. hazel 🐇
I keep realizing that the reason I'm not seeing certain terrible genres of post/terrible branches of discourse is just cause everyone on this site is old
November 19, 2025 at 12:02 AM
I keep realizing that the reason I'm not seeing certain terrible genres of post/terrible branches of discourse is just cause everyone on this site is old
People just go online and say whatever.
November 19, 2025 at 12:47 AM
People just go online and say whatever.
I started talking about space marines
November 18, 2025 at 4:00 PM
I started talking about space marines
Four hour drive today!
November 18, 2025 at 1:57 PM
Four hour drive today!
Reposted by dr. hazel 🐇
networking is an incredibly important part of maintaining a professional presence in your creative industry, but it can be daunting. have you tried being completely fucking ridiculous online
November 13, 2025 at 8:18 PM
networking is an incredibly important part of maintaining a professional presence in your creative industry, but it can be daunting. have you tried being completely fucking ridiculous online
Reposted by dr. hazel 🐇
People say Cancel Culture is real and then you see Lydia Tár being invited to meet the Pope. 🙄
November 15, 2025 at 4:29 PM
People say Cancel Culture is real and then you see Lydia Tár being invited to meet the Pope. 🙄
Cantaloupe agua fresca!
November 17, 2025 at 5:42 PM
Cantaloupe agua fresca!
Reposted by dr. hazel 🐇
"Desire. Desire. DESIRE. and some nice sheets, but not that slippery Egyptian stuff."
November 17, 2025 at 3:54 PM
"Desire. Desire. DESIRE. and some nice sheets, but not that slippery Egyptian stuff."
Reposted by dr. hazel 🐇
"I loved his brain. I hated the idea of an intruder therein."
November 17, 2025 at 3:48 PM
"I loved his brain. I hated the idea of an intruder therein."