Larry’s Twin
@larrystwin99.bsky.social
Yes, that Larry.
I am not leaving my wife. Unless something better comes along. Which I hope is TODAY. Single dad. Top salesman for Tupperware.
I am not leaving my wife. Unless something better comes along. Which I hope is TODAY. Single dad. Top salesman for Tupperware.
Reposted by Larry’s Twin
Love me, love me, saaaaaay that you love me
September 8, 2025 at 12:15 PM
Love me, love me, saaaaaay that you love me
Reposted by Larry’s Twin
i’m actually just 7 problems wrapped in a trench coat
September 8, 2025 at 12:14 PM
i’m actually just 7 problems wrapped in a trench coat
Reposted by Larry’s Twin
It would definitely make a Wednesday Addams playlist.
September 8, 2025 at 1:44 PM
It would definitely make a Wednesday Addams playlist.
Imagine if Cyndi Lauper were Goth the song would be Girls Just Want to Have Funerals.
September 8, 2025 at 1:24 PM
Imagine if Cyndi Lauper were Goth the song would be Girls Just Want to Have Funerals.
Imagine going to Ohio. On purpose.
August 28, 2025 at 3:05 PM
Imagine going to Ohio. On purpose.
My pullout game is so good I win at Jenga all the time.
August 22, 2025 at 6:43 PM
My pullout game is so good I win at Jenga all the time.
Reposted by Larry’s Twin
It’s nice how my cat will be ignoring me but as soon as I’m doing something, “hey bitch, what’s going on? It’d be a shame if I got in your way”
August 21, 2025 at 1:29 PM
It’s nice how my cat will be ignoring me but as soon as I’m doing something, “hey bitch, what’s going on? It’d be a shame if I got in your way”
The two most overplayed songs in the history of radio are:
Free Fallon’ - Tom Petty
Yeah! - Usher
Free Fallon’ - Tom Petty
Yeah! - Usher
June 17, 2025 at 10:36 AM
The two most overplayed songs in the history of radio are:
Free Fallon’ - Tom Petty
Yeah! - Usher
Free Fallon’ - Tom Petty
Yeah! - Usher
Reposted by Larry’s Twin
When I said 'conviction is sexy', I meant beliefs, not felonies
June 5, 2025 at 6:11 PM
When I said 'conviction is sexy', I meant beliefs, not felonies
Reposted by Larry’s Twin
Now who wants a warm sourdough chocolate chip cookie? Line forms to the right.
June 2, 2025 at 2:19 AM
Now who wants a warm sourdough chocolate chip cookie? Line forms to the right.
Reposted by Larry’s Twin
I talk a lot of shit for someone who is routinely startled by the sound of my freezer making ice
May 17, 2025 at 5:55 PM
I talk a lot of shit for someone who is routinely startled by the sound of my freezer making ice
Reposted by Larry’s Twin
I have to remind myself to speak as lovingly to my kids as I do my sweet lil pets the cutey patootie cutey pies lil angels they are my lil honey bunches smooch smooch smooch
April 13, 2025 at 10:01 AM
I have to remind myself to speak as lovingly to my kids as I do my sweet lil pets the cutey patootie cutey pies lil angels they are my lil honey bunches smooch smooch smooch
Reposted by Larry’s Twin
aesthetically pleasing under good lighting and hard drugs
June 5, 2025 at 1:38 PM
aesthetically pleasing under good lighting and hard drugs
Reposted by Larry’s Twin
Commas, because I want you to breathe when I do.
June 2, 2025 at 12:36 PM
Commas, because I want you to breathe when I do.
*Pulling up in my minivan blaring Gloria Estefan.
Babe, you ready to have some fun before 9pm?
Babe, you ready to have some fun before 9pm?
June 5, 2025 at 5:03 PM
*Pulling up in my minivan blaring Gloria Estefan.
Babe, you ready to have some fun before 9pm?
Babe, you ready to have some fun before 9pm?
Reposted by Larry’s Twin
i dumped one of those flavored powder things in my water so I’m super hydrated or whatever
June 3, 2025 at 4:36 AM
i dumped one of those flavored powder things in my water so I’m super hydrated or whatever
Reposted by Larry’s Twin
I will use an entire roll of paper towels to squish and pick up a bug because eww
June 5, 2025 at 4:28 PM
I will use an entire roll of paper towels to squish and pick up a bug because eww
Reposted by Larry’s Twin
I love being domestic and shit
June 4, 2025 at 8:38 PM
I love being domestic and shit
Reposted by Larry’s Twin
Where you can find me for the rest of the year 🧜♀️
March 14, 2025 at 10:47 PM
Where you can find me for the rest of the year 🧜♀️
Reposted by Larry’s Twin
My dream woman has nice boobs, an oral fixation and likes quiet(ly smoking weed with me)
June 5, 2025 at 1:56 PM
My dream woman has nice boobs, an oral fixation and likes quiet(ly smoking weed with me)
Reposted by Larry’s Twin
A dad sneeze so powerful, they have to adjust the 10 day weather outlook.
June 5, 2025 at 1:56 PM
A dad sneeze so powerful, they have to adjust the 10 day weather outlook.
Reposted by Larry’s Twin
Having sex: *makes chainsaw noises*
May 16, 2025 at 10:08 PM
Having sex: *makes chainsaw noises*
Yes, I’ve danced as if no one was watching. It got me kicked out of Best Buy.
June 5, 2025 at 1:27 PM
Yes, I’ve danced as if no one was watching. It got me kicked out of Best Buy.
Sorry, I used up all my rizz trying to get extra fries from the waitress at Denny’s.
June 5, 2025 at 1:27 PM
Sorry, I used up all my rizz trying to get extra fries from the waitress at Denny’s.