Von Hitchofen ™⍼☈♅ 🛩👹😬
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vonhitchofen.bsky.social
Von Hitchofen ™⍼☈♅ 🛩👹😬
@vonhitchofen.bsky.social
Another hard shift at the keyboard factory.
From an obscure body in the S-K System
Internet legend of the Ineffectual Dork Web
I like aeroplanes and em dashes.

Team Crap Dad.
Pinned
Doctors: we need to boost your confidence and find your inner happiness!

Depressed person: that would be great

Doctors: *prescribes drugs that lowers your libido and makes you fat*

Depressed person:
Reposted by Von Hitchofen ™⍼☈♅ 🛩👹😬
I’m beginning to suspect all of the men in the Trump administration are impotent.
November 16, 2025 at 1:04 AM
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Heartbroken to hear of @sfdirewolf.bsky.social ‘s transition to be a crip anscestor AND feeling so honored to have been alive in the time as this brilliant human, and gotten to learn from her.

May her memory continue to always be a blessing.
November 15, 2025 at 5:50 AM
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Yep, well, apparently, it was THIS Bubba...
NOT Bill Clinton after all. 🤷‍♀️

This is all getting curiouser & curiouser. 🤔
November 15, 2025 at 8:02 AM
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For the first time since it's founding there's an actual conspiracy that indicts powerful elites and there are actual documents that actually prove it and Infowars is like "nah"
November 13, 2025 at 3:47 AM
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this is a far more explicit death threat from people with the actual means to carry it out
November 14, 2025 at 3:04 PM
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I guess the main difference is that the Bluesky mods aren’t afraid of Patton Oswalt
this is a far more explicit death threat from people with the actual means to carry it out
November 15, 2025 at 8:00 AM
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nothing but respect to the urban assault smart car
November 15, 2025 at 3:55 AM
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Just another reminder of how Bannon's "populism" is a sham and he's really out here to do the bidding of elites

www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025...
Steve Bannon advised Jeffrey Epstein for years on how to rehab his reputation, texts show
Pair devised responses to public outrage about Epstein’s criminal history, his treatment by the justice system, and his friendships with powerful people
www.theguardian.com
November 15, 2025 at 11:35 AM
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A local bakery just posted this photo on Facebook. I’ve gotten stuff from her before. Nice older lady. I do not know if she made it but…it’s perfect. Perfect.
November 15, 2025 at 4:07 AM
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Taking a moment to realise that in the movie 2010 its revealed that HAL in 2001 goes nuts because he is asked to lie.
November 15, 2025 at 1:03 PM
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November 15, 2025 at 8:44 AM
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When Massachusetts passed a "millionaires tax" in 2023, conservatives claimed the rich would flee.

But two years later, they haven't — and MA has collected $5.7B for infrastructure and public education.

A reminder that positive change can still happen at the state level.
November 14, 2025 at 4:13 PM
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one of the great injuries of attempting to cling to a morality in the united states is that the most immoral punishments in the world are delivered routinely, and the most immoral crimes are completely exempt from even the consideration that they might in any possible world be subject to them
November 15, 2025 at 10:52 AM
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November 15, 2025 at 1:04 PM
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If I came from a family that has held a seat in House of Lords for 7 generations and used it to protect their vast empire from Tax and Inheritance Tax.

I probably wouldn't be complaining about free bus passes for Senior Citizens.

You'd look ridiculous.
November 14, 2025 at 6:47 PM
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For the record, as a somewhat public individual, I would be rather less concerned with someone on social media saying "John Scalzi should meet a wood chipper" than, say, "I wonder how quickly John Scalzi's house would burn." The former is hyperbole, pretty clearly; the second feels like a threat.
November 14, 2025 at 3:50 PM
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"If you don't let me punch you in the face, the other guy will kick you in the nuts" doesn't seem like a sustainable political message.
November 15, 2025 at 12:39 PM
The three main food groups for northerners.
My friend lives in Leeds, this is what the eat there 🙂
November 15, 2025 at 12:48 PM
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Imagination is what's lacking in Western politics and Starmer is the gold star case study. It doesn't even occur to him to tell a story about his vision for what the UK should and could be like - much less to try to summon any manner of vision in the first place.
Government isn't middle management.
a man in a suit and tie is saying " i 'm virtually bursting with adequatulence "
ALT: a man in a suit and tie is saying " i 'm virtually bursting with adequatulence "
media.tenor.com
November 15, 2025 at 12:44 PM
Reposted by Von Hitchofen ™⍼☈♅ 🛩👹😬
New map produced by RTVE, Spanish national TV, of the 6000 mass graves in Spain. In the last 25 years some 17,000 bodies of men, women and children have been exhumed out of the ~120,000 dumped in mass unmarked graves by the Franco regime.
www.rtve.es/noticias/fos...
November 15, 2025 at 11:40 AM
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First, they came for the pedophiles, and I did n-- *touching earpiece* oh, they didn't?
November 15, 2025 at 12:37 AM
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ME: I got you some flowers, honey!
MY BEE WIFE: (rolling her five eyes) Oh great, more work
February 14, 2025 at 3:28 PM
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People: we want affordable housing and healthcare

Government:
November 14, 2025 at 7:58 AM
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They should make a version of The Death of Stalin about Liz Truss’ premiership but everyone is played by someone from a random country someone has selected by throwing a dart at a map of the world
Honestly we should return the favour. UK political drama where the PM and every other cabinet member is played by a Yank
November 14, 2025 at 10:16 PM
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Basically, just because battleships weren't fighting doesn't mean they weren't achieving the purpose of building them. And sure, eventually they came up against a new technology that made them obsolete - but so did the spear.
November 14, 2025 at 9:43 PM