Sal Gentile
@salgentile.bsky.social
comedy writer. I write and produce A Closer Look at Late Night with Seth Meyers, where I am a supervising writer/producer. obsessed mets fan. follow me on instagram: salgentile
Pinned
Sal Gentile
@salgentile.bsky.social
· Jul 15
Trump: "AOC -- look. I think she's very nice. But she's very low IQ, and we really don't need low IQ. Between her and Crockett, we're gonna give 'em both an IQ test to see who comes out best. I took a real test at Walter Reed medical center and I aced it. Now it's time for them to take a test."
if you took a dementia test and thought it was an IQ test you failed both the dementia test and the IQ test
very healthy and normal society we have where the guys who show up to daycares and say “where are the children” are somehow winning
January 5, 2026 at 7:09 PM
very healthy and normal society we have where the guys who show up to daycares and say “where are the children” are somehow winning
wild that for months they said repeatedly “we want the oil” “we’ll have a field day with the oil” “if we attack venezuela oil prices will go down” then they do it and say “actually it’s about drugs and democracy” and a bunch of doormats in the media are like “yeah it’s about drugs and democracy”
January 4, 2026 at 8:57 PM
wild that for months they said repeatedly “we want the oil” “we’ll have a field day with the oil” “if we attack venezuela oil prices will go down” then they do it and say “actually it’s about drugs and democracy” and a bunch of doormats in the media are like “yeah it’s about drugs and democracy”
coolest thing to happen underground in nyc since the teenage mutant ninja turtles
January 1, 2026 at 5:18 AM
coolest thing to happen underground in nyc since the teenage mutant ninja turtles
“zohran mamdani is a hypocrite because his landlord is jacking up the rent for the next tenant” is a sequence of words that should immediately trigger a mandatory cognitive test
Zohran Mamdani’s rent-stabilized Astoria apartment renting for 35% more than socialist lawmaker paid: ‘hypocrisy’
Zohran Mamdani’s rent-stabilized Astoria apartment renting for 35% more than socialist lawmaker paid: ‘hypocrisy’
The Astoria apartment -- which has quietly attracted interest from potential tenants for the past few weeks -- is now commanding $3,100 per month while still remaining rent stabilized, sources said.
nypost.com
December 27, 2025 at 11:45 PM
“zohran mamdani is a hypocrite because his landlord is jacking up the rent for the next tenant” is a sequence of words that should immediately trigger a mandatory cognitive test
shoveling the walkway after a snowstorm is a key opportunity to celebrate Dad Culture. making involuntary grunts and other loud noises, emphasizing to your child the importance of “using your lower body,” insisting on wearing two pairs of socks. these are the time honored traditions of our people
December 27, 2025 at 8:42 PM
shoveling the walkway after a snowstorm is a key opportunity to celebrate Dad Culture. making involuntary grunts and other loud noises, emphasizing to your child the importance of “using your lower body,” insisting on wearing two pairs of socks. these are the time honored traditions of our people
who the fuck invented christmas melancholy? why am I sobbing next to a sleeping 5 year old thinking about how this is probably the last year he’ll think the polar express is real and that santa “made” all the spider-man legos himself? i give the human condition 0 out of 5 stars, this shit sucks
December 26, 2025 at 2:11 AM
who the fuck invented christmas melancholy? why am I sobbing next to a sleeping 5 year old thinking about how this is probably the last year he’ll think the polar express is real and that santa “made” all the spider-man legos himself? i give the human condition 0 out of 5 stars, this shit sucks
Reposted by Sal Gentile
Now seems like a swell time to point out that Frontline just released this excellent 11-minute mini-documentary about what happened inside CECOT.
Surviving CECOT (full documentary) | Deported to a Maximum-Security Prison | FRONTLINE + ProPublica
YouTube video by FRONTLINE PBS | Official
m.youtube.com
December 21, 2025 at 10:26 PM
Now seems like a swell time to point out that Frontline just released this excellent 11-minute mini-documentary about what happened inside CECOT.
the first town hall was in primetime after football and had half the viewership of a typical colbert episode, which is at 11:30 (and that’s not counting millions more for colbert on youtube and social). so let’s stop pretending any of this is about ratings or profitability.
December 18, 2025 at 2:25 PM
the first town hall was in primetime after football and had half the viewership of a typical colbert episode, which is at 11:30 (and that’s not counting millions more for colbert on youtube and social). so let’s stop pretending any of this is about ratings or profitability.
Reposted by Sal Gentile
Know your rights. Protect your neighbors.
New York is — and always will be — a city for all immigrants.
New York is — and always will be — a city for all immigrants.
December 7, 2025 at 5:03 PM
Know your rights. Protect your neighbors.
New York is — and always will be — a city for all immigrants.
New York is — and always will be — a city for all immigrants.
my skin crawls just imagining the utter humiliation I would feel knowing that everywhere I went people had to give me a fake little award they made up in order to calm me down and make me feel like a special big boy
December 5, 2025 at 8:36 PM
my skin crawls just imagining the utter humiliation I would feel knowing that everywhere I went people had to give me a fake little award they made up in order to calm me down and make me feel like a special big boy
trump (after zohran mamdani charms him for 5 minutes): “we’re looking very strongly at implementing socialism, many people are saying it. they love redistribution of wealth and you’re hearing it more and more. there’s a term, they call it, a centrally planned economy. it’s an old fashioned term”
November 21, 2025 at 8:56 PM
trump (after zohran mamdani charms him for 5 minutes): “we’re looking very strongly at implementing socialism, many people are saying it. they love redistribution of wealth and you’re hearing it more and more. there’s a term, they call it, a centrally planned economy. it’s an old fashioned term”
(serious unbiased journalist voice) “are you trying to distract from the president’s refusal to make health care affordable by pointing out that he was also friends with a pedophile?”
Margaret Brennan to Tom Suozzi: "Can you explain the focus this past week in the House by Democrats on the Jeffrey Epstein files? Is this a tactic to distract from the failure to extract healthcare changes?"
November 16, 2025 at 4:22 PM
(serious unbiased journalist voice) “are you trying to distract from the president’s refusal to make health care affordable by pointing out that he was also friends with a pedophile?”
this is why you work out your material in the clubs BEFORE you go on tour
Okay this is more his standard. (This whole situation is very freaking funny.)
November 15, 2025 at 4:36 PM
this is why you work out your material in the clubs BEFORE you go on tour
trump calling her “marjorie taylor brown” and then having to explain that it’s because “green grass turns brown” is the clearest sign yet that his brain is gone. sad to see. the one thing he was ok at was names. he could’ve gone after her for insider trading. “marjorie taylor GREED” was right there
November 15, 2025 at 3:37 PM
trump calling her “marjorie taylor brown” and then having to explain that it’s because “green grass turns brown” is the clearest sign yet that his brain is gone. sad to see. the one thing he was ok at was names. he could’ve gone after her for insider trading. “marjorie taylor GREED” was right there
if someone asks you “did the doctors scan your brain” and you say “I don’t know what they scanned” that’s how you know you need a brain scan
November 15, 2025 at 3:41 AM
if someone asks you “did the doctors scan your brain” and you say “I don’t know what they scanned” that’s how you know you need a brain scan
(AI nana) “oh darling, I would love to tell you your favorite bedtime story, but before I do — did you know that with DraftKings, new customers bet $5 to get $200 worth of bonus bets instantly?”
November 14, 2025 at 5:49 AM
(AI nana) “oh darling, I would love to tell you your favorite bedtime story, but before I do — did you know that with DraftKings, new customers bet $5 to get $200 worth of bonus bets instantly?”
zohran is mayor and vine is back. the message is clear: millennials are winning
Vine reboot called diVine has been launched 📱
• Funded by Jack Dorsey
• Includes over 100K videos from Vine's archive
• Users can upload 6-second videos
• AI-generated content is not allowed
• Funded by Jack Dorsey
• Includes over 100K videos from Vine's archive
• Users can upload 6-second videos
• AI-generated content is not allowed
November 14, 2025 at 12:22 AM
zohran is mayor and vine is back. the message is clear: millennials are winning
last night’s closer look on democrats caving to a guy who got crushed in elections, is at all time lows in job approval, got booed at a football game and fell asleep in the oval office five days ago youtu.be/uBrKw6Q0pvo?...
Trump Booed at NFL Game; Democrats Cave on Shutdown Despite Big Wins, Favorable Polls: A Closer Look
YouTube video by Late Night with Seth Meyers
youtu.be
November 11, 2025 at 3:57 PM
last night’s closer look on democrats caving to a guy who got crushed in elections, is at all time lows in job approval, got booed at a football game and fell asleep in the oval office five days ago youtu.be/uBrKw6Q0pvo?...
amazon please hire me! I have a solution. I will write a script that starts “EXT. ISLAND — JAMES BOND (new, different young guy) is running through the Jungle from THREE BAD GUYS with guns” and no one will remember or care how the last movie ended.
please pay me one million dollars.
please pay me one million dollars.
this kind of feels like freaking out over a problem that 95% of the audience is not going to have an issue with
Report: Amazon Is Struggling to Think How to Bring James Bond Back From the Dead
Daniel Craig's permanent exit in 'No Time to Die' is apparently causing issues for the next 'Bond' film.
gizmodo.com
November 11, 2025 at 3:47 PM
amazon please hire me! I have a solution. I will write a script that starts “EXT. ISLAND — JAMES BOND (new, different young guy) is running through the Jungle from THREE BAD GUYS with guns” and no one will remember or care how the last movie ended.
please pay me one million dollars.
please pay me one million dollars.
democratic voters wanted their party to shut down the government for myriad reasons — troops in american cities, masked thugs ripping families apart — but dem leaders insisted the wise thing to do politically was to stay hyper-fxated on this one thing, ACA tax credits. and then they just… gave up
November 10, 2025 at 3:31 AM
democratic voters wanted their party to shut down the government for myriad reasons — troops in american cities, masked thugs ripping families apart — but dem leaders insisted the wise thing to do politically was to stay hyper-fxated on this one thing, ACA tax credits. and then they just… gave up
shutdown deal per AXIOS:
republicans get: government reopens and party avoids political consequences for refusing to make health care affordable
democrats get: seven beans, an old case logic CD wallet (empty), a coupon for 15% off Busch Gardens, one spiced pumpkin scented candle, a 6-pack of Zima
republicans get: government reopens and party avoids political consequences for refusing to make health care affordable
democrats get: seven beans, an old case logic CD wallet (empty), a coupon for 15% off Busch Gardens, one spiced pumpkin scented candle, a 6-pack of Zima
November 10, 2025 at 12:42 AM
shutdown deal per AXIOS:
republicans get: government reopens and party avoids political consequences for refusing to make health care affordable
democrats get: seven beans, an old case logic CD wallet (empty), a coupon for 15% off Busch Gardens, one spiced pumpkin scented candle, a 6-pack of Zima
republicans get: government reopens and party avoids political consequences for refusing to make health care affordable
democrats get: seven beans, an old case logic CD wallet (empty), a coupon for 15% off Busch Gardens, one spiced pumpkin scented candle, a 6-pack of Zima
if it turns out Democrats “negotiated” a “deal” that allows DONALD TRUMP to SEND OUT CHECKS WITH HIS NAME ON THEM I think we would have to seriously investigate the possibility that chuck schumer is a GOP manchurian candidate and the code word that activates him is “ballroom”
"A development that appeared to break the logjam: Republicans proposed that healthcare funding be provided directly to households rather than used to pay for a 1-year extension of ACA subsidies. That involves sending federal money into FSAs instead of insurance companies" www.wsj.com/politics/pol...
Republicans Pitch Alternative to ACA Extension to End Government Shutdown
A proposal by GOP senators to send money directly to consumers’ health accounts rather than to insurance companies showed signs of breaking a stalemate on negotiations.
www.wsj.com
November 9, 2025 at 11:09 PM
if it turns out Democrats “negotiated” a “deal” that allows DONALD TRUMP to SEND OUT CHECKS WITH HIS NAME ON THEM I think we would have to seriously investigate the possibility that chuck schumer is a GOP manchurian candidate and the code word that activates him is “ballroom”
Reposted by Sal Gentile
if democrats are serious about winning they need to learn from tonight and convert to islam
November 5, 2025 at 2:48 AM
if democrats are serious about winning they need to learn from tonight and convert to islam
stephen miller currently sobbing as he consumes a live goat in his cage in the white house basement
November 5, 2025 at 3:09 AM
stephen miller currently sobbing as he consumes a live goat in his cage in the white house basement
how fucking embarrassing for chuck schumer that he didn’t endorse the democratic nominee for mayor. dude is begging for a primary and it doesn’t even have to be AOC. as we learned tonight it could be an assemblyman no one’s heard of from queens. schumer should be shaking in his boots tonight.
November 5, 2025 at 3:06 AM
how fucking embarrassing for chuck schumer that he didn’t endorse the democratic nominee for mayor. dude is begging for a primary and it doesn’t even have to be AOC. as we learned tonight it could be an assemblyman no one’s heard of from queens. schumer should be shaking in his boots tonight.