Tim Curry getting slapped and trying to not cry in “Home Alone 2” is on par with anything Daniel Day Lewis ever did.

this is not behavior becoming of a FIFA Peace Prize recipient.

Probably the time I sat down to watch a film and instead a damn train drove right at the screen!!!

The most genuinely human Trump ever seems to me is when he’s desperately fighting to stay awake.

With his new comedy show and debut novel, is it time to let Louis C.K. force women to watch him masturbate again?

the point of the ballroom obvs has nothing to do with aesthetics. it's to create an architectural structure to honor the patronage networks that currently dominate US politics. previous WH venues hosted maybe a couple of hundred people; this hosts nearly 1,000 rich donors.

There was never any deal to be had anyway, so this just pulls off the façade.

We live in the greatest country.

The flew the entire military leadership in so they could see for themselves that the Secretary of Defense is a mouthbreathing dipshit and the Commander in Chief is a senile, weak old man who might keel over at any moment.

An air of sadness hangs over 9/11 this year

everyone is being unfair to mister trump. he finally found a new best friend after his previous best friend died in prison under mysterious circumstances a few years ago. he’s moving on and i for one am happy for him.

when they close it all up, I do believe this will go down as the funniest video on the internet

HULK SMASH!
HULK SMASH!
HULK HURT.
HULK grieve.
Hulk heal.
Hulk love.
Hulk sleep.
Hulk dream.
Hulk dream the dreams of fortunate men.
Men not dashed upon seas of torment.
Men cradled in the blossom of gentle waters.

But, Hulk smash.
Yes.
Hulk smash.

Man, if only that guy had read this before he got caught

2015: LOCK HER UP
2016: LOCK HER UP!
2017: LOCK HER UP!!
2018: LOCK THEM UP!
2019: LOCK THEM UP!!
2020: LOCK THEM UP!!!
2021: LOCK THEM ALL UP!
2022: LOCK THEM ALL UP!!
2023: 𝗟𝗢𝗖𝗞 𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗠 𝗔𝗟𝗟 𝗨𝗣ⵑⵑⵑ☠️🔪
2024: 𝐋̀̔́̀̈𝐎̛̛̗͈̹̍̓𝐂̇͋̓̓͒̍𝐊̓́́̇͒̏̔ 𝐓̣͈̒̒̍̀́́̕𝐇̣̐̎́̎𝐄̛̈̒̈́̈́𝐌̛̜͈̹̹͒̀̕ 𝐀̦̜̎̐̏𝐋͈̤̈́́́̀̓́̕𝐋̩̣̤̒̀̎̈́ 𝐔̛̤̜̜̀̍̕𝐏̹̣̦̏̓̈ⵑ̖̗̤͋̋ⵑ̦̇̈̓̔ⵑ̤̩̤̎̍́̒́ⵑ̛̖́̍͒̔̓̀
2025: godd why are you people so obsessed just let it go already jeez

Today’s the 50th anniversary of the release of “Jaws” which means it’s the 48th anniversary of watching it at the Mustang Drive In immediately after which my brother threw me into our pitch black swimming pool because he “saw the shark in there” and then I screamed so hard I got a nose bleed.

It’s been exactly 50 years since Jaws came out, which means it’s been exactly 49 years and 50 weeks since I first became afraid of a shark swimming up through the toilet and biting my nutsack.

just saw a group of masked men stuffing masked ICE agents into an unmarked car, who were saying "we're ICE we're ICE!" but the abductors shouted to the crowd "no we're ICE!" no one knew who was ICE, so no one in the crowd said anything.

Torontonians aren’t big on ritual, but they know what to do with a dead raccoon

“She’s not yours to pity. She’s mine to marvel at.”

www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/an-...

all of Trump's TRUTH SOCIAL posts should be read aloud in the style of Parker Posey doing Victoria Ratliff

I love love love The Studio on Apple TV and the first episode is so funny but also....I really really want to see Martin Scorsese's Jonestown movie and they should make that movie and give him his $200m budget.

“Wow. Everything’s computer!”

- President of the United States 🇺🇸