CrBleak
@bleakchris.bsky.social
Here to smile politely and laugh at some jokes
Pro tip: keep a few tampons in your pockets at all times to flush down the toilets of any government building you may be in
January 30, 2025 at 5:52 PM
Pro tip: keep a few tampons in your pockets at all times to flush down the toilets of any government building you may be in
Reposted by CrBleak
Weirdly accurate in 2025
January 28, 2025 at 7:46 PM
Weirdly accurate in 2025
Reposted by CrBleak
Reposted by CrBleak
Reposted by CrBleak
Batman’s cool and all but…forever?
January 26, 2025 at 12:38 AM
Batman’s cool and all but…forever?
Reposted by CrBleak
[my glass shatters loudly against the wall of the biker bar] I said SKIM MILK
January 24, 2025 at 5:44 AM
[my glass shatters loudly against the wall of the biker bar] I said SKIM MILK
Accidentally hunkered up instead of down and am now floating through an endless void 😭
January 24, 2025 at 5:05 PM
Accidentally hunkered up instead of down and am now floating through an endless void 😭
Hey grandma, can you come pick me up from the sex party early?
You were right, I talked too much about The Garfield movie (2024) and no one wants to do it with me now. 😢
You were right, I talked too much about The Garfield movie (2024) and no one wants to do it with me now. 😢
January 24, 2025 at 12:37 AM
Hey grandma, can you come pick me up from the sex party early?
You were right, I talked too much about The Garfield movie (2024) and no one wants to do it with me now. 😢
You were right, I talked too much about The Garfield movie (2024) and no one wants to do it with me now. 😢
Reposted by CrBleak
Reposted by CrBleak
PEOPLE THINK IM NICE BUT THEY DONT KNOW I CHOOSE TO BE.
January 23, 2025 at 3:59 AM
PEOPLE THINK IM NICE BUT THEY DONT KNOW I CHOOSE TO BE.
Reposted by CrBleak
Reposted by CrBleak
Waitress says, "Say when," when grating parmesan
cheese. I never say when. The room fills with parmesan.
There are no survivors. 😏
cheese. I never say when. The room fills with parmesan.
There are no survivors. 😏
January 18, 2025 at 12:45 AM
Waitress says, "Say when," when grating parmesan
cheese. I never say when. The room fills with parmesan.
There are no survivors. 😏
cheese. I never say when. The room fills with parmesan.
There are no survivors. 😏
Reposted by CrBleak
DENTIST: I'll see you in 6 months.
ME: *under my breath* I'll see you in hell.
ME: *under my breath* I'll see you in hell.
January 14, 2025 at 5:15 AM
DENTIST: I'll see you in 6 months.
ME: *under my breath* I'll see you in hell.
ME: *under my breath* I'll see you in hell.
Reposted by CrBleak
[lying in bed after sex] Sorry for all the screaming, I'm afraid of the dark
January 1, 2025 at 4:54 AM
[lying in bed after sex] Sorry for all the screaming, I'm afraid of the dark
Reposted by CrBleak
[50yrs in the future]
Grandson: Grandpa, what was 2024 like?
Me: [motioning to america] This used to be aaallll assholes, as faaaar as the eye could see
Grandson: Grandpa, what was 2024 like?
Me: [motioning to america] This used to be aaallll assholes, as faaaar as the eye could see
January 1, 2025 at 1:13 AM
[50yrs in the future]
Grandson: Grandpa, what was 2024 like?
Me: [motioning to america] This used to be aaallll assholes, as faaaar as the eye could see
Grandson: Grandpa, what was 2024 like?
Me: [motioning to america] This used to be aaallll assholes, as faaaar as the eye could see
Reposted by CrBleak
A John Wick movie where he assassinates everyone shooting off fireworks in a residential area because they upset his dog.
December 31, 2024 at 11:55 PM
A John Wick movie where he assassinates everyone shooting off fireworks in a residential area because they upset his dog.
Reposted by CrBleak
Word of the Day is one I keep posting at the end of the year, hoping its time will come.
‘Respair’, from the 16th century, is fresh hope, and a recovery from despair.
Here’s to a few drops of respair in 2025.
‘Respair’, from the 16th century, is fresh hope, and a recovery from despair.
Here’s to a few drops of respair in 2025.
December 31, 2024 at 7:12 PM
Word of the Day is one I keep posting at the end of the year, hoping its time will come.
‘Respair’, from the 16th century, is fresh hope, and a recovery from despair.
Here’s to a few drops of respair in 2025.
‘Respair’, from the 16th century, is fresh hope, and a recovery from despair.
Here’s to a few drops of respair in 2025.
Reposted by CrBleak
Praying that Biden will pardon my French before leaving office 🤞🤞
December 2, 2024 at 5:20 AM
Praying that Biden will pardon my French before leaving office 🤞🤞
Reposted by CrBleak
I haven't said it here yet, so just FYI, I love you and there's absolutely nothing you can do about it.
November 26, 2024 at 9:22 PM
I haven't said it here yet, so just FYI, I love you and there's absolutely nothing you can do about it.
Reposted by CrBleak
i’m gonna just watch this at least once a day and i recommend everyone do the same
November 6, 2024 at 11:00 AM
i’m gonna just watch this at least once a day and i recommend everyone do the same
Reposted by CrBleak
this is the thing, they could pass a law saying the Earth is fucking flat (and if there were a way to make a buck on it, i'm sure they would.) but whatever happens in that court of the damned or thereafter, remember this-
our joy is fucking real. their laws arent.
and they will never take our joy!
our joy is fucking real. their laws arent.
and they will never take our joy!
November 12, 2024 at 4:37 PM
this is the thing, they could pass a law saying the Earth is fucking flat (and if there were a way to make a buck on it, i'm sure they would.) but whatever happens in that court of the damned or thereafter, remember this-
our joy is fucking real. their laws arent.
and they will never take our joy!
our joy is fucking real. their laws arent.
and they will never take our joy!
Really makes you think..
lol
lol
April 25, 2024 at 5:35 PM
Really makes you think..
lol
lol