jordan [ham]
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nursemurderer.bsky.social
jordan [ham]
@nursemurderer.bsky.social
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living that cutie patootie life
happy Black History Month
February 1, 2026 at 6:59 PM
Reposted by jordan [ham]
whatever you do don’t ask their age
February 1, 2026 at 7:34 AM
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Me: Time to make the bed...

Cat: MAY I ASSIST BY SCREAMING EVERY 10 SECONDS
January 2, 2025 at 7:36 PM
if one more influencer tries to convince me on some hot mess like cottage cheese and greek yogurt in a sweet potato while this world is doing what the fuck it is doing, I will burn this shit down
February 1, 2026 at 5:04 AM
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“you can’t ignore your problems forever” i can actually
January 31, 2026 at 8:44 PM
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Me: trying to read.
The edible I ate an hour ago: initiating interdimensional travel.
January 31, 2026 at 2:24 AM
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Heated rivalry between myself and spicy potato chips.
January 31, 2026 at 3:22 AM
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Guess I don’t get a soft girl era. Thanks Obama
January 31, 2026 at 8:08 PM
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(Girls FTW)
January 31, 2026 at 8:56 PM
today’s workout brought to you by: sunbathing w neighbors after yesterdays 24 hour flu (?), and please keep the unrest going everyone bc I love seeing videos from my community barricading ice in parking garages 💀
February 1, 2026 at 1:55 AM
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Living in the moment, watching the way fire flirts with the unpaid bills I’ve just tossed into the wood stove
January 31, 2026 at 2:53 PM
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My take-out receipt just insulted me twice
January 31, 2026 at 7:45 PM
if you ever see me on a horse just know me and the horse have no idea how I got there
January 31, 2026 at 7:48 PM
attempted today’s workout, wearing my america hates us burning flag hat, got in the pool and felt off immediately. so glad I made it out of water before the food poisoning or virus started pouring out of me 😭 FUCK ICE fuck everything. sad for us bc Catherine O’Hara is gone, but so happy for her 💔
January 30, 2026 at 10:17 PM
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I get tired of saying it, but I’ll say it again: the nature of oppression in America is that they workshop it first on Black, Latino, Asian & Native people.

But it is always, in the end, coming for everyone.
The arrests of journalists Don Lemon and Georgia Fort are a test for every MSM member with a platform. If you are not voicing your outrage at this blatant violation of the First Amendment, you are utterly discredited as a journalist.
January 30, 2026 at 4:46 PM
wait now the government is arresting journalists for covering the news in minnesota? I don’t think that’s an american sentence.
January 30, 2026 at 5:46 PM
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it's rude that so many old people are the same age as me
January 27, 2026 at 5:58 PM
remember when trump like defunded the post office or am I just stoned
January 30, 2026 at 12:02 AM
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I no longer think of men as attractive or not.

It’s

“Worth the trouble it will inevitably bring”
January 29, 2026 at 11:40 PM
when even the british ppl need clarification
January 29, 2026 at 8:13 PM
tinder has taught me there are lots of nigerians looking for someone ✨like me✨
January 29, 2026 at 7:24 PM
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I have no idea what I mean by anything.
January 29, 2026 at 5:30 AM
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If anyone has a cure or help with anxiety that isn't a substance I don't have on hand and can't get or an empty platitude like "calm down" or meditating with my bhole to the sun, I am all ears
January 29, 2026 at 3:42 PM
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Doctors without hors d'oeuvres
January 29, 2026 at 6:06 PM