robertus
@robertus.bsky.social
Copy editor ordinaire, he/him, hockey official, hobby medievalist, sometime writer of words in a sequence, New Yorker in Maryland, sublime dot idealist at the gee mail.
Ring situation, gotta share it or else they'll crawl out of my computer monitor in 7 days.
I just saw this photo and now you have to see this photo
November 15, 2025 at 1:16 AM
Ring situation, gotta share it or else they'll crawl out of my computer monitor in 7 days.
Today's earworm www.youtube.com/watch?v=RU4U...
Over It
YouTube video by Tori Amos - Topic
www.youtube.com
November 14, 2025 at 5:22 PM
Today's earworm www.youtube.com/watch?v=RU4U...
Reposted by robertus
Some jackwagon is not gonna put him on his first HoF ballot, and we should find that guy and pelt him with rocks
SHOHEI OHTANI IS THE ONLY PLAYER TO WIN MVP UNANIMOUSLY MULTIPLE TIMES … HE’S NOW DONE SO FOUR TIMES
November 14, 2025 at 12:34 AM
Some jackwagon is not gonna put him on his first HoF ballot, and we should find that guy and pelt him with rocks
Reposted by robertus
holy shit you guys look at the zamboni at my local hockey rink; the arena manager reached out to Pearl Jam for a sponsorship and got it and now we have a JAMBONI ZAMBONI
November 13, 2025 at 3:16 AM
holy shit you guys look at the zamboni at my local hockey rink; the arena manager reached out to Pearl Jam for a sponsorship and got it and now we have a JAMBONI ZAMBONI
Reposted by robertus
ever since I learned about three-cueing I've developed infinitely more patience for replies on social media. mfers literally do not know how to read. people are walking around conjuring random meanings into words they don't know, and they don't know a lot of words. it's crazy
November 11, 2025 at 6:15 PM
ever since I learned about three-cueing I've developed infinitely more patience for replies on social media. mfers literally do not know how to read. people are walking around conjuring random meanings into words they don't know, and they don't know a lot of words. it's crazy
Reposted by robertus
I filled out an MTA lost property form, but if anyone saw a blue Mets jacket on the eastbound Q 45 today, or the Q 44 in either direction (I got lost!), Or at the corner of Main Street and Union Turnpike, or the southbound corner of Lafayette Avenue and the Hutchinson River Parkway…hit me up!
November 13, 2025 at 8:43 PM
I filled out an MTA lost property form, but if anyone saw a blue Mets jacket on the eastbound Q 45 today, or the Q 44 in either direction (I got lost!), Or at the corner of Main Street and Union Turnpike, or the southbound corner of Lafayette Avenue and the Hutchinson River Parkway…hit me up!
Reposted by robertus
FUCK!!!
My beloved Mets jacket, that my dad got me years ago, apparently fell off at some point while I was on or between a bus today!
❗️REWARD ❗️
(Details in next skeet)
My beloved Mets jacket, that my dad got me years ago, apparently fell off at some point while I was on or between a bus today!
❗️REWARD ❗️
(Details in next skeet)
November 13, 2025 at 8:41 PM
FUCK!!!
My beloved Mets jacket, that my dad got me years ago, apparently fell off at some point while I was on or between a bus today!
❗️REWARD ❗️
(Details in next skeet)
My beloved Mets jacket, that my dad got me years ago, apparently fell off at some point while I was on or between a bus today!
❗️REWARD ❗️
(Details in next skeet)
Reposted by robertus
I want to very gently say something, and I hope nobody will be mad: If somebody on the internet says something that is NOT about politics and NOT about how terrible everything is, it’s a kindness not to reflexively make a comment (in jest or not) that brings it back to those things.
November 13, 2025 at 2:10 AM
I want to very gently say something, and I hope nobody will be mad: If somebody on the internet says something that is NOT about politics and NOT about how terrible everything is, it’s a kindness not to reflexively make a comment (in jest or not) that brings it back to those things.
Reposted by robertus
Hey so “underage girls” are…children. The word you’re looking for is children. They’re not like, women-in-waiting or women-lite or whatever. They’re children. I think some of you are very uncomfortable with what that means for you but it is still true.
November 12, 2025 at 11:05 PM
Hey so “underage girls” are…children. The word you’re looking for is children. They’re not like, women-in-waiting or women-lite or whatever. They’re children. I think some of you are very uncomfortable with what that means for you but it is still true.
As evidenced by all the conspirators conspiring
Bobo is finally catching on.
"My understanding is that the relentless pressure campaign that has included carrot, stick, good cop, bad cop, has made her even more dug in, suspicious and convinced there's a conspiracy at play."
www.rawstory.com/lauren-boebe...
"My understanding is that the relentless pressure campaign that has included carrot, stick, good cop, bad cop, has made her even more dug in, suspicious and convinced there's a conspiracy at play."
www.rawstory.com/lauren-boebe...
Lauren Boebert 'convinced' Epstein conspiracy afoot as Trump pressure backfires
Rep. Lauren Boebert (R-CO) is reportedly "convinced" that there is a conspiracy to cover up files on sex offender Jeffrey Epstein.The lawmaker is one of a handful of Republicans supporting a discharge...
www.rawstory.com
November 13, 2025 at 1:51 AM
As evidenced by all the conspirators conspiring
Reposted by robertus
The attorney general and the FBI director, a manosphere podcaster bro, pulled into the situation room a member of Congress best known for getting kicked out of a Beetlejuice musical for drunkenly giving her date a handy, in order to pressure her about the president's child sex trafficking scandal.
November 12, 2025 at 11:23 PM
The attorney general and the FBI director, a manosphere podcaster bro, pulled into the situation room a member of Congress best known for getting kicked out of a Beetlejuice musical for drunkenly giving her date a handy, in order to pressure her about the president's child sex trafficking scandal.
Jaws, Jaws 2, Jaws 3D, and Jaws: The Revenge
Pope Leo has shared his four favorite movies of all time, as the Vatican prepares to host dozens of actors and directors in a “World of Cinema” gathering on Saturday at his official residence. See which films made the pope's list. nyti.ms/4p3exK9
Pope Leo Shares His Favorite Movies Ahead of Vatican Event
The list leans heavily on uplifting classics.
nyti.ms
November 12, 2025 at 1:38 AM
Jaws, Jaws 2, Jaws 3D, and Jaws: The Revenge
Reposted by robertus
spoke with the executive director of my local food bank today and got this really incredible line: "if you donate 1 can of green beans, we can give away 1 can of green beans. but if you donate a dollar, we can give away 6 cans of green beans"
November 10, 2025 at 7:32 PM
spoke with the executive director of my local food bank today and got this really incredible line: "if you donate 1 can of green beans, we can give away 1 can of green beans. but if you donate a dollar, we can give away 6 cans of green beans"
Reposted by robertus
The dilemma of being one of Kim Kardashian’s psychics and knowing she’s paying you to say “you’re going to pass the bar exam!” meanwhile all the ghosts and spirits in the room are hollering “SHE DOESNT EVEN KNOW WHAT TORTS ARE”
Kim Kardashian slams psychics who told her she'd pass the bar exam: 'All fucking full of shit'
Kim Kardashian slams psychics who told her she'd pass the bar exam: 'All f---ing full of s---'
'All f---ing full of s---': Kim Kardashian has some choice words for the psychics who predicted she'd pass the bar exam.
ew.com
November 11, 2025 at 5:02 PM
The dilemma of being one of Kim Kardashian’s psychics and knowing she’s paying you to say “you’re going to pass the bar exam!” meanwhile all the ghosts and spirits in the room are hollering “SHE DOESNT EVEN KNOW WHAT TORTS ARE”
Reposted by robertus
Convincing you to read my novel with the first sentence. Share yours if you want.
(Here's the opening of "Wearing The Lion.")
(Here's the opening of "Wearing The Lion.")
November 11, 2025 at 11:47 AM
Convincing you to read my novel with the first sentence. Share yours if you want.
(Here's the opening of "Wearing The Lion.")
(Here's the opening of "Wearing The Lion.")
Reposted by robertus
second verse on this is one of the funniest things i've ever heard
November 9, 2025 at 3:10 PM
second verse on this is one of the funniest things i've ever heard
Old and busted: Bronzer
New hotness: Jugalo
New hotness: Jugalo
November 10, 2025 at 9:18 PM
Old and busted: Bronzer
New hotness: Jugalo
New hotness: Jugalo
Reposted by robertus
Reposted by robertus
Hi writers! I’m looking to assign a couple of features for Slate before the end of the year. If you have anything in mind that you think would be a fit please send me a pitch! Jenée.Desmond- harris@slate.com or dm me.
RTs are appreciated so this can reach more people. Thanks!
RTs are appreciated so this can reach more people. Thanks!
November 10, 2025 at 6:06 PM
Hi writers! I’m looking to assign a couple of features for Slate before the end of the year. If you have anything in mind that you think would be a fit please send me a pitch! Jenée.Desmond- harris@slate.com or dm me.
RTs are appreciated so this can reach more people. Thanks!
RTs are appreciated so this can reach more people. Thanks!
Reposted by robertus
One of the reasons Marie Kondo's advice made everyone mad in 2018-19 (Apart from Racism™️) was that for many, getting to a point where they can even feel joy takes +5 years of therapy and access to the good drugs.
Of course, Marie addresses this...🧵
Of course, Marie addresses this...🧵
November 10, 2025 at 12:51 PM
One of the reasons Marie Kondo's advice made everyone mad in 2018-19 (Apart from Racism™️) was that for many, getting to a point where they can even feel joy takes +5 years of therapy and access to the good drugs.
Of course, Marie addresses this...🧵
Of course, Marie addresses this...🧵
Reposted by robertus
I’m told “the Pedolands” has already been suggested and yeah, that’s the winner
My fantasy football chat discussing Trump at the Commanders game
November 9, 2025 at 11:47 PM
I’m told “the Pedolands” has already been suggested and yeah, that’s the winner
Reposted by robertus
Bills losing to a coach that literally said this
November 9, 2025 at 7:20 PM
Bills losing to a coach that literally said this