Keith Taylor
@mrkeithtaylor.bsky.social
Bestselling author of This Is the Way the World Ends: an Oral History of the Zombie War: http://amzn.to/3O6xBWm
Anti-Brexit and pro-Free Movement. Denizen of Mongolia
Posts: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:7bv2ca3yawj662o7qxd5xyt7/feed/aaak2agiw6iwg
Anti-Brexit and pro-Free Movement. Denizen of Mongolia
Posts: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:7bv2ca3yawj662o7qxd5xyt7/feed/aaak2agiw6iwg
Pinned
Apropos of absolutely nothing at all, my novel This Is the Way the World Ends: an Oral History of the Zombie War contains lots of valuable tips to help you survive the collapse of society.
I mean... most of the tips are zombie related, but they're transferable.
www.amazon.com/This-Way-Wor...
I mean... most of the tips are zombie related, but they're transferable.
www.amazon.com/This-Way-Wor...
Reposted by Keith Taylor
A funny time traveler thing to do would be to take a modern day Denny's menu and go back to rome and use it to convince Julius Cesar that a salad is his only historical legacy right as he's being stabbed. Like, right when the light is going out of his eyes. Hilarious.
January 4, 2026 at 2:44 AM
A funny time traveler thing to do would be to take a modern day Denny's menu and go back to rome and use it to convince Julius Cesar that a salad is his only historical legacy right as he's being stabbed. Like, right when the light is going out of his eyes. Hilarious.
Reposted by Keith Taylor
finally, we're living through precedented times
January 4, 2026 at 6:56 AM
finally, we're living through precedented times
Reposted by Keith Taylor
You should be embarrassed to be a member of congress and issuing anything other than impeachment resolutions. You're in the model UN. They should give you legos and a propeller hat
January 3, 2026 at 3:57 PM
You should be embarrassed to be a member of congress and issuing anything other than impeachment resolutions. You're in the model UN. They should give you legos and a propeller hat
It's me. I'm bombing Venezuela. They know what they did.
January 3, 2026 at 7:49 AM
It's me. I'm bombing Venezuela. They know what they did.
Barbara is short for Barbarellara
January 3, 2026 at 5:11 AM
Barbara is short for Barbarellara
Reposted by Keith Taylor
(guy who got the shit beat out of him by a bull at his last rodeo) this isn't my first rodeo
January 3, 2026 at 1:58 AM
(guy who got the shit beat out of him by a bull at his last rodeo) this isn't my first rodeo
Reposted by Keith Taylor
on a government watchlist for perfect sweeties
January 3, 2026 at 1:09 AM
on a government watchlist for perfect sweeties
Reposted by Keith Taylor
i'm the king's poison taster, it's a pretty good job except i get poisoned a lot
January 2, 2026 at 4:58 PM
i'm the king's poison taster, it's a pretty good job except i get poisoned a lot
Reposted by Keith Taylor
swallowing each individual baked bean like an ibuprofen
January 2, 2026 at 6:29 PM
swallowing each individual baked bean like an ibuprofen
Every piece of footage I've ever seen of flying fish looked fake as shit. I think Attenborough and sailors are pranking us, just like I do with my burrowing horses.
January 2, 2026 at 2:47 PM
Every piece of footage I've ever seen of flying fish looked fake as shit. I think Attenborough and sailors are pranking us, just like I do with my burrowing horses.
"I'm really enjoying this Peroni," I remarked. "It has a lot of pep. Heeeeyyyyyy."
And that, my friends, was the moment the sausage beer you all know and love was born.
And that, my friends, was the moment the sausage beer you all know and love was born.
January 2, 2026 at 8:53 AM
"I'm really enjoying this Peroni," I remarked. "It has a lot of pep. Heeeeyyyyyy."
And that, my friends, was the moment the sausage beer you all know and love was born.
And that, my friends, was the moment the sausage beer you all know and love was born.
Reposted by Keith Taylor
A bel biv devoe bahn mi shop called that girl is hoisin
January 2, 2026 at 2:57 AM
A bel biv devoe bahn mi shop called that girl is hoisin
Reposted by Keith Taylor
Asked to see the secret menu at McDonald's and Grimace showed me his weird dick
January 2, 2026 at 4:32 AM
Asked to see the secret menu at McDonald's and Grimace showed me his weird dick
New year, new m(inor injury from working out dumb)
January 2, 2026 at 4:47 AM
New year, new m(inor injury from working out dumb)
Reposted by Keith Taylor
AI CEOs: why aren't people more pro-AI?!
also AI CEOs: we have invented the automated revenge porn machine
also AI CEOs: we have invented the automated revenge porn machine
January 1, 2026 at 2:06 PM
AI CEOs: why aren't people more pro-AI?!
also AI CEOs: we have invented the automated revenge porn machine
also AI CEOs: we have invented the automated revenge porn machine
Reposted by Keith Taylor
2026 is the year I switch to "that's so real bestie" as a way to get out of a Jeopardy! contestant interview.
January 1, 2026 at 8:19 PM
2026 is the year I switch to "that's so real bestie" as a way to get out of a Jeopardy! contestant interview.
Got to hand it to Stranger Things, that was a strong finish.
January 1, 2026 at 2:19 PM
Got to hand it to Stranger Things, that was a strong finish.
I think my brand of leaded toothpaste will really take off this year.
January 1, 2026 at 8:36 AM
I think my brand of leaded toothpaste will really take off this year.
Reposted by Keith Taylor
if you start Before Sunset right now it will finish at 11:58pm, giving you a couple of minutes to stare at your disgusting reflection in the black TV screen
December 31, 2025 at 10:39 PM
if you start Before Sunset right now it will finish at 11:58pm, giving you a couple of minutes to stare at your disgusting reflection in the black TV screen
Reposted by Keith Taylor
Sitting here without my glasses on, micro-dosing the innocence before the fall.
January 1, 2026 at 2:58 AM
Sitting here without my glasses on, micro-dosing the innocence before the fall.
Reposted by Keith Taylor
Let’s cut it out with all the entropy this year, huh? See what happens.
January 1, 2026 at 6:14 AM
Let’s cut it out with all the entropy this year, huh? See what happens.
I think carbon-based life was a really smart move. All of my favourite people are made of carbon.
January 1, 2026 at 6:25 AM
I think carbon-based life was a really smart move. All of my favourite people are made of carbon.
We're making Pluto a planet again in 2026. Then? Then we conquer.
January 1, 2026 at 6:02 AM
We're making Pluto a planet again in 2026. Then? Then we conquer.
Last night I was expecting a visitor that didn't work out as she was still at the club when my energy bar hit zero at 5AM, but on the upside on the way home I bought chocolate eclairs for two, and now at midday on Jan 1st they're all mine. Happy new year, me.
January 1, 2026 at 3:33 AM
Last night I was expecting a visitor that didn't work out as she was still at the club when my energy bar hit zero at 5AM, but on the upside on the way home I bought chocolate eclairs for two, and now at midday on Jan 1st they're all mine. Happy new year, me.