Ben Yates
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benyates.bsky.social
Ben Yates
@benyates.bsky.social
Opsimath, betwixt fascinating rock and smart looking hard place. #OUFC
Not shouted into the void for a while. So this year has been Onehellofayear(TM) but yesterday I had an offer accepted on a house.

Related, I have the finest breakfast bagel in the history of food.
November 20, 2025 at 10:36 AM
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All respectable nicknames
A ROAST IN A BEEF

GIANT YORKSHIRE PORK

PUDDING TURKEY
November 20, 2025 at 9:21 AM
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The whole problem with current Labour is encapsulated right here in this paragraph. One hand tries to ameliorate child poverty while the other hand makes it worse.

Some of us think immigrants and their children count. That they, too, are people. Some of us don’t.
November 20, 2025 at 8:44 AM
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Paddington looks like he's seen things no bear should have to see.
November 20, 2025 at 8:50 AM
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Its so cold in here I am wearing fingerless gloves like Alvin Stardust in a particularly shit one man version of "A Christmas Carol".
November 20, 2025 at 9:09 AM
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Accidentally texted "Olay" instead of "Okay" and now my text has a smooth, youthful look.
November 10, 2025 at 7:53 PM
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I reiterate my contention that transphobes don't remotely understand what they're supposedly mad about. Lazy thinking that arises from confused, post hoc justifications for their personal discomfort.
World's worst gotcha from Trevor Phillips: "If trans women are women why don't we just say 'women'... who needs 'pregnant people?'" 🤔
Great to see @zackpolanski.bsky.social on @skynewsrss.bsky.social this morning standing up for trans people.

It’s clear that Trevor Phillips was trying to trap Zack by not giving him all the facts! Martine Croxall not only eye rolled, she changed a direct quote - unethical for a journalist!
November 9, 2025 at 11:44 AM
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November 9, 2025 at 12:36 PM
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In the best tradition of Swift, Henry skirts the edges of believability so masterfully that you feel obliged to check it's actually satire.
NEW - D-Day Veteran Removed From Remembrance Parade After Forgetting His Poppy

Full story here:

mrhenrymorris.substack.com/p/d-day-vete...
November 9, 2025 at 9:44 AM
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Can’t wait to hear fuel duty get frozen again in the budget in ten days or so!!
Govt scraps all electrification investment. Midland Main Line to stay forever diesel Leicester Nottingham Derby Sheffield. Hugely embarrassing and inexplicable
www.ft.com/content/5ecd...
UK transport secretary says full electrification of railways ‘not affordable right now’
Heidi Alexander says focus will be on other projects such as HS2
www.ft.com
November 9, 2025 at 9:25 AM
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On Bob Mortimer's Desert Island Discs he's asked why nobody's doing comedy like he did anymore, which always feels like the guest is being baited into saying they'd be "cancelled", and he answers "because it's a career path now, not just lads dicking about". Refreshing perspective.
November 8, 2025 at 5:44 PM
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You laugh, but this is how the exododus went extinct
November 3, 2025 at 3:36 PM
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James likes his jokes well done.

Good restaurant kitchens have good art.
November 3, 2025 at 6:56 PM
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Currently obsessed with a local shelter cat called “Colin Feral”
November 3, 2025 at 6:56 PM
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I like how Peter Serafinowicz even keeps the "extremely incompetent failing business" joke going right down to the sole choice of delivery company
November 2, 2025 at 11:07 AM
I don't post much. But a year ago today was the lowest I ever was. Today that is resonating. A lot has happened since and it seems a world away. But I'm feeling those wounds tonight. #screamingintothevoid
October 30, 2025 at 8:45 PM
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Our friends at Hamble Valley Reform have a Facebook page, and this is their profile image.

And I can't stop laughing.
October 28, 2025 at 10:32 PM
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Does 'heinous' rhyme with 'penis' or 'anus'? To win a prize, send your one word answer to Piers Morgan. Good luck!
December 15, 2023 at 6:10 PM
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This was one of my most popular tweets.
October 23, 2025 at 4:02 PM
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October 25, 2025 at 9:37 PM
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Chris Mason after that by-election result came in
October 24, 2025 at 7:11 AM
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Poor take by Curtice.

This is a disaster for Farage. Polls had RefUK closely winning. Losing by 11% signposts Plaid to all of Wales as THE tactical choice for Senedd Elex and drains RefUK momentum.

"Something is happening out there", alright. People are uniting to tell Farage to feck right off.
Prof John Curtice also calling it a great night for Reform too & focusing on Lab vote collapse instead of the turnout + tactical vote
October 24, 2025 at 8:59 AM
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The German company that makes the mechanical ladder used in the Louvre heist has used the image to advertise, with the text 'When you need to move fast'

10/10 response, no notes
October 24, 2025 at 8:27 AM
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“Voters have gone off them since 2010” being the most in-depth explanation we’ll get. Was there a particular program implemented around 2010 that’s proven to be disastrous? Maybe there was, but what if all the important people had said it was great and screamed abuse at people who said it wasn’t
October 24, 2025 at 9:14 AM
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Boris’s Children: my SKETCH of Today in subjects he loves to forget.
Boris’s children | Robert Hutton | The Critic Magazine
“My memory is now contaminated.” It was one of the more accurate statements we heard from Boris Johnson on Tuesday morning, though this is never a high bar. He was speaking, again…
thecritic.co.uk
October 21, 2025 at 4:44 PM