Han Solo Cup
@hansolocup.bsky.social
Specializing in niche jokes.
It’s me. I’m the niche.
It’s me. I’m the niche.
Pinned
Han Solo Cup
@hansolocup.bsky.social
· Nov 15
Him: how do you want your eggs?
Me: outside the control of the patriarchy
Him: so definitely not poached?
Me: outside the control of the patriarchy
Him: so definitely not poached?
Reposted by Han Solo Cup
I dreamt I was a lesbian skeleton sledder last night and I won “Best in Show” at the Olympics???
February 17, 2026 at 7:41 PM
I dreamt I was a lesbian skeleton sledder last night and I won “Best in Show” at the Olympics???
Reposted by Han Solo Cup
i enjoyed the giggles, but could have done without the shits
February 12, 2026 at 5:47 PM
i enjoyed the giggles, but could have done without the shits
Hello tinnitus my old friend
A few more shows until the end
Because a ringing loudly pealing
Is interfering with my sleeping
And the damage that was planted in my ears
It’s souvenirs
Of the sound of concerts
A few more shows until the end
Because a ringing loudly pealing
Is interfering with my sleeping
And the damage that was planted in my ears
It’s souvenirs
Of the sound of concerts
February 12, 2026 at 3:02 PM
Hello tinnitus my old friend
A few more shows until the end
Because a ringing loudly pealing
Is interfering with my sleeping
And the damage that was planted in my ears
It’s souvenirs
Of the sound of concerts
A few more shows until the end
Because a ringing loudly pealing
Is interfering with my sleeping
And the damage that was planted in my ears
It’s souvenirs
Of the sound of concerts
Reposted by Han Solo Cup
Recently, there have been several stick-ups and one Axe murder (in the first Degree). Management has made no Secret of the need to increase security, but still haven’t found the Right Guard. Finding themselves underarmed, the crime wave continues to roll on.
February 12, 2026 at 2:09 PM
Recently, there have been several stick-ups and one Axe murder (in the first Degree). Management has made no Secret of the need to increase security, but still haven’t found the Right Guard. Finding themselves underarmed, the crime wave continues to roll on.
Reposted by Han Solo Cup
Advice is like a sexually transmitted disease. Nobody wants it but there's always someone around to give it to you.
February 12, 2026 at 2:39 PM
Advice is like a sexually transmitted disease. Nobody wants it but there's always someone around to give it to you.
Reposted by Han Solo Cup
If James Blunt can’t roll a joint I’m absolutely done
February 16, 2025 at 7:31 PM
If James Blunt can’t roll a joint I’m absolutely done
Reposted by Han Solo Cup
[office canteen]
coworker: I hope you don’t mind but I used your mug as mine’s dirty
me: of course not, and I’m sure you don’t mind that as my wife has a headache I used yours instead
coworker: I hope you don’t mind but I used your mug as mine’s dirty
me: of course not, and I’m sure you don’t mind that as my wife has a headache I used yours instead
February 12, 2026 at 2:41 PM
[office canteen]
coworker: I hope you don’t mind but I used your mug as mine’s dirty
me: of course not, and I’m sure you don’t mind that as my wife has a headache I used yours instead
coworker: I hope you don’t mind but I used your mug as mine’s dirty
me: of course not, and I’m sure you don’t mind that as my wife has a headache I used yours instead
My air sax solo on the Motels “Only the Lonely” will make you fall in love.
February 11, 2026 at 2:30 PM
My air sax solo on the Motels “Only the Lonely” will make you fall in love.
Reposted by Han Solo Cup
space heater? good luck with that
February 5, 2026 at 10:34 PM
space heater? good luck with that
Coworkers: I would do anything for lunch
Me: yes! Arby’s!
Coworkers: but I won’t do that
Me: yes! Arby’s!
Coworkers: but I won’t do that
February 5, 2026 at 9:07 PM
Coworkers: I would do anything for lunch
Me: yes! Arby’s!
Coworkers: but I won’t do that
Me: yes! Arby’s!
Coworkers: but I won’t do that
Continents are just big islands #sososcience
February 4, 2026 at 2:28 PM
Continents are just big islands #sososcience
Ice storm warning in Atlanta, not sure if I should salt my driveway or hide my immigrants
January 24, 2026 at 11:52 PM
Ice storm warning in Atlanta, not sure if I should salt my driveway or hide my immigrants
ICE: not a well-regulated militia since 2003
January 24, 2026 at 11:23 PM
ICE: not a well-regulated militia since 2003
Who invented the slow-closing toilet seat? Not all heroes wear capes, but you should.
January 24, 2026 at 10:20 PM
Who invented the slow-closing toilet seat? Not all heroes wear capes, but you should.
I just used a waffle iron to make a panini, so yes, I am all about innovation.
January 21, 2026 at 7:43 PM
I just used a waffle iron to make a panini, so yes, I am all about innovation.
Sometimes I wonder what I’d do without Cheerios
January 20, 2026 at 1:54 PM
Sometimes I wonder what I’d do without Cheerios
Reposted by Han Solo Cup
3:07 am : *sits bolt upright in bed*
TOO MUCH SOUP IS A SLURPLUS
*immediately falls back into deep sleep*
TOO MUCH SOUP IS A SLURPLUS
*immediately falls back into deep sleep*
January 14, 2026 at 11:43 PM
3:07 am : *sits bolt upright in bed*
TOO MUCH SOUP IS A SLURPLUS
*immediately falls back into deep sleep*
TOO MUCH SOUP IS A SLURPLUS
*immediately falls back into deep sleep*
Reposted by Han Solo Cup
I’m kinda shy at first but get to know me and you’ll be surprised to find that I’m also quite unpleasant, and sometimes just a straight-up asshole.
May 8, 2025 at 1:00 AM
I’m kinda shy at first but get to know me and you’ll be surprised to find that I’m also quite unpleasant, and sometimes just a straight-up asshole.
Reposted by Han Solo Cup
Bringing the gassy vibes
January 17, 2026 at 2:59 AM
Bringing the gassy vibes
Real people that have annoyed me #1:
Pronounces pizza like peeza
Says “the powers to be”
Declawed their cats
Pronounces pizza like peeza
Says “the powers to be”
Declawed their cats
January 16, 2026 at 1:21 PM
Real people that have annoyed me #1:
Pronounces pizza like peeza
Says “the powers to be”
Declawed their cats
Pronounces pizza like peeza
Says “the powers to be”
Declawed their cats
Reposted by Han Solo Cup
"you should eat more vegetables" yeah well maybe vegetables should put more effort into being edible, did they ever think about that
January 16, 2026 at 1:15 PM
"you should eat more vegetables" yeah well maybe vegetables should put more effort into being edible, did they ever think about that
Reposted by Han Solo Cup
My new debate team hasn’t met yet because we keep going back-and-forth on when-and-where. We might be too good at this…
January 11, 2026 at 5:38 PM
My new debate team hasn’t met yet because we keep going back-and-forth on when-and-where. We might be too good at this…
Reposted by Han Solo Cup
I don’t know why Tolkien called a meeting of wizards “the white council” when “staff meeting” was right there.
December 13, 2025 at 4:27 PM
I don’t know why Tolkien called a meeting of wizards “the white council” when “staff meeting” was right there.
Reposted by Han Solo Cup
I bought a blazer today. If you need to unfollow, I understand. 😔
January 10, 2026 at 9:18 PM
I bought a blazer today. If you need to unfollow, I understand. 😔
Reposted by Han Solo Cup
Stop scrolling and drink some water. Eat a banana. Make banana bread. Eat a peanut butter and banana sandwich. Honestly, I have too many bananas. I need help with all these bananas.
January 10, 2026 at 9:17 PM
Stop scrolling and drink some water. Eat a banana. Make banana bread. Eat a peanut butter and banana sandwich. Honestly, I have too many bananas. I need help with all these bananas.