TheAncientMethuzelah
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ancientmethuzelah.bsky.social
TheAncientMethuzelah
@ancientmethuzelah.bsky.social
Sometimes known as Funline. 🇦🇺🏳️‍🌈

The Woke left is putting Ice in your water
Reposted by TheAncientMethuzelah
reading about the effects of cutting USAID. i think a painting of elon musk should be hung in public for everyone to see. a painting of elon musk should be put up against a wall and shot with a nice camera
February 14, 2026 at 9:40 PM
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This is probably ok
February 14, 2026 at 9:31 PM
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No son, they are not "magically delicious." The workers made them delicious. This is a slogan meant to mystify the social conditions of labor
February 11, 2026 at 1:46 AM
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It was transforming the biggest NFL stage in the world into a sugar cane plantation that did it for me.

Like, the multiple layers of turning an American icon into a plantation and highlighting the history of exploitation of Black and Brown bodies by the NFL and American colonialism simultaneously?
February 9, 2026 at 1:54 AM
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Only one who got the ball into the end zone was Bad Bunny
February 9, 2026 at 1:32 AM
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“Mr. Beast Salesforce ad” - they’re calling it the least appealing phrase ever assembled in any language. They finally did it
February 9, 2026 at 2:32 AM
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OK "god bless america" and then naming every country in the americas from south to north is absolute king shit
February 9, 2026 at 1:33 AM
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🇺🇸
February 7, 2026 at 1:59 PM
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Virginia State Senator Louise Lucas is just a delight on every level
February 7, 2026 at 3:36 AM
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GM: Charisma check.

Mamdani: [rolls natural 20]

GM: that’s a d6 how did you

Mamdani: [direct to camera] Did you know you can check out board games at your local public library? 😊
February 7, 2026 at 5:01 AM
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production of The Muppet Show should not be dependent on petty vulgarities like “ratings” or “revenue.” it should be preserved as a vital function of american culture. it should have a taxpayer-funded budget rivaling the CIA
February 7, 2026 at 12:40 AM
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I may delete this because it’s a bit spicy but it shouldn’t be lost on us that games being turned into TV is essentially harvesting the stories written by those who don’t have union representation or healthcare with WGA by those that do. Our stories are good enough for TV but the writers aren’t?
February 6, 2026 at 1:59 AM
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SCORPION: take me across the river
FROG: if I do that, you'll sting me
S: if I sting you, we'll both drown
F: ok, that makes sense
*halfway across the river*
F: so?
S: so what?
F: sting me
S: what?
F: sting me, like you promised
S: no
F: sting me so we'll both drown
S: *crying* what is happening?
February 6, 2026 at 4:27 AM
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I’m not sure we’ve properly addressed how profoundly disturbing it is that America can largely shrug at the stashing of human beings in giant warehouses.
February 6, 2026 at 5:12 AM
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February 6, 2026 at 10:47 AM
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I hope Dems begin to see that moderate or progressive, AIPAC is not our friend.

They endorse January 6th insurrectionists. Yet if you so much as suggest the US uphold its own Leahy laws, no matter your record, they will work against you.
February 6, 2026 at 2:52 PM
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Like, I find this refreshing and charming and all of that. But it also strikes me as the way a normal human would react to a baby doing cute stuff? I feel like you could win any election right now by just being a normal person.
February 6, 2026 at 4:55 AM
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i always love it when liberals critique me for being part of some leftist hive mind when like, I voted exclusively for Democrats. I told other people I thought it was best to vote for Democrats.

The Democrats lost. And they didn't lose because leftists refused to vote for them.
February 6, 2026 at 7:25 AM
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The Wright Museums Instagram page is HILARIOUS. Think The Office but it's the staff at a Museum for Black History. Better believe this is on my list of places to visit.
Gentle Spades
"I'm a veteran"
February 6, 2026 at 8:23 AM
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I realized that a lot of the guys who have been found in the Epstein files are probably really struggling because the guy they would have gone to for advice about being discovered in the Epstein files was JEFFREY EPSTEIN
Over the past two weeks I've begun to realize that rich people only started funding chatbots once they could no longer email Jeffrey Epstein
February 6, 2026 at 4:23 AM
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i am trying not to joke about the Epstein stuff because it's so horrible but there's also this ridiculous element where it's like... discovering Dracula is real, he's taken over human society at the highest levels, he's involved in tons of evil and also he's a huge dipshit
February 5, 2026 at 3:43 AM
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Abolish ICE is too confusing. What we meant to say is that "no masks should be deployed in an arbitrary and capricious fashion."
Yes. Yes! Thank you
February 5, 2026 at 1:59 AM
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Bezos isn't destroying the Washington Post because it isn't profitable. He's destroying the Washington Post because he's calculated that a robust free press threatens the ability of his class to warp society around their interests
February 4, 2026 at 2:24 PM
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worth noting that the second rich people stopped being afraid of mobs tearing them limb from limb, they stopped building libraries and opera houses and stuff and started ripping the copper wiring out of the walls of society instead
February 4, 2026 at 4:44 PM
Reposted by TheAncientMethuzelah
Every day Mamdani comes out and is like "hey guys, I turned off the orphan-crushing machine. Literally just had to flip a switch. Took less than 5 minutes."

After decades of dem leadership pissing and moaning and fundraising about how complex an issue it is and how difficult the process is etc
February 3, 2026 at 3:58 AM