Pearl River Flow
@pearlriverflow.com
Self-employed unpaid intern. Tweets do not represent the views of my employer.
See pictures of SWAMP TRASH here!
https://www.pearlriverflow.com/gallery
See pictures of SWAMP TRASH here!
https://www.pearlriverflow.com/gallery
Pinned
Pearl River Flow
@pearlriverflow.com
· Jul 30
Enough with "I'm running on COMMON SENSE values." I want absurd values. Clowns on every train. Possum cops. The government pays in live goats. Worms in every gas tank. A war on clouds. It can't go any wronger than what we've already got going on, here.
Reposted by Pearl River Flow
(me, menacingly): you've read your last free article
February 10, 2026 at 7:18 PM
(me, menacingly): you've read your last free article
Reposted by Pearl River Flow
This is what it feels like to ditch your loser-ass friends at 7-11 after an annoying night out. Seeya later, bitches!
Plans to invade Greenland have just been cancelled after this
February 10, 2026 at 9:03 PM
This is what it feels like to ditch your loser-ass friends at 7-11 after an annoying night out. Seeya later, bitches!
Reposted by Pearl River Flow
Picard Seasons 1-2 vs Picard Season 3.
The way that the Rifftrax MST3K is coming together is very amusing to me, because the reboot was very clearly going “what if we tried to appeal to zoomers and millennials while also trying to rope in our old fans” and the Rifftrax version seems to be saying “what if we don’t”
February 10, 2026 at 9:22 PM
Picard Seasons 1-2 vs Picard Season 3.
Reposted by Pearl River Flow
Me: do you remember how sometimes the Apple II made a weird sound if you loaded the boot disk in the wrong drive
Discord age verifiers: this guy is trying too hard. He must be fifteen. Kill him.
Discord age verifiers: this guy is trying too hard. He must be fifteen. Kill him.
February 10, 2026 at 2:05 PM
Me: do you remember how sometimes the Apple II made a weird sound if you loaded the boot disk in the wrong drive
Discord age verifiers: this guy is trying too hard. He must be fifteen. Kill him.
Discord age verifiers: this guy is trying too hard. He must be fifteen. Kill him.
My D&D tables have had a surprising number of journalists, which goes very well when it's time to introduce a new NPC the party wants to question.
February 10, 2026 at 2:34 PM
My D&D tables have had a surprising number of journalists, which goes very well when it's time to introduce a new NPC the party wants to question.
Reposted by Pearl River Flow
Happy 13th anniversary to this pair of matching news headlines.
February 10, 2026 at 7:26 AM
Happy 13th anniversary to this pair of matching news headlines.
Reposted by Pearl River Flow
mr beast would secretly smuggle a xenomorph to earth
February 10, 2026 at 3:51 AM
mr beast would secretly smuggle a xenomorph to earth
Reposted by Pearl River Flow
$50 RECEIVED! I JUST NEED ANOTHER $50 NOW!
February 10, 2026 at 12:13 AM
$50 RECEIVED! I JUST NEED ANOTHER $50 NOW!
Reposted by Pearl River Flow
I'm gonna run for POTUS on the platform of trying the current admin for treason & reestablishing America as Snack Capital of the World. We will fund the best scientists to develop snacks that can finally beat Asia's. Even these vegan Korean yangnyeom chicken puffs shaped like little drumsticks
February 10, 2026 at 12:35 AM
I'm gonna run for POTUS on the platform of trying the current admin for treason & reestablishing America as Snack Capital of the World. We will fund the best scientists to develop snacks that can finally beat Asia's. Even these vegan Korean yangnyeom chicken puffs shaped like little drumsticks
Reposted by Pearl River Flow
Best writing, academic or popular, about floodplains?
February 10, 2026 at 12:27 AM
Best writing, academic or popular, about floodplains?
I've got a lot of new followers! Welcome! I talk about Mississippi a lot, and I use the real county names, because there's a ton of mistakes that end up on maps on the internet. So if you need to talk about our state, PLEASE use the OFFICIAL map of the REAL county names in Mississippi!
February 10, 2026 at 12:04 AM
I've got a lot of new followers! Welcome! I talk about Mississippi a lot, and I use the real county names, because there's a ton of mistakes that end up on maps on the internet. So if you need to talk about our state, PLEASE use the OFFICIAL map of the REAL county names in Mississippi!
Reposted by Pearl River Flow
General von Paulus, when Hitler demanded to know why he lost the Battle of Stalingrad:
They’re constantly growing new single guys on a big farm
February 9, 2026 at 11:37 PM
General von Paulus, when Hitler demanded to know why he lost the Battle of Stalingrad:
That's because it's really Gifshor county
February 10, 2026 at 12:00 AM
That's because it's really Gifshor county
Reposted by Pearl River Flow
Know who needs to be shamed? All people shaming people who have to beg for their survival online. Oh that fucks up your viewing experience? They're leeches who need to get a job? Glad life's a piece of cake for you. You sound every bit the rancid selfish capitalist who's the reason folks need help.
February 9, 2026 at 11:23 PM
Know who needs to be shamed? All people shaming people who have to beg for their survival online. Oh that fucks up your viewing experience? They're leeches who need to get a job? Glad life's a piece of cake for you. You sound every bit the rancid selfish capitalist who's the reason folks need help.
Reposted by Pearl River Flow
get used to it, giant lobsters!
February 9, 2026 at 11:31 PM
get used to it, giant lobsters!
Reposted by Pearl River Flow
Remember, Bluesky is still a little sensitive.
November 14, 2024 at 11:43 PM
Remember, Bluesky is still a little sensitive.
Reposted by Pearl River Flow
Websites and forums are good.
Can't have forums because we have Reddit, we can't have community sites now because everyone needs to be at twitter, can't even have something as simple as a personal webpage now because almost no one uses the internet that isn't in the same 7-10 sites at most.
February 9, 2026 at 11:07 PM
Websites and forums are good.
Reposted by Pearl River Flow
A camera doorbell does not protect anything. It’s a passive recording! It allows you to get mad at the Amazon driver for putting your shitty package where you didn’t want it! Throw them shits in the goddam trash!
February 9, 2026 at 10:21 PM
A camera doorbell does not protect anything. It’s a passive recording! It allows you to get mad at the Amazon driver for putting your shitty package where you didn’t want it! Throw them shits in the goddam trash!
Reposted by Pearl River Flow
we did get this out of it tho
February 9, 2026 at 2:11 PM
we did get this out of it tho
I unironically love this movie and you NEED to see this poster. The helmets are as good as it gets. This is Roger Corman's finest film, this is his Knightrider.
February 9, 2026 at 11:06 PM
I unironically love this movie and you NEED to see this poster. The helmets are as good as it gets. This is Roger Corman's finest film, this is his Knightrider.
YOU KNOW YOU LIKE STANDPLAAT'S THREADS
STILL AT JUST 10% OF THE WEEKEND GOAL
200/3000 // 100/1000
PP IN BIO, KO-FI HERE: ko-fi.com/standplaatsk...
200/3000 // 100/1000
PP IN BIO, KO-FI HERE: ko-fi.com/standplaatsk...
Support Standplaats Krakow
Support Standplaats Krakow
ko-fi.com
February 9, 2026 at 1:53 PM
YOU KNOW YOU LIKE STANDPLAAT'S THREADS
Reposted by Pearl River Flow
Last year I traveled all the way to rural Vietnam to officiate a friend's wedding. It was a beautiful ceremony that mixed cultures and language, and was a celebration of the best of humanity.
He just sent me this post and said "this is how you lost the war."
He just sent me this post and said "this is how you lost the war."
February 9, 2026 at 1:27 PM
Last year I traveled all the way to rural Vietnam to officiate a friend's wedding. It was a beautiful ceremony that mixed cultures and language, and was a celebration of the best of humanity.
He just sent me this post and said "this is how you lost the war."
He just sent me this post and said "this is how you lost the war."
Reposted by Pearl River Flow
Reposted by Pearl River Flow
The oldest known image of an owl:
More than 30,000 years ago, someone skillfully scratched the figure of a long-eared owl (Asio otus) into the soft outer layer of the walls of Chauvet Cave, France. The owl is looking backward over their wings, head turned 180 degrees
carnegiemnh.org/ancient-owl-...
More than 30,000 years ago, someone skillfully scratched the figure of a long-eared owl (Asio otus) into the soft outer layer of the walls of Chauvet Cave, France. The owl is looking backward over their wings, head turned 180 degrees
carnegiemnh.org/ancient-owl-...
February 8, 2026 at 6:08 PM
The oldest known image of an owl:
More than 30,000 years ago, someone skillfully scratched the figure of a long-eared owl (Asio otus) into the soft outer layer of the walls of Chauvet Cave, France. The owl is looking backward over their wings, head turned 180 degrees
carnegiemnh.org/ancient-owl-...
More than 30,000 years ago, someone skillfully scratched the figure of a long-eared owl (Asio otus) into the soft outer layer of the walls of Chauvet Cave, France. The owl is looking backward over their wings, head turned 180 degrees
carnegiemnh.org/ancient-owl-...
Lots of people are saying "but they played 'American Idiot" but that's not controversial. We all know.
Green Day avoids making political statement during Super Bowl 2026 opening performance
Green Day avoids making political statement during Super Bowl 2026 opening performance
A rocking start to the Super Bowl.
pagesix.com
February 9, 2026 at 12:18 AM
Lots of people are saying "but they played 'American Idiot" but that's not controversial. We all know.