@lazyjane.bsky.social
Reposted
The unifying theory of all American conservatives is that they all demand that you be their friends at gunpoint, and tell them how handsome and special they are
September 16, 2025 at 3:38 PM
The unifying theory of all American conservatives is that they all demand that you be their friends at gunpoint, and tell them how handsome and special they are
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Republicans: WE NOMINATE SKELETOR
Democrats: We dislike Skeletor but we will vote to confirm him. Please give us between 5 and 50 dollars.
<Later>
Democrats: I stand before you to condemn the actions of Skeletor. He should have never been given this power. Please give me between 5 and 50 dollars.
Democrats: We dislike Skeletor but we will vote to confirm him. Please give us between 5 and 50 dollars.
<Later>
Democrats: I stand before you to condemn the actions of Skeletor. He should have never been given this power. Please give me between 5 and 50 dollars.
June 13, 2025 at 4:58 AM
Republicans: WE NOMINATE SKELETOR
Democrats: We dislike Skeletor but we will vote to confirm him. Please give us between 5 and 50 dollars.
<Later>
Democrats: I stand before you to condemn the actions of Skeletor. He should have never been given this power. Please give me between 5 and 50 dollars.
Democrats: We dislike Skeletor but we will vote to confirm him. Please give us between 5 and 50 dollars.
<Later>
Democrats: I stand before you to condemn the actions of Skeletor. He should have never been given this power. Please give me between 5 and 50 dollars.
Reposted
you’re laughing?? The conservative leader of Canada who had a landslide in the polls three months ago has lost his seat and you’re LAUGHING?
April 29, 2025 at 8:53 AM
you’re laughing?? The conservative leader of Canada who had a landslide in the polls three months ago has lost his seat and you’re LAUGHING?
THANK GOD
IT IS OFFICIAL
CBC NEWS IS PROJECTING A LIBERAL PARTY GOVERNMENT
CBC NEWS IS PROJECTING A LIBERAL PARTY GOVERNMENT
April 29, 2025 at 2:20 AM
THANK GOD
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Reposted
Me, smirking at the bear devouring my flesh: So you actually can’t do that it’s illegal. Focus on economics
January 28, 2025 at 3:39 PM
Me, smirking at the bear devouring my flesh: So you actually can’t do that it’s illegal. Focus on economics
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Why is she the only Democrat who's like this. What the fuck do we need Democrats for if they're not like this.
One thing about me is that I will fight Nazis until I’m six feet in the ground.
January 24, 2025 at 1:50 AM
Why is she the only Democrat who's like this. What the fuck do we need Democrats for if they're not like this.
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AOC: Trans girls are girls. And for all the folks that are so concerned, thank you for your concern for women for the first time. I don't know who has been to gym class, I’ve played co-ed sports all the time
January 14, 2025 at 6:33 PM
AOC: Trans girls are girls. And for all the folks that are so concerned, thank you for your concern for women for the first time. I don't know who has been to gym class, I’ve played co-ed sports all the time
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Elon Musk: Why isn’t there enough water in California?
Grok (burning through an entire lake to generate an answer): Wokeness
Grok (burning through an entire lake to generate an answer): Wokeness
January 9, 2025 at 3:15 AM
Elon Musk: Why isn’t there enough water in California?
Grok (burning through an entire lake to generate an answer): Wokeness
Grok (burning through an entire lake to generate an answer): Wokeness
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it genuinely sucks that basically nothing on the internet works well anymore. search? barely works. social media? filled with garbage engagement-bait designed to game the algorithm. news websites? pages that refresh at random or so covered in video ads that it’s impossible to read stories
January 8, 2025 at 3:38 AM
it genuinely sucks that basically nothing on the internet works well anymore. search? barely works. social media? filled with garbage engagement-bait designed to game the algorithm. news websites? pages that refresh at random or so covered in video ads that it’s impossible to read stories
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🎵 ooh baby do you know what that's worth
December 6, 2024 at 4:01 PM
🎵 ooh baby do you know what that's worth
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This cannot be overstated: if you've seen anything about trans people via the newspapers, BBC, government ministers, or even bookshops - most of it isn't merely inaccurate, it's deliberate, calculated, malicious lies and propaganda, or baseless bigoted conspiracy theories at best.
If you're cis, one thing I'd like to impart with regards to trans people is that you are being lied to on an almost unfathomable scale, from billionaires like Musk, to religious fundamentalist groups, to print and broadcast media, to entire governments, they're committed to spreading malinformation.
Literally this.
If you are a cis person, even if you are an expert in some field that affects trans people, and you *think* you know some facts about trans people, I can almost guarantee you believe some things that are insanely wrong.
If you are a cis person, even if you are an expert in some field that affects trans people, and you *think* you know some facts about trans people, I can almost guarantee you believe some things that are insanely wrong.
December 6, 2024 at 8:22 PM
This cannot be overstated: if you've seen anything about trans people via the newspapers, BBC, government ministers, or even bookshops - most of it isn't merely inaccurate, it's deliberate, calculated, malicious lies and propaganda, or baseless bigoted conspiracy theories at best.
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Watching "Hot Frosty" and this is the font used in the official medical records about Lacey Chabert's dead husband who died from cancer that the sentient snowman finds.
November 20, 2024 at 2:38 AM
Watching "Hot Frosty" and this is the font used in the official medical records about Lacey Chabert's dead husband who died from cancer that the sentient snowman finds.
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me *driving past the apocalypse*: Horses
October 21, 2024 at 6:27 PM
me *driving past the apocalypse*: Horses
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November 14, 2024 at 4:24 AM
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Will the detective investigating your murder be sad?
October 7, 2023 at 5:22 PM
Will the detective investigating your murder be sad?
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H.P. Lovecraft: Your limited human mind cannot comprehend Cthulhu
Me: (comprehending easily) Squid guy
Me: (comprehending easily) Squid guy
October 1, 2023 at 5:23 PM
H.P. Lovecraft: Your limited human mind cannot comprehend Cthulhu
Me: (comprehending easily) Squid guy
Me: (comprehending easily) Squid guy
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In any group protesting for something good, if there’s a single objectionable thing said or done, the entire protest is illegitimate. But in a group of torch-bearing fascists, if there’s even one person I think has a valid complaint, the entire group must get a sympathetic hearing.
My favorite part of these is the litany of disqualifying caveats. "Yes the anecdotes I'm cherry-picking aren't representative ... but what if they were?"
May 5, 2024 at 2:17 PM
In any group protesting for something good, if there’s a single objectionable thing said or done, the entire protest is illegitimate. But in a group of torch-bearing fascists, if there’s even one person I think has a valid complaint, the entire group must get a sympathetic hearing.
Reposted
[winces]
![This is not who we are as a campus community. When [NAME OF COLONIAL SLAVE OWNER] founded our college as a [SEMINARY / FARMING AND ANIMAL HUSBANDRY TECHNICAL COLLEGE] in [YEAR OF FOUNDING WHEN NEITHER WOMEN NOR STUDENTS OF COLOR WERE ALLOWED TO ENROLL], he bravely coined our motto: [LATIN PLATITUDE THAT OVER THE YEARS HAS BECOME A RUNNING JOKE AMONG STUDENTS AND FACULTY]. These wise words have guided our mission ever since and rang in my ears as I called in the [CAMPUS POLICE / MUNICIPAL POLICE / NATIONAL GUARD / PRIVATE MILITIA HIGHERED BY BOOSTERS OF THE FOOTBALL TEAM] to use [EUPHEMISTIC REFERENCE TO MILITARY-GRADE WEAPONS] on the enemy infiltrators.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:kok4aqdr3qnsj6ktfkq76kqz/bafkreifpqotcudffpkjhkzuabvx5regysymk2wdrnknk54invvmefvnjgu@jpeg)
May 2, 2024 at 3:00 PM
[winces]
I have played 45 hours of Stardew Valley in the last three weeks. Help.
December 5, 2023 at 6:53 PM
I have played 45 hours of Stardew Valley in the last three weeks. Help.