The Fishpants
@thefishpants.bsky.social
Obscure References, Fart Jokes and Swears*
*ᵃⁿᵈ ᵒᶜᶜᵃˢᶦᵒⁿᵃˡ ˢᵘʳᵖʳᶦˢᵉ "ᵖᵉⁿᶦˢ"
My Best Jokes (Allegedly):
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:c7efvddpc6qlokhzdkcpphwg/feed/aaaeubvvn5rcm
All:
bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaahooxkl375u
*ᵃⁿᵈ ᵒᶜᶜᵃˢᶦᵒⁿᵃˡ ˢᵘʳᵖʳᶦˢᵉ "ᵖᵉⁿᶦˢ"
My Best Jokes (Allegedly):
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:c7efvddpc6qlokhzdkcpphwg/feed/aaaeubvvn5rcm
All:
bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaahooxkl375u
Pinned
The Fishpants
@thefishpants.bsky.social
· Nov 14
A Hellboy sequel where he finally grows up to be Hellman so he can take over the family mayonnaise business
Reposted by The Fishpants
Growing up in a time when “selling out” was the most shameful thing you could do and then being forced to live through the 2020s feels like being kicked in the head by a horse every day
November 13, 2025 at 5:32 PM
Growing up in a time when “selling out” was the most shameful thing you could do and then being forced to live through the 2020s feels like being kicked in the head by a horse every day
Reposted by The Fishpants
This goes for pretty much every creature except cops to be fair
November 14, 2025 at 12:38 AM
This goes for pretty much every creature except cops to be fair
Reposted by The Fishpants
no no the toymaker is geppetto pinocchio is geppetto’s monster
November 13, 2025 at 9:17 AM
no no the toymaker is geppetto pinocchio is geppetto’s monster
Reposted by The Fishpants
I always get so fucken depressed in the weeks leading up to my birthday. I know this is a known phenomenon but heres the thing: it fucking sucks. Im trying to live my life but the sickly blanket of malaise weighs heavy on my shoulders. My soul smells like rotting leaves
November 13, 2025 at 4:25 PM
I always get so fucken depressed in the weeks leading up to my birthday. I know this is a known phenomenon but heres the thing: it fucking sucks. Im trying to live my life but the sickly blanket of malaise weighs heavy on my shoulders. My soul smells like rotting leaves
Reposted by The Fishpants
The itsy bitsy spider’s name is Sisyphus. Not many people know this.
November 13, 2025 at 11:36 AM
The itsy bitsy spider’s name is Sisyphus. Not many people know this.
Reposted by The Fishpants
In testing backyard wooden structures it’s important to have two groups. One gets an authentic, decorative round wooden shelter and the other gets a gacebo
In clown testing, it's important to have two treatment groups. One gets a genuine clown, and the other gets a placebozo.
November 13, 2025 at 1:15 PM
In testing backyard wooden structures it’s important to have two groups. One gets an authentic, decorative round wooden shelter and the other gets a gacebo
Reposted by The Fishpants
In clown testing, it's important to have two treatment groups. One gets a genuine clown, and the other gets a placebozo.
November 13, 2025 at 12:17 PM
In clown testing, it's important to have two treatment groups. One gets a genuine clown, and the other gets a placebozo.
Reposted by The Fishpants
Goooood morning, Bluesky! Today's episode is brought to you by Target. We here at Target are fully committed to the ultimate shopping experience. If you notice any associates not smiling, please report them to our compliance department.
November 13, 2025 at 1:15 PM
Goooood morning, Bluesky! Today's episode is brought to you by Target. We here at Target are fully committed to the ultimate shopping experience. If you notice any associates not smiling, please report them to our compliance department.
Reposted by The Fishpants
a girl should not have to work if it’s misty. She should be allowed to wander the moors wailing as nature intended
November 12, 2024 at 7:42 PM
a girl should not have to work if it’s misty. She should be allowed to wander the moors wailing as nature intended
Reposted by The Fishpants
It is Robert Louis Stevenson's birthday.
He was among the first storytellers to write about the duality of individuals - and how horrific that duality can be:
#WriterSky #BookSky #BOTD
He was among the first storytellers to write about the duality of individuals - and how horrific that duality can be:
#WriterSky #BookSky #BOTD
November 13, 2025 at 12:50 PM
It is Robert Louis Stevenson's birthday.
He was among the first storytellers to write about the duality of individuals - and how horrific that duality can be:
#WriterSky #BookSky #BOTD
He was among the first storytellers to write about the duality of individuals - and how horrific that duality can be:
#WriterSky #BookSky #BOTD
Reposted by The Fishpants
Sophia will not be denied
November 12, 2025 at 11:57 AM
Sophia will not be denied
Reposted by The Fishpants
Reposted by The Fishpants
ALL I WANT IS TO BE LOVED, YOU STUPID FUCKING CUNTS.
November 10, 2025 at 7:35 AM
ALL I WANT IS TO BE LOVED, YOU STUPID FUCKING CUNTS.
Reposted by The Fishpants
I'm 'seen people smoke in a hospital' years old
October 9, 2025 at 1:40 PM
I'm 'seen people smoke in a hospital' years old
Reposted by The Fishpants
art deco is short for arthur decoration. not many people know this
September 15, 2025 at 6:29 PM
art deco is short for arthur decoration. not many people know this
Reposted by The Fishpants
Roman doctors be like:
HE NEEDS A 4, STAT
HE NEEDS A 4, STAT
October 7, 2025 at 7:22 PM
Roman doctors be like:
HE NEEDS A 4, STAT
HE NEEDS A 4, STAT
Reposted by The Fishpants
Deer + bunny + cargo shorts = kangaroo
October 23, 2025 at 12:30 PM
Deer + bunny + cargo shorts = kangaroo
Reposted by The Fishpants
its always funny to me when people say college brainwashed their kids, considering it's the only place that actively taught me what critical thinking is and that you shouldnt just blindly trust stuff
November 11, 2025 at 3:22 PM
its always funny to me when people say college brainwashed their kids, considering it's the only place that actively taught me what critical thinking is and that you shouldnt just blindly trust stuff
Reposted by The Fishpants
“Why is literacy important?”
Socioeconomic Politics Nerd: *rambles on about civic engagement, material enrichment, individual well-being, etc*
Joyce Carol Oates: If you are literate, you can drive a billionaire into a mental breakdown!
Socioeconomic Politics Nerd: *rambles on about civic engagement, material enrichment, individual well-being, etc*
Joyce Carol Oates: If you are literate, you can drive a billionaire into a mental breakdown!
November 11, 2025 at 4:39 AM
“Why is literacy important?”
Socioeconomic Politics Nerd: *rambles on about civic engagement, material enrichment, individual well-being, etc*
Joyce Carol Oates: If you are literate, you can drive a billionaire into a mental breakdown!
Socioeconomic Politics Nerd: *rambles on about civic engagement, material enrichment, individual well-being, etc*
Joyce Carol Oates: If you are literate, you can drive a billionaire into a mental breakdown!
Reposted by The Fishpants
Wait… do the writers think that we think that the Daniel Craig bond and the Sean Connery bond are… the exact same person?
James Bond’s death in No Time to Die is causing a nightmare for the next film. Writers are stuck because Bond “was blown to pieces.”
Anthony Horowitz, author of three 007 novels, says:
“You can't have him wake up in shower and saying it was all a dream."
radaronline.com/p/james-bond...
Anthony Horowitz, author of three 007 novels, says:
“You can't have him wake up in shower and saying it was all a dream."
radaronline.com/p/james-bond...
November 11, 2025 at 11:17 AM
Wait… do the writers think that we think that the Daniel Craig bond and the Sean Connery bond are… the exact same person?
Reposted by The Fishpants
"it is what it is" is the "have a blessed day" of the north, i.e. "there is no hope for you "
November 11, 2025 at 12:04 PM
"it is what it is" is the "have a blessed day" of the north, i.e. "there is no hope for you "
Reposted by The Fishpants
i’ve never known anything my entire life and i prefer to keep it that way
November 11, 2025 at 2:28 AM
i’ve never known anything my entire life and i prefer to keep it that way
Reposted by The Fishpants
Reposted by The Fishpants
Hamburger helps those that help themselves
November 9, 2025 at 10:28 PM
Hamburger helps those that help themselves
Reposted by The Fishpants
Thro’ the Wood (John Atkinson Grimshaw, 1836 - 1893)
November 10, 2025 at 10:36 PM
Thro’ the Wood (John Atkinson Grimshaw, 1836 - 1893)