The Fishpants
@thefishpants.bsky.social
Obscure References, Fart Jokes and Swears*
*ᵃⁿᵈ ᵒᶜᶜᵃˢᶦᵒⁿᵃˡ ˢᵘʳᵖʳᶦˢᵉ "ᵖᵉⁿᶦˢ"
My Best Jokes (Allegedly):
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:c7efvddpc6qlokhzdkcpphwg/feed/aaaeubvvn5rcm
All:
bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaahooxkl375u
*ᵃⁿᵈ ᵒᶜᶜᵃˢᶦᵒⁿᵃˡ ˢᵘʳᵖʳᶦˢᵉ "ᵖᵉⁿᶦˢ"
My Best Jokes (Allegedly):
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:c7efvddpc6qlokhzdkcpphwg/feed/aaaeubvvn5rcm
All:
bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaahooxkl375u
Pinned
The Fishpants
@thefishpants.bsky.social
· Nov 14
A Hellboy sequel where he finally grows up to be Hellman so he can take over the family mayonnaise business
Reposted by The Fishpants
Hamburger helps those that help themselves
November 9, 2025 at 10:28 PM
Hamburger helps those that help themselves
Reposted by The Fishpants
Thro’ the Wood (John Atkinson Grimshaw, 1836 - 1893)
November 10, 2025 at 10:36 PM
Thro’ the Wood (John Atkinson Grimshaw, 1836 - 1893)
Reposted by The Fishpants
some girls are sugar and spice and everything nice,
i'm nonsense and shenanigans and whatever was in Kurt Cobain's cardigans
i'm nonsense and shenanigans and whatever was in Kurt Cobain's cardigans
November 8, 2025 at 12:09 AM
some girls are sugar and spice and everything nice,
i'm nonsense and shenanigans and whatever was in Kurt Cobain's cardigans
i'm nonsense and shenanigans and whatever was in Kurt Cobain's cardigans
Reposted by The Fishpants
While you're here- if you'd like an invite code to join the email service with the right attitude fuck.it while it's still exclusive, send an email to me: doof@fuck.it and tell me a joke. If I laugh, I'll send you a code. If I don't, you owe me your soul
[@fuck.it] - Email with Attitude. Pure. Secure. Exclusive.
[@fuck.it] is the email service that doesn’t track you, doesn’t sell your data and doesn’t give a fuck about what the world thinks you should be. Home to the coolest email address on the planet. Pure....
fuck.it
November 10, 2025 at 1:41 PM
While you're here- if you'd like an invite code to join the email service with the right attitude fuck.it while it's still exclusive, send an email to me: doof@fuck.it and tell me a joke. If I laugh, I'll send you a code. If I don't, you owe me your soul
Reposted by The Fishpants
Oh you thought I didn't have more? There are at least 1k hilarious accts on this app and I know all their middle names, okay?
November 10, 2025 at 1:36 PM
Oh you thought I didn't have more? There are at least 1k hilarious accts on this app and I know all their middle names, okay?
Reposted by The Fishpants
If you're not on that first one, don't be cry. I'm making three and it's really difficult finding all my people at 6 am. Here's list two. Some of my best friends aren't on either of these and I know it. Hang in there, it's coming
go.bsky.app/3KzRR2m
go.bsky.app/3KzRR2m
November 10, 2025 at 12:44 PM
If you're not on that first one, don't be cry. I'm making three and it's really difficult finding all my people at 6 am. Here's list two. Some of my best friends aren't on either of these and I know it. Hang in there, it's coming
go.bsky.app/3KzRR2m
go.bsky.app/3KzRR2m
Reposted by The Fishpants
Hey Friends, if you're looking for comedy, I've got you covered
November 10, 2025 at 12:40 PM
Hey Friends, if you're looking for comedy, I've got you covered
Reposted by The Fishpants
I always carry a piece of paper in my pocket just in case someone ever tries to attack me with a rock
December 2, 2024 at 11:31 AM
I always carry a piece of paper in my pocket just in case someone ever tries to attack me with a rock
Reposted by The Fishpants
Makes his own kimchi and likes the warm sound you only get with vinyl.
October 29, 2025 at 7:42 PM
Makes his own kimchi and likes the warm sound you only get with vinyl.
Reposted by The Fishpants
There should be a “skip to the point” button for conversations.
November 1, 2025 at 3:10 PM
There should be a “skip to the point” button for conversations.
Reposted by The Fishpants
Annual reminder.
If Christmas decorations were meant to go up in November then surely they'd be called novorations.
If Christmas decorations were meant to go up in November then surely they'd be called novorations.
November 4, 2025 at 10:24 AM
Annual reminder.
If Christmas decorations were meant to go up in November then surely they'd be called novorations.
If Christmas decorations were meant to go up in November then surely they'd be called novorations.
Reposted by The Fishpants
now that women have ruined the workplace we should just get rid of it
November 9, 2025 at 2:33 AM
now that women have ruined the workplace we should just get rid of it
Reposted by The Fishpants
Grief eventually leads to joy, which you'll know when you've cried so hard your nose makes a noise just like a clown's nose being honked
November 7, 2025 at 2:49 PM
Grief eventually leads to joy, which you'll know when you've cried so hard your nose makes a noise just like a clown's nose being honked
Reposted by The Fishpants
I found out recently my husband has been emailing me at the wrong address for over 4 years
November 7, 2025 at 7:51 PM
I found out recently my husband has been emailing me at the wrong address for over 4 years
As a kid, I never realized that the famous James Bond 'gun barrel' sequence was supposed to be a gun barrel. I thought he was just in a tunnel or something and it was the opening credits. Never occurred to me that we're supposed to be looking from inside the bad guy's gun. It doesn't make sense.
November 8, 2025 at 2:56 PM
As a kid, I never realized that the famous James Bond 'gun barrel' sequence was supposed to be a gun barrel. I thought he was just in a tunnel or something and it was the opening credits. Never occurred to me that we're supposed to be looking from inside the bad guy's gun. It doesn't make sense.
Reposted by The Fishpants
He’s shooting his friend in the face in the sky now
November 4, 2025 at 1:52 PM
He’s shooting his friend in the face in the sky now
Reposted by The Fishpants
a couple years ago i contracted with one of subway's ad agencies for a small rotating sandwiches collab that ultimately they decided not to publish and i never did anything with. today feels like a good day to post one of them. here's my favorite subway sandwich, the veggie delight
November 6, 2025 at 8:23 PM
a couple years ago i contracted with one of subway's ad agencies for a small rotating sandwiches collab that ultimately they decided not to publish and i never did anything with. today feels like a good day to post one of them. here's my favorite subway sandwich, the veggie delight
Reposted by The Fishpants
if you wish to attract people you must be a light and if when those people get close and realize it is a false light leading them into the rocks so their precious cargo can be stolen then that's kind of on them
November 6, 2025 at 11:12 PM
if you wish to attract people you must be a light and if when those people get close and realize it is a false light leading them into the rocks so their precious cargo can be stolen then that's kind of on them
Reposted by The Fishpants
Going honk shoo mi-mi-mi-mi-mi mode
November 2, 2025 at 2:52 AM
Going honk shoo mi-mi-mi-mi-mi mode
Reposted by The Fishpants
another day of learning a ton I didn't want to know about humanity
November 6, 2025 at 11:10 PM
another day of learning a ton I didn't want to know about humanity
Reposted by The Fishpants
VOICEOVER: in the criminal justice system, the people are represented by two separate, yet entirely opposite, groups: the police, who are afraid of sandwiches, and sandwich wielders, armed with food consisting of two pieces of bread filled with meat, cheese, and vegetables. these are their stories.
November 5, 2025 at 10:58 PM
VOICEOVER: in the criminal justice system, the people are represented by two separate, yet entirely opposite, groups: the police, who are afraid of sandwiches, and sandwich wielders, armed with food consisting of two pieces of bread filled with meat, cheese, and vegetables. these are their stories.
Reposted by The Fishpants
famous artwork but with a twist: thread
November 6, 2025 at 10:25 PM
famous artwork but with a twist: thread
November 6, 2025 at 11:01 PM
Reposted by The Fishpants
The three types of ‘50s pop songs were come on everybody let’s do the snap pea, if you ever kissed me I would turn into some goo, and hey hey beautiful child I would never take you over state lines
July 28, 2025 at 10:27 AM
The three types of ‘50s pop songs were come on everybody let’s do the snap pea, if you ever kissed me I would turn into some goo, and hey hey beautiful child I would never take you over state lines
