xian cochran
@melferburque.bsky.social
weirdo in a weird land. commie pinko dirtbag. asexual. bipolar. he/him
Pinned
my friend is trying to say she’s a “zennial” because she’s cusp to gen z and millennial and she doesn’t believe us that xennial means gen x to millennial
February 8, 2026 at 11:17 PM
my friend is trying to say she’s a “zennial” because she’s cusp to gen z and millennial and she doesn’t believe us that xennial means gen x to millennial
the free turkey my friend got from grocery outlet is inedible. I cut into it and the breast looked undead. brownish grey. right in the trash.
February 8, 2026 at 10:26 PM
the free turkey my friend got from grocery outlet is inedible. I cut into it and the breast looked undead. brownish grey. right in the trash.
go hawks or something
February 8, 2026 at 10:24 PM
go hawks or something
rewatching monarch legacy of monsters and it kills me how cate meets her literal "dead" grandmother at the same age as her, and when asked legit said "I didn't expect to be alive"
I dunno if I fell down a hole and woke up next to a long dead relative, my first thought would be "shit, I dead."
I dunno if I fell down a hole and woke up next to a long dead relative, my first thought would be "shit, I dead."
February 8, 2026 at 5:52 PM
rewatching monarch legacy of monsters and it kills me how cate meets her literal "dead" grandmother at the same age as her, and when asked legit said "I didn't expect to be alive"
I dunno if I fell down a hole and woke up next to a long dead relative, my first thought would be "shit, I dead."
I dunno if I fell down a hole and woke up next to a long dead relative, my first thought would be "shit, I dead."
lol know who else doesn’t win elections? “moderate” democrats.
A little sensitive, are we? Purity tests don't win elections regardless of the cause.
February 8, 2026 at 1:48 AM
lol know who else doesn’t win elections? “moderate” democrats.
Reposted by xian cochran
protest sign ideas:
How Much Did You Spend On Those Supplements
You Are Fighting On The Side Of The People Who Invented Microtransactions
I Care More About Your Wellbeing Than Any Of The Guys Next To You And I Want To See You Bled Dry
You Know Exactly How Fragile A Human Body Is By Now Don't You
How Much Did You Spend On Those Supplements
You Are Fighting On The Side Of The People Who Invented Microtransactions
I Care More About Your Wellbeing Than Any Of The Guys Next To You And I Want To See You Bled Dry
You Know Exactly How Fragile A Human Body Is By Now Don't You
February 8, 2026 at 1:29 AM
protest sign ideas:
How Much Did You Spend On Those Supplements
You Are Fighting On The Side Of The People Who Invented Microtransactions
I Care More About Your Wellbeing Than Any Of The Guys Next To You And I Want To See You Bled Dry
You Know Exactly How Fragile A Human Body Is By Now Don't You
How Much Did You Spend On Those Supplements
You Are Fighting On The Side Of The People Who Invented Microtransactions
I Care More About Your Wellbeing Than Any Of The Guys Next To You And I Want To See You Bled Dry
You Know Exactly How Fragile A Human Body Is By Now Don't You
Reposted by xian cochran
I love it when people cancel plans with me so I can both bemoan my abandonment and not have to go out at the same time.
February 7, 2026 at 7:23 PM
I love it when people cancel plans with me so I can both bemoan my abandonment and not have to go out at the same time.
vinegar is the gar of the vine
February 8, 2026 at 12:26 AM
vinegar is the gar of the vine
Reposted by xian cochran
tapping the sign:
There are only four types of "AI" companies:
1) The Obvious Scam
2) Three Chatbots in a Trench Coat
3) We're Calling it AI for the Investors
4) Yes, It's the Mechanical Turk Again
1) The Obvious Scam
2) Three Chatbots in a Trench Coat
3) We're Calling it AI for the Investors
4) Yes, It's the Mechanical Turk Again
February 7, 2026 at 3:31 AM
tapping the sign:
Reposted by xian cochran
In one of our signal chats, a neighbor calls these “fuckaroundabouts”
Minneapolis residents are trying a new tactic to slow and deter federal agents from entering city neighborhoods. Called filter blockades, they’re pop-up block parties in the middle of city streets, and they’ve already earned the ire of Trump border czar Tom Homan (1) www.mprnews.org/story/2026/0...
Neighbors: Blockades are pop-up parties that also slow down ICE agents
Organizers are trying a new tactic to slow and deter federal agents from entering city neighborhoods: pop-up block parties in the middle of city streets. Tom Homan, the Trump administration border cza...
www.mprnews.org
February 6, 2026 at 4:38 PM
In one of our signal chats, a neighbor calls these “fuckaroundabouts”
Reposted by xian cochran
fuck the police. kill ice. marry the fire department
February 7, 2026 at 5:26 AM
fuck the police. kill ice. marry the fire department
Reposted by xian cochran
THIS IS SO FRICKEN COOL!!!!!!!
February 7, 2026 at 12:23 AM
THIS IS SO FRICKEN COOL!!!!!!!
Reposted by xian cochran
Finneas is better at political messaging than 99% of the Democratic consultants in DC.
February 6, 2026 at 8:44 PM
Finneas is better at political messaging than 99% of the Democratic consultants in DC.
had a nice little project lined up to take up my afternoon and was just told "nah we did it already" and now I gotta find busywork
February 6, 2026 at 8:44 PM
had a nice little project lined up to take up my afternoon and was just told "nah we did it already" and now I gotta find busywork
I’ve never curled but I’m pretty sure I could beat a baby
OK pause on the timeline because everyone needs to see the curling baby from one of the Olympic matches today
February 6, 2026 at 8:14 PM
I’ve never curled but I’m pretty sure I could beat a baby
dunno who this “nardo grey” asshole is but I want to slap him silly for that ugly ass car paint
February 6, 2026 at 7:43 PM
dunno who this “nardo grey” asshole is but I want to slap him silly for that ugly ass car paint
Reposted by xian cochran
"MY OTHER TAB IS PORNHUB"
February 6, 2026 at 6:30 AM
"MY OTHER TAB IS PORNHUB"
Reposted by xian cochran
Sunny Day Police State
Was this very mid-2000s emo person press-ganged into ICE servitude?
February 6, 2026 at 5:11 AM
Sunny Day Police State
Reposted by xian cochran
ACAB for Cutie
Was this very mid-2000s emo person press-ganged into ICE servitude?
February 6, 2026 at 5:22 AM
ACAB for Cutie
Reposted by xian cochran
Bright ICE
Was this very mid-2000s emo person press-ganged into ICE servitude?
February 6, 2026 at 5:22 AM
Bright ICE
why the fuck is their no “previously on” recap of shrinking?
February 6, 2026 at 5:12 AM
why the fuck is their no “previously on” recap of shrinking?
Reposted by xian cochran
Oh my, gang did you know that not having money makes you poor
February 5, 2026 at 4:37 AM
Oh my, gang did you know that not having money makes you poor
Reposted by xian cochran
I am sorry to announce that I will no longer be editing the Washington Post’s “Undesirables and Degenerates Wanted by the Authorities for Questioning” column.
February 5, 2026 at 4:40 AM
I am sorry to announce that I will no longer be editing the Washington Post’s “Undesirables and Degenerates Wanted by the Authorities for Questioning” column.
Reposted by xian cochran
I hope Hulk Hogan is watching this in hell
February 5, 2026 at 3:25 AM
I hope Hulk Hogan is watching this in hell
Reposted by xian cochran
Oh my GOD, the White House copied our ad but made it completely deranged.
The Nazi slop factory is all out of ideas! SAD!
The Nazi slop factory is all out of ideas! SAD!
February 5, 2026 at 4:05 AM
Oh my GOD, the White House copied our ad but made it completely deranged.
The Nazi slop factory is all out of ideas! SAD!
The Nazi slop factory is all out of ideas! SAD!