Unhappy John Candy
@unhappyjohncandy.bsky.social
Forklift certified. Too ugly for Instagram.
Pinned
@jeffgerstmann.com @bradshoemaker.bsky.social @vinnycaravella.bsky.social I’m listening to an old Bombcast from 2010 and can you believe that Microsoft raised the price of their Xbox online service that year?
December 11, 2025 at 1:34 AM
@jeffgerstmann.com @bradshoemaker.bsky.social @vinnycaravella.bsky.social I’m listening to an old Bombcast from 2010 and can you believe that Microsoft raised the price of their Xbox online service that year?
Watching my Pornhub Wrapped. Gonna be real awkward when I see my stepsister at Christmas this year.
December 10, 2025 at 2:08 PM
Watching my Pornhub Wrapped. Gonna be real awkward when I see my stepsister at Christmas this year.
Reposted by Unhappy John Candy
just watched a few dozen videos from the TikTok account of the people who own a caracal cat which very clearly should not be a pet and wants to kill them (every video is like this)
December 9, 2025 at 2:41 AM
just watched a few dozen videos from the TikTok account of the people who own a caracal cat which very clearly should not be a pet and wants to kill them (every video is like this)
Me (in my very best Nine Days voice): This is NPR News
December 9, 2025 at 1:45 AM
Me (in my very best Nine Days voice): This is NPR News
Reposted by Unhappy John Candy
Metroid Prime is just a scam by Big Vagina to sell more Vaginas.
December 5, 2025 at 9:42 PM
Metroid Prime is just a scam by Big Vagina to sell more Vaginas.
Reposted by Unhappy John Candy
When he says “hit it, Joe”, I don’t think first time viewers are going to be prepared for just how hard Joe hits it.
makes me weep to think of the gifts robbed from us because unaffordable housing has made it difficult for people to pursue their passions and hobbies
October 27, 2025 at 1:30 AM
When he says “hit it, Joe”, I don’t think first time viewers are going to be prepared for just how hard Joe hits it.
Reposted by Unhappy John Candy
the democrats have done more donation soliciting based on the admin going after mark kelly than they have done actual messaging, and that kind of gives the jig up about the party's priorities. they have the high ground and a winning message and all they can think about is squeezing donors for bucks
December 5, 2025 at 2:55 PM
the democrats have done more donation soliciting based on the admin going after mark kelly than they have done actual messaging, and that kind of gives the jig up about the party's priorities. they have the high ground and a winning message and all they can think about is squeezing donors for bucks
Reposted by Unhappy John Candy
just opened my Landlord Wrapped?!? why did they need to send this
December 4, 2025 at 1:08 AM
just opened my Landlord Wrapped?!? why did they need to send this
Reposted by Unhappy John Candy
Real Estate: Look Who You’ve Become
December 4, 2025 at 12:00 AM
Real Estate: Look Who You’ve Become
This is an incredible read, but how the Hell was “Stroke” available for the name of a magazine?
medicineiowa.org/fall-2020/he...
medicineiowa.org/fall-2020/he...
Helicopter vibrations launch stroke study
An everyday annoyance turned out to be a scientific discovery that could change the way clot-busting drugs are administered to stroke patients.
medicineiowa.org
December 3, 2025 at 11:02 PM
This is an incredible read, but how the Hell was “Stroke” available for the name of a magazine?
medicineiowa.org/fall-2020/he...
medicineiowa.org/fall-2020/he...
The McDonald’s ads in my podcasts about donating $4,000,000 worth of scholarship money had me thinking.
A Google search tells me that McDonald’s is worth roughly $215,150,000,000.
That’s 0.0018% of their total value.
A Google search tells me that McDonald’s is worth roughly $215,150,000,000.
That’s 0.0018% of their total value.
December 2, 2025 at 5:31 PM
The McDonald’s ads in my podcasts about donating $4,000,000 worth of scholarship money had me thinking.
A Google search tells me that McDonald’s is worth roughly $215,150,000,000.
That’s 0.0018% of their total value.
A Google search tells me that McDonald’s is worth roughly $215,150,000,000.
That’s 0.0018% of their total value.
Whoever taught my aunt how to use emojis is an asshole.
November 29, 2025 at 12:25 AM
Whoever taught my aunt how to use emojis is an asshole.
Reposted by Unhappy John Candy
Reposted by Unhappy John Candy
Was not expecting this blatant xenophobia on my tv first thing in the morning...
November 27, 2025 at 1:40 PM
Was not expecting this blatant xenophobia on my tv first thing in the morning...
At this point I’m not even here for the food, I’m just here to see the incredible collection of Tupperware the aunts bring out at the end of the meal.
November 27, 2025 at 7:00 PM
At this point I’m not even here for the food, I’m just here to see the incredible collection of Tupperware the aunts bring out at the end of the meal.
Cutting my cousin out of my life after she came out.
… as a fan of Pentatonix.
… as a fan of Pentatonix.
November 26, 2025 at 2:58 AM
Cutting my cousin out of my life after she came out.
… as a fan of Pentatonix.
… as a fan of Pentatonix.
Getting really mad because my seasonal depression hasn’t kicked in yet and have nothing to blame being an asshole on. Unless… unless I am just an asshole?
November 26, 2025 at 2:39 AM
Getting really mad because my seasonal depression hasn’t kicked in yet and have nothing to blame being an asshole on. Unless… unless I am just an asshole?
Reposted by Unhappy John Candy
Reposted by Unhappy John Candy
SOMEONE IS UPLOADING ALL OF THE SOUTH AFRICAN GLADIATORS EPISODES TO YOUTUBE
November 18, 2025 at 4:35 AM
SOMEONE IS UPLOADING ALL OF THE SOUTH AFRICAN GLADIATORS EPISODES TO YOUTUBE
Reposted by Unhappy John Candy
Free speech is more than me being allowed to say what I want. Everyone also has to like it and tell me I'm a smart and handsome boy
November 18, 2025 at 12:13 AM
Free speech is more than me being allowed to say what I want. Everyone also has to like it and tell me I'm a smart and handsome boy
Feels like I’m getting dangerously close to accidentally learning what a “labubu” is and I am terrified.
November 15, 2025 at 5:24 PM
Feels like I’m getting dangerously close to accidentally learning what a “labubu” is and I am terrified.
Reposted by Unhappy John Candy
[avengers mansion]
CAP: good morning Avengers let's begin
IRON MAN: wait spider-man is missing
OPEN MOUTH MAN: weird he was here when i went to sleep last nite
CAP: good morning Avengers let's begin
IRON MAN: wait spider-man is missing
OPEN MOUTH MAN: weird he was here when i went to sleep last nite
November 15, 2025 at 12:56 AM
[avengers mansion]
CAP: good morning Avengers let's begin
IRON MAN: wait spider-man is missing
OPEN MOUTH MAN: weird he was here when i went to sleep last nite
CAP: good morning Avengers let's begin
IRON MAN: wait spider-man is missing
OPEN MOUTH MAN: weird he was here when i went to sleep last nite
Reposted by Unhappy John Candy
Mark Epstein asked his brother Jeffrey Epstein whether Steve Bannon could confirm if Putin has “the photo of Trump blowing Bubba. Jeffrey Epstein: "I thought I had tsuris,” using the Yiddish term for troubles. #OpDeathEaters
![From:
Mark L. Epstein
Sent:
3/21/2018 2:54:13 PM
To:
'jeffrey E.' [jeevacation@gmail.com]
RE: hey
Subject:
High
I'd rather be in Donni Dee's shoes.
Importance:
From: jeffrey E. [mailto:jeevacation@gmail.com]
Sent: Wednesday, March 21, 2018 10:43 AM
To: Mark L. Epstein
Subject: Re: hey
you mean DONNI TEE
On Wed, Mar 21, 2018 at 9:54 AM, Mark L. Epstein
wrote:
You and your boy Donnie can make a remake of the movie Get Hard.
Sent via tin can and string.
On Mar 21, 2018, at 09:37, jeffrey E. <jeevacation@gmail.com>
wrote:
and i thought- I had tsuris
On Wed, Mar 21, 2018 at 4:32 AM, Mark L. Epstein
Ask him if Putin has the photos of Trump blowing Bubba?
wrote:
From: jeffrey E. [mailto:jeevacation@gmail.com]
Sent: Monday, March 19, 2018 2:15 PM
To:
Subject: Re: hey
All good. Bannon with me
On Mon, Mar 19, 2018 at 1:49 PM Mark L. Epstein
wrote:
How are you doing?
A while back you mentioned that you were prediabetic. Has anything changed with that?
What is your boy Donald up to now?
please note
HOUSE_OVERSIGHT_030719](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:6tu2htulhvnivixtdype45hs/bafkreiduqtjqd4axm4cgty4dgbtnpixgqq5brlzf76az5pqz6livps3hom@jpeg)
November 14, 2025 at 12:17 PM
Mark Epstein asked his brother Jeffrey Epstein whether Steve Bannon could confirm if Putin has “the photo of Trump blowing Bubba. Jeffrey Epstein: "I thought I had tsuris,” using the Yiddish term for troubles. #OpDeathEaters
Reposted by Unhappy John Candy
let me be the first to say we should not do a nazi jurassic park
November 14, 2025 at 4:07 AM
let me be the first to say we should not do a nazi jurassic park
Reposted by Unhappy John Candy
you could fact check this — there aren’t 30 million illegal immigrants and there is no evidence that the presence of an immigrant in say houston has any impact on housing in madison, wisconsin — or you could note straightforwardly that this is just nazi rhetoric
JD Vance: "A lot of young people are saying housing is way too expensive. Why is that? Because we flooded the country with 30 million illegal immigrants who were taking houses that ought by right go to American citizens."
November 13, 2025 at 10:12 PM
you could fact check this — there aren’t 30 million illegal immigrants and there is no evidence that the presence of an immigrant in say houston has any impact on housing in madison, wisconsin — or you could note straightforwardly that this is just nazi rhetoric