Martti Nelson, Lady Author
@martti.bsky.social
Always and Forever with Her | I write funny books for misbehaving women: ATTACK OF THE ROM-COM & LYSSA STRATA + @mcsweeneys @BelladonnaComedy @slackjaw | She/Hers | marttinelson.com
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Introducing CaptainAI, Now with RarelyDieTM Update v7.3
“I wish I was as pale as Elon Musk, who invented gasoline.”
maladymartti.medium.com
I wrote a thing! ✈️ Introducing CaptainAI, Now with RarelyDieTM Update v7.3
Elon is supppper helping me with my fear of flying hahahahauuuhggghhhhh. #writersofbluesky #satire #humor #authorsofbluesky #booktok
maladymartti.medium.com/introducing-...
Elon is supppper helping me with my fear of flying hahahahauuuhggghhhhh. #writersofbluesky #satire #humor #authorsofbluesky #booktok
maladymartti.medium.com/introducing-...
“The most common objectives…were immigration reform and a sharper focus on domestic issues – healthcare reform, cutting fraud in public programs and lowering the national debt – over foreign policy.”
These fucking morons think he’s gonna fix healthcare and CUT FRAUD. I don’t even know what to say.
These fucking morons think he’s gonna fix healthcare and CUT FRAUD. I don’t even know what to say.
February 10, 2026 at 4:23 PM
“The most common objectives…were immigration reform and a sharper focus on domestic issues – healthcare reform, cutting fraud in public programs and lowering the national debt – over foreign policy.”
These fucking morons think he’s gonna fix healthcare and CUT FRAUD. I don’t even know what to say.
These fucking morons think he’s gonna fix healthcare and CUT FRAUD. I don’t even know what to say.
Can’t we just make the fascists morons stay around each other and stop endangering the rest of us? Could solve a lot of problems.
February 10, 2026 at 4:10 PM
Can’t we just make the fascists morons stay around each other and stop endangering the rest of us? Could solve a lot of problems.
Reposted by Martti Nelson, Lady Author
Kid Rock and Ricky Martin are the same age
February 10, 2026 at 2:37 AM
Kid Rock and Ricky Martin are the same age
Reposted by Martti Nelson, Lady Author
Siri, what happens when you fire all the Black and Brown smart people from newsrooms?
Analysis: Weeks before he set foot on the stage, Bad Bunny’s halftime performance had already become a media event.
But if you were looking for political commentary, the closest that you got was when he said “God bless America” in English.
But if you were looking for political commentary, the closest that you got was when he said “God bless America” in English.
Analysis | Bad Bunny’s Super Bowl halftime show was expected to provoke. Did it?
The Bad Bunny Super Bowl show nodded to injustices in Puerto Rico but mostly evoked wholesome family values that meshed with the more sentimental commercials.
www.washingtonpost.com
February 10, 2026 at 1:53 AM
Siri, what happens when you fire all the Black and Brown smart people from newsrooms?
Everyone else will have flying cars, America will have breeding farms and shackles.
February 10, 2026 at 12:40 AM
Everyone else will have flying cars, America will have breeding farms and shackles.
She earned her spot. Shoo
February 10, 2026 at 12:04 AM
She earned her spot. Shoo
Reposted by Martti Nelson, Lady Author
Reposted by Martti Nelson, Lady Author
There is a major political organization allied with the president that got so mad a Latino artist was tapped to play at the Super Bowl they made a whole alternative show. We should all take a moment to reflect on that. It is so blatantly racist.
February 9, 2026 at 3:43 AM
There is a major political organization allied with the president that got so mad a Latino artist was tapped to play at the Super Bowl they made a whole alternative show. We should all take a moment to reflect on that. It is so blatantly racist.
I've never interacted with either thing and yet I just retreated into myself like a nauseated turtle.
February 9, 2026 at 2:42 AM
I've never interacted with either thing and yet I just retreated into myself like a nauseated turtle.
Have you watched Palm Royale? Ricky is one of the stars of the show, and it’s fantastic. He’s wonderful in it.
February 9, 2026 at 2:12 AM
Have you watched Palm Royale? Ricky is one of the stars of the show, and it’s fantastic. He’s wonderful in it.
Reposted by Martti Nelson, Lady Author
judge a quarterback by whether or not he defrauds millions of dollars from poor people
February 8, 2026 at 8:26 PM
judge a quarterback by whether or not he defrauds millions of dollars from poor people
“Tee hee me woman! BAD at doing things and such. Thank goodness for lying bot machine! I can have it think for me, and also make me pretty in bikini shots! I need a manicure. I be shopping!”
February 9, 2026 at 12:49 AM
“Tee hee me woman! BAD at doing things and such. Thank goodness for lying bot machine! I can have it think for me, and also make me pretty in bikini shots! I need a manicure. I be shopping!”
It’s a volume play. In KU, you get paid per page read. So if someone reads 10 pages and then gives up, you still got paid. If you’re putting out a slop book once a day, it’s going to add up.
February 8, 2026 at 11:21 PM
It’s a volume play. In KU, you get paid per page read. So if someone reads 10 pages and then gives up, you still got paid. If you’re putting out a slop book once a day, it’s going to add up.
Reposted by Martti Nelson, Lady Author
MLMLLM
To be very clear, that lady in the NYT article is not making any money with her hundreds of AI slop books.
She makes money by *convincing people* she makes money that way and getting them to pay her to teach them how to do it.
It's an evolved MLM, and the NYT is helping market it.
She makes money by *convincing people* she makes money that way and getting them to pay her to teach them how to do it.
It's an evolved MLM, and the NYT is helping market it.
February 8, 2026 at 10:27 PM
MLMLLM
The AI could’ve stolen it from the many books of mine they have stolen.
February 8, 2026 at 8:37 PM
The AI could’ve stolen it from the many books of mine they have stolen.
I’m told I’m a weirdo freak on the regular. It’s a badge of honor for me.
February 8, 2026 at 8:37 PM
I’m told I’m a weirdo freak on the regular. It’s a badge of honor for me.
Tech incels wanna whine about rejection?
a close up of a man with a mustache
Alt: a close up of a man with a mustache who breaks into uncontrollable laughter
media.tenor.com
February 8, 2026 at 8:36 PM
Tech incels wanna whine about rejection?
Reposted by Martti Nelson, Lady Author
The point of the AI project is to provoke despair in creative people. They haven’t produced profits or anything anyone wants, just a steady stream of articles about how us artistic types can’t do the thing we’re already doing, making art. Jokes on them, we’re even better at despair than they are.
February 8, 2026 at 6:24 PM
The point of the AI project is to provoke despair in creative people. They haven’t produced profits or anything anyone wants, just a steady stream of articles about how us artistic types can’t do the thing we’re already doing, making art. Jokes on them, we’re even better at despair than they are.
No AI could be as damn. weird as I am. AI ain’t funny. Except accidentally. And I doubt it’s gonna be feminist, considering all the sources.
February 8, 2026 at 8:35 PM
No AI could be as damn. weird as I am. AI ain’t funny. Except accidentally. And I doubt it’s gonna be feminist, considering all the sources.
Yay another excuse for troglodytes to consider romance nothing more than worthless porn. I agree, fuck this lady, fuck Amazon, fuck all of this bullshit. It is disgusting to further steal on the backs of all the authors who have been stolen from. Like mine. IDK if that was grammatical but fuck
February 8, 2026 at 8:07 PM
Yay another excuse for troglodytes to consider romance nothing more than worthless porn. I agree, fuck this lady, fuck Amazon, fuck all of this bullshit. It is disgusting to further steal on the backs of all the authors who have been stolen from. Like mine. IDK if that was grammatical but fuck
Reposted by Martti Nelson, Lady Author
“Renee was not the first person killed, and she was not the last,” Becca Good said. “You know my wife’s name and you know Alex’s name, but there are many others in this city being harmed that you don’t know — their families are hurting just like mine, even if they don’t look like mine.”
Renee Good's partner addresses Minneapolis immigration crackdown one month after killing
Becca Good has seldom spoken out since Renee Good was shot and killed by an ICE agent in Minneapolis on Jan. 7.
nbcnews.to
February 7, 2026 at 9:00 PM
“Renee was not the first person killed, and she was not the last,” Becca Good said. “You know my wife’s name and you know Alex’s name, but there are many others in this city being harmed that you don’t know — their families are hurting just like mine, even if they don’t look like mine.”
I’d say “the stupidest man on earth,” but the competition for that title is the only good thing these moron fascists do.
February 8, 2026 at 1:14 AM
I’d say “the stupidest man on earth,” but the competition for that title is the only good thing these moron fascists do.
I love the plant nursery. If I can make a living by working in the plant nursery and just being filthy all the time, I would. But I’m pretty sure they’re not looking for middle-aged broads. Who are 5 feet tall.
February 7, 2026 at 8:50 PM
I love the plant nursery. If I can make a living by working in the plant nursery and just being filthy all the time, I would. But I’m pretty sure they’re not looking for middle-aged broads. Who are 5 feet tall.
I am spending the day playing in dirt, worm castings, and chickenshit. It’s spring planting, baby!
a man is playing a guitar in a garden surrounded by flowers
Alt: a man is playing a guitar in a garden surrounded by happy muppet flowers
media.tenor.com
February 7, 2026 at 6:58 PM
I am spending the day playing in dirt, worm castings, and chickenshit. It’s spring planting, baby!