Bri 👅
@tinysodacans.bsky.social
All my friends are heathens, make it so. |-/ 🖖🏼
(He/Him)
(He/Him)
Reposted by Bri 👅
Reposted by Bri 👅
My strangest childhood belief was that the number of testicles you had was the number of children you were destined to father. I don’t recall if this belief ever intersected with the knowledge my grandpa had seven kids.
November 26, 2025 at 4:51 AM
My strangest childhood belief was that the number of testicles you had was the number of children you were destined to father. I don’t recall if this belief ever intersected with the knowledge my grandpa had seven kids.
Reposted by Bri 👅
Dang. I posted this last night and should have waited a day.
November 24, 2025 at 3:53 PM
Dang. I posted this last night and should have waited a day.
Reposted by Bri 👅
I saw some teens today. I asked them who represents them best. They told me that Gen Alpha and Zoomers are on Tiktok and Instagram demanding more and more clips of Alan Dershowitz. They can’t get enough of him. He is the voice of their generation. The voice America needs.
"elevate charismatic figures such as Alan Dershowitz"
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November 25, 2025 at 5:07 AM
I saw some teens today. I asked them who represents them best. They told me that Gen Alpha and Zoomers are on Tiktok and Instagram demanding more and more clips of Alan Dershowitz. They can’t get enough of him. He is the voice of their generation. The voice America needs.
Reposted by Bri 👅
This is a situation where crossing the streams would be catastrophic
Good morning. In the past 24 hours, more Americans have Googled “felching” than have searched for “turkey recipes”
November 25, 2025 at 2:24 AM
This is a situation where crossing the streams would be catastrophic
The manual for the first Scribblenauts game claims there are 30 bonus levels you can buy from the Ollar Store, but they don’t exist. The button that would allow you to access them is technically still there, but it’s invisible, and tapping it crashes the game.
i was going through my X archives and found this by @superpodsaga.com, which I qrt'd at some point years ago
so, let me bring the question back: what is the most useless piece of video game knowledge you know?
so, let me bring the question back: what is the most useless piece of video game knowledge you know?
November 24, 2025 at 7:23 AM
The manual for the first Scribblenauts game claims there are 30 bonus levels you can buy from the Ollar Store, but they don’t exist. The button that would allow you to access them is technically still there, but it’s invisible, and tapping it crashes the game.
Reposted by Bri 👅
Reposted by Bri 👅
Whoever named scrotum really nailed it. Like, yeah, that’s definitely scrotum down there.
November 22, 2025 at 8:09 AM
Whoever named scrotum really nailed it. Like, yeah, that’s definitely scrotum down there.
I’m not reading any of that shit.
November 22, 2025 at 6:37 AM
I’m not reading any of that shit.
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When you just beat your shit crazy style and you see your son’s name pop up on the caller ID
November 22, 2025 at 2:20 AM
When you just beat your shit crazy style and you see your son’s name pop up on the caller ID
Reposted by Bri 👅
Steak ’N Shake Employee Screams After Nude RFK Jr. Climbs Out Of Beef Tallow Fryer
Steak ’N Shake Employee Screams After Nude RFK Jr. Climbs Out Of Beef Tallow Fryer
SOUTH BEND, IN—Expressing horror at the sight of the health secretary’s bare torso emerging from the vat of grease, a local Steak ’n Shake employee reportedly screamed Friday after a nude Robert F. Ke...
theonion.com
November 21, 2025 at 8:16 PM
Steak ’N Shake Employee Screams After Nude RFK Jr. Climbs Out Of Beef Tallow Fryer
You ever have a bag leak in your trash can and find a giant circle of mold at the bottom, and be all like, “Fuck that shit,” and throw it out and buy a new one?
November 21, 2025 at 6:14 AM
You ever have a bag leak in your trash can and find a giant circle of mold at the bottom, and be all like, “Fuck that shit,” and throw it out and buy a new one?
Reposted by Bri 👅
"JD Vance is lactating" is the sort of sentence I wish never appeared in my mind.
November 21, 2025 at 1:35 AM
"JD Vance is lactating" is the sort of sentence I wish never appeared in my mind.
Reposted by Bri 👅
Reposted by Bri 👅
When I was watching XPlay, this Mountain Dew ad came on where this guy forcefemmes transgenderizes his homie.
November 19, 2025 at 7:40 PM
When I was watching XPlay, this Mountain Dew ad came on where this guy forcefemmes transgenderizes his homie.
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I can’t believe I’m going to say this, but maybe some people *should* use ChatGPT to write
November 18, 2025 at 3:37 AM
I can’t believe I’m going to say this, but maybe some people *should* use ChatGPT to write
Reposted by Bri 👅
Was she watching the McLaughlin Group in a constant state of arousal
November 18, 2025 at 3:45 AM
Was she watching the McLaughlin Group in a constant state of arousal
Reposted by Bri 👅
the seven little words every woman wants to hear: "baby don't worry. it's not a worm"
November 17, 2025 at 2:25 PM
the seven little words every woman wants to hear: "baby don't worry. it's not a worm"
Reposted by Bri 👅
feels like "one of my best friends was the world's most famous pedophile" should keep you from teaching but i am not harvard
Larry Summers tells @theharvardcrimson.bsky.social
he’s stepping back from all public commitments in light of his messages with Epstein, saying he is “deeply ashamed” and hopes “to rebuild trust and repair relationships.”
He will continue teaching.
www.thecrimson.com/article/2025...
he’s stepping back from all public commitments in light of his messages with Epstein, saying he is “deeply ashamed” and hopes “to rebuild trust and repair relationships.”
He will continue teaching.
www.thecrimson.com/article/2025...
November 18, 2025 at 1:52 AM
feels like "one of my best friends was the world's most famous pedophile" should keep you from teaching but i am not harvard
Reposted by Bri 👅
Reposted by Bri 👅
He was a Whopper, I was a McRib—back for a limited time, only at participating locations. He told me to "have it your way," I was content enough to say "I'm lovin' it." Could I really be his Burger Queen? He doesn't have a worm in his brain by the way. So the memes are wrong, the ones about the worm
November 17, 2025 at 3:35 PM
He was a Whopper, I was a McRib—back for a limited time, only at participating locations. He told me to "have it your way," I was content enough to say "I'm lovin' it." Could I really be his Burger Queen? He doesn't have a worm in his brain by the way. So the memes are wrong, the ones about the worm
Reposted by Bri 👅
women are always saying “lord grant me the confidence of a mediocre man.” ok well he did. now what. is the world a better place? look at what you’ve wrought.
Olivia Nuzzi's 'American Canto': Read the Exclusive Excerpt
She flamed out and she faded away. 'Vanity Fair'’s West Coast Editor returns to the written word to survey scorched earth.
www.vanityfair.com
November 17, 2025 at 3:46 PM
women are always saying “lord grant me the confidence of a mediocre man.” ok well he did. now what. is the world a better place? look at what you’ve wrought.
Reposted by Bri 👅
November 17, 2025 at 4:54 AM