James Blackstone
@blackstonejn.bsky.social
PhD Circus Clown, MD, DDS, OPP, Yeah you know me, word to your recently retired mother
Reposted by James Blackstone
social justice urologist: power to the peehole!
February 11, 2026 at 8:17 PM
social justice urologist: power to the peehole!
Reposted by James Blackstone
my drafts are worse than my sex life but with more witnesses
February 11, 2026 at 2:22 PM
my drafts are worse than my sex life but with more witnesses
Me: Would be nice to not wake up everyday in the part of a dystopian novel where scientists are warning of imminent catastrophe and leaders are ignoring them.
Customer Service Agent: Sir, I don’t get paid enough to deal with your existential crisis.
Customer Service Agent: Sir, I don’t get paid enough to deal with your existential crisis.
February 11, 2026 at 3:45 PM
Me: Would be nice to not wake up everyday in the part of a dystopian novel where scientists are warning of imminent catastrophe and leaders are ignoring them.
Customer Service Agent: Sir, I don’t get paid enough to deal with your existential crisis.
Customer Service Agent: Sir, I don’t get paid enough to deal with your existential crisis.
Reposted by James Blackstone
If you don't fully bake your butthole, you run the risk of E. coli
February 11, 2026 at 3:35 PM
If you don't fully bake your butthole, you run the risk of E. coli
Reposted by James Blackstone
In France a Peeping Tom is called a Jean Luc Peek Hard
February 11, 2026 at 3:27 PM
In France a Peeping Tom is called a Jean Luc Peek Hard
Reposted by James Blackstone
Been saying "uh oh" a worrying amount lately
February 11, 2026 at 2:04 PM
Been saying "uh oh" a worrying amount lately
Reposted by James Blackstone
It's less like a draft folder and more like a brain fart folder.
February 11, 2026 at 2:45 PM
It's less like a draft folder and more like a brain fart folder.
Reposted by James Blackstone
No son, they are not "magically delicious." The workers made them delicious. This is a slogan meant to mystify the social conditions of labor
February 11, 2026 at 1:46 AM
No son, they are not "magically delicious." The workers made them delicious. This is a slogan meant to mystify the social conditions of labor
Reposted by James Blackstone
me: they’re just-
wife: don’t say it
me: ...
wife: I mean it
me: ...
wife: ...
me: lion there
wife: don’t say it
me: ...
wife: I mean it
me: ...
wife: ...
me: lion there
February 11, 2026 at 1:39 PM
me: they’re just-
wife: don’t say it
me: ...
wife: I mean it
me: ...
wife: ...
me: lion there
wife: don’t say it
me: ...
wife: I mean it
me: ...
wife: ...
me: lion there
Reposted by James Blackstone
having your city noticed by the president is now a natural disaster on par with a hurricane or major flood
February 11, 2026 at 2:12 PM
having your city noticed by the president is now a natural disaster on par with a hurricane or major flood
Pretty soon half-baked butthole jokes as far as the eye can see
February 11, 2026 at 2:04 PM
Pretty soon half-baked butthole jokes as far as the eye can see
Reposted by James Blackstone
I went to clear the snow from my son’s car and I took his drivers wiper clear off, so if you’re looking for a helper, I’m available.
February 11, 2026 at 12:38 PM
I went to clear the snow from my son’s car and I took his drivers wiper clear off, so if you’re looking for a helper, I’m available.
Reposted by James Blackstone
Just passed a Baskin Robbin’s that had a sign in the window that said “NO CASH KEPT IN STORE OVERNIGHT.” Please! Like I’d be breaking in for cash!
February 10, 2026 at 10:01 PM
Just passed a Baskin Robbin’s that had a sign in the window that said “NO CASH KEPT IN STORE OVERNIGHT.” Please! Like I’d be breaking in for cash!
Reposted by James Blackstone
why should i give a shit about a country that can't even open a Hardee's in Los Angeles
February 10, 2026 at 9:35 PM
why should i give a shit about a country that can't even open a Hardee's in Los Angeles
Reposted by James Blackstone
hey man keep your pompatus in your pants nobody wants to see that thing
February 10, 2026 at 5:14 PM
hey man keep your pompatus in your pants nobody wants to see that thing
Gotta like how George Lucas took all the ambiguity out in the prequels as to what it meant to be a Jedi that the original films relied on. “Oh, you thought they were a bunch of mystical knights? Nope, just a group of dudes in gees that muffed it because they didn’t see this guy coming.”
a man 's face is shown in a make a gif.com gif
Alt: Palpatine doing a weird smile
media.tenor.com
February 10, 2026 at 4:15 PM
Gotta like how George Lucas took all the ambiguity out in the prequels as to what it meant to be a Jedi that the original films relied on. “Oh, you thought they were a bunch of mystical knights? Nope, just a group of dudes in gees that muffed it because they didn’t see this guy coming.”
Reposted by James Blackstone
“if i died right now, you guys, i want you all to know, tell everybody that she died sad” -vicki gunvalson, philosopher
February 10, 2026 at 10:42 AM
“if i died right now, you guys, i want you all to know, tell everybody that she died sad” -vicki gunvalson, philosopher
Reposted by James Blackstone
A coworker says “Great Morning” instead of “Good Morning” and I feel like that should be a fireable offense.
February 10, 2026 at 2:51 PM
A coworker says “Great Morning” instead of “Good Morning” and I feel like that should be a fireable offense.
Reposted by James Blackstone
After watching American Ninja Warrior I don't think my son has what it takes to be a ninja. I'd never tell him of course. But deep down, he'll know
February 10, 2026 at 2:25 PM
After watching American Ninja Warrior I don't think my son has what it takes to be a ninja. I'd never tell him of course. But deep down, he'll know
“It has been a privilege and an honor,” he says before taking the last bite of steak sandwich.
February 10, 2026 at 2:15 PM
“It has been a privilege and an honor,” he says before taking the last bite of steak sandwich.
Reposted by James Blackstone
my grandmother died in 1992 so i have no idea if i’ve continued to get more handsome since then
February 10, 2026 at 1:49 PM
my grandmother died in 1992 so i have no idea if i’ve continued to get more handsome since then
Reposted by James Blackstone
I already have a full time job, it’s called anxiety
February 9, 2026 at 11:55 PM
I already have a full time job, it’s called anxiety
Reposted by James Blackstone
Went outside to watch the last fuck I had to give fly away.
I hope it visits once in a while.
I hope it visits once in a while.
February 9, 2026 at 6:54 PM
Went outside to watch the last fuck I had to give fly away.
I hope it visits once in a while.
I hope it visits once in a while.
Reposted by James Blackstone
In my defense, he said "I was talking to chatgpt" your honor
February 9, 2026 at 2:36 PM
In my defense, he said "I was talking to chatgpt" your honor